however, an amazing woman walked into my life 2 weeks ago and there is nothing i can do about but admit i love her like crazy and would love to be with her forever. everything is so wonderful and beautiful it's as if i am being rewarded for all the pain and suffering i have been through and still going through. i still miss my wife and will love her forever but should that stop me having deep feelings and enjoying life with someone knew. ????????
2007-02-18 20:21:29 · 30 answers · asked by curlyloxx 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Take the golden memories, your love for your wife ...in the palm of your hand and blow it in the wind, as you would ,a palm full of rose petals. Let her rest in peace, be peaceful and sometimes, when you inhale a fragrance in the air, just think its your wife, looking after you as your guardian angel. Be happy n spread happiness.
2007-02-18 20:31:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I could have written this myself. My wife died 18 months ago this week, aged 49. We had been together since we were15. Towards the end she told me to find someone & not to be alone. I too have started a sort of relationship with an old friend, but I feel very guilty, it is as if I am being unfaithful to my wife, but we are just taking it slowly. Like me you will never forget your wife & nobody will take that special place in your heart. I have been through almost unbareable pain & I am sure that you have.
I would say that if you are both sure about the relationship go for it but please be careful dont try to make this relationship the same as the one with your wife, you could get hurt & that would only add to your grief.
Good luck friend from a fellow sufferer, I really do hope that it works out for you & that you find happiness.
2007-02-18 23:10:49 · answer #2 · answered by wayforwardhow 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry!! I cannot even begin to comprehend the pain you suffered from your loss! Your first wife will always be with you in your heart and soul. You will never forget her memory and the wonderful life you shared together.
Life does go on mate, and you need to move on the best way you can. As a few have already said, your wife would not have wanted you to be miserable and lonely for the rest of your life. Stop beating yourself up!! Go and enjoy your new love, do not feel guilty. I wish you all the very very best!!!! :o)
2007-02-18 20:31:55 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Does she feel the same way? So long as she knows how you will always feel about your wife and understand that then why not go for it. no-one can accuse you of being selfish or uncaring. Unfortunately we can't decide when we want to fall in love with someone, it just happens. I sure that your wife is watching you now wondering why you are so worried about what you are doing and is even giving you a playful push towards this woman because she will want to see you enjoy you life and hopefully share it with someone. Your wife will always know that she is fist in your heart.
Do jump straight in and take time to enjoy dating again and it may work. I wish you soo much happiness and good luck
xxx
2007-02-18 20:28:41 · answer #4 · answered by smudge 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe this depends on your philosophy of marriage and relationships. Would like to ask some questions and to list some thoughts as well:
1. Have you ever promised your wife not to become engaged in any other relationship?
2. Do you have a certain religion that you believe in? what would that religion tell you to do in such case and what are the basis for that?
3. Do feel that you have some responsibilities in life that you have to take off your back and that this new relationship is just a way to escape your problems? Do you really believe that this girl is perfect or that this is just a way for you to run away your grief?
4. What would you wish for your wife if you where in her place?
5. Is this fair for your kids, your new partner to still have emotions to your wife and be in another relationship? Does this new person understand your social situation?
If I were in your shoes I will not get into a relationship If I have know my wife for a long time. I believe that one should be married to only one other person and that marriage is something that we should only experience once in our lives.
2007-02-18 20:38:52 · answer #5 · answered by JZ 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No it should not, you go for it, a second chance at happiness with someone should not be passed up. BUT....
Be careful you are still in the grieving process for your wife and sometimes that can twist ones view on things.
Enjoy your new relationship but take your time before making a major commitment such as marriage, its very easy to convince yourself that you are in love, because at our age the fear of being on your own is very strong.
I speak from experience I have gone through almost the same thing as you and got hurt when the relationship with a woman I thought I loved fell apart.
Talk to her and tell her your fears if she is right for you she will understand.
I still love my wife but shes gone and she would want me to be happy and I'm sure yours would too.
Good luck friend I hope it works out for you!
2007-02-18 20:33:40 · answer #6 · answered by Your Nuts! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, how wonderful.
You are lucky twice in your life. That is like lightning striking. That's like winning a jackpot twice.
Go for it young man. Whoever you are, I am happy just to hear that a fellow human is starting his life all over again.
But..........wait a minute.........
You are not lucky after all.......it is YOU. Perhaps your personality is such that you attract the right person to come along. You probably are that kind and the beautiful thing is you do not even know about it.
This relationship does not mean you did not love your wife deeply. Yes, you do. I am sure given the circumstances your wife would approve it.
Congratulations.
.
2007-02-18 20:33:43 · answer #7 · answered by Nightrider 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I am sure that your wife would want you to be happy and not live the rest of your life alone. I know that if I was to go before my husband, I would want a good woman to look after him. It is natural that you will still love your wife and miss her, I am sure that your new lady will understand this.
2007-02-18 20:28:26 · answer #8 · answered by chelle0980 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It does not mean that you have forgotten your wife or do not love her anymore. Loneliness is a terrible thing and I'm sure your wife would love to see you happy again, deep inside she knows that she will be with you always. Perhaps from the above she is sending you this new lady in your life to make you smile again.
My advise live life without regret, so give it a try.
Best wishes to you
2007-02-18 20:27:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anissa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it should not stop you from enjoying a life with some one new. but if you only met her 2 weeks ago don't rush into it take it slow make sure that you truly love her. I know that it hurts when you lose someone but you have to take your time but if it feels like the right thing to do go for it you won't let anything stop you:) best of luck
2007-02-18 20:35:57 · answer #10 · answered by Megan R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My Mum died when she was just 34, she and my Dad had been together since they were teenagers and I know that he was devestated. But about 18 months later he met the woman who has now been his wife for 26 years and they have had two more children together.
I think its wonderful that you are moving on. Your first wife will always be with you, but I have no doubt that she would only want you to be happy and loved.
Congratulations
2007-02-18 20:27:23 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋