She is 9 and has 3rd degree burns on her arms & back. She is moody and wants hugs one minute and to be left alone the next. The fire was on 12/26/06, and the grandfather passed away on 1/26/07. I want to do the best I can for her. I truly don't understand what a NINE YEARS OLD could possibly be feeling right now?! I give her all the love I can; I just want to do EVERYTHING I can. thanks for any advice.
2007-02-18 17:11:36 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science ➔ Sociology
it was a house fire at the grandparent's home ~ the day after Christmas! A space heater caught a couch on fire in the living room and my girls and the grandparents were trapped in the home.
2007-02-18 17:20:52 · update #1
You sound like you are doing a great job trying to make her feel secure again. I do agree with therapy for both of you. It can only help. I just said a prayer for your family, God Bless and take care.
2007-02-21 14:32:41 · answer #1 · answered by bob 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The others have given good advice.
Both of you could use counseling. It's likely, though, that you'll both get through this okay even without.
In the meantime -- long-sleeved shirts, or sweaters. This will minimize the other kids staring at her in class.
Good luck.
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As for what a nine-year-old could be feeling -- she's missing her grandparents. She's having a nightmare of having to jump out a window to escape a fire! To some extent, she remembers the pain of the burning on her arms. Then, at school, she'll be noticing the people pointing at her and whispering, and talking about her, but not talking to her. She doesn't want to be a burn-victim all her life. She'll want to be a little girl with friends. It's going to be hard.
Be strong for her. There will be days when Mom will seem like her only friend in the world.
2007-02-19 01:32:58 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
she is nine years old and does not have the psychological defenses to understand death so easily, particularly if she was really close to him. She has to embrace the fact that grandpa is gone and is gone for good and that's nobody fault, will leave scarves? Yes it will, personally would be useful som profesional help, also let her express all the feelings she has related to him, wont be easy, wont be soon but it is necesary to get over it so, yes, ask for some help to make this the healthiest way.
2007-02-19 01:23:01 · answer #3 · answered by Gerardo G 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Family counseling would probably be a good idea. She is bound to have good and bad days. You have both been through a lot, and will need to talk about your fears, anxieties, and frustrations.
The social worker at the hospital where she was treated can probably recommend someone for you.
With professional help, and your love, you both will get through this. Good luck to you both.
2007-02-19 01:21:46 · answer #4 · answered by Chris S 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Probably everyone could use counseling at some point in there life. With some people counselling doesn't work. I would suggest that you look up some books on amazon.com about dealing with a young girl with injuries.
2007-02-19 01:17:54 · answer #5 · answered by Jane 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Check Shriner's hospital for support groups of parents of burn victims. I'm very sorry to hear about your daughter's tragedy. She will need counseling as the year's progress and the surgeries keep coming as she grows. Join a small group at your church as well so you can have people to confide in.
2007-02-19 01:15:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
she should be seeing a good child therapist. there are burn victim support groups for children as well. and you too so you can be better educated in helping her through this.
she is bound to be a mess from what she has been through and it is normal for her to need cuddling from you and then need time away. she is going through so much right now that she doesn't have the words to express it to you. she'll need help with that. when she says that she is fine or nothing is wrong - that's not it at all. there is... she just doesn't know how to express what she is feeling. a good therapist can help her with that.
good luck to you and your family. it will be a rough road ahead, but with the right help - you'll get through it.
2007-02-19 01:14:01 · answer #7 · answered by annie 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
You both need to go to counseling. You both have been through 2 traumatic experiences in less than 6 months. This will help you understand her and how to help her, and she can get help from the sessions as to what she needs and how to deal with with has happened to her.
2007-02-19 01:16:32 · answer #8 · answered by Sparkles 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You and your daughter need some help.
What a terrible thing to go through.
Call your General Practitioner and ask for some referrals to a counseling service.
Good luck.
2007-02-19 15:37:26 · answer #9 · answered by Croa 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It might surely be an idea. She has been pretty traumatized, not an easy thing for a young kid. Ask her straight out if she wants to talk, and if she says no, ask her if she would be more comfortable talking to someone else who will never ever share what she says.
2007-02-19 01:20:36 · answer #10 · answered by lexus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋