I have a boyfirend and we have a serious relationship but i can't accept that his dated was pregnant and aborted..that was happen a year ago before he met me, i know thats kinda ridicoulus if i can't accept that but still i can't accept his past.. i wanna move on
2007-02-18 14:11:39 · 18 answers · asked by Arisa W 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Maybe you should just be open and honest with your boyfriend. Talk to him and tell him how you really feel. Let him know that you are having trouble dealing with something that happened that is now a part of his past. Let him know what concerns you. If you really love him and want a relationship with him then you have to be completely honest with him or it will not work. If you want to move on, then tell him the truth on why you want to move on. Honesty is always the best route to take. Good luck with this situation.
2007-02-18 14:22:35 · answer #1 · answered by brendanorris2005 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
YOur English is rather confusing (was is "his dated"???) Is your complaint that you have a boyfirend who once got a girl pregnant, and that the girl had an abortion?????? and that you can't get past that?
Hon, what's to get past? Your boyfriend was an idiot to impregnate a girl before he was ready to be a father..... She was bright enough to figure out that she was not in a position to raise a child by herself. Abortion is legal. What is your problem? What is to get over?
Abortion is between a woman and her physician, not you, not him, not the government, and not the pharmacist... grow up.
2007-02-18 22:33:28 · answer #2 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are bringing this issue with him, how do you think he feels about it? Don't make it worse for him by bringing it up. In fact, don't bring up the past with him anymore, it ruins relationships like that.
If you are planning to be with this person for a long time, you need to accept him for who he is. But, if you can't accept him, then don't be with him. His past has nothing to do with you. So why bring it up. I don't think you will be a good wife if you keep focusing on his past, rather than focusing on your future with him. Yes, and this is ridiculous of the way you are thinking, and it is not fair to him either.
Don't be concerned about his past, be concerned of spending your life with him and how much you two can make a future together when you two get married and have your own family.
Remember, never bring up the past again! (smile)
2007-02-18 22:26:01 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you cannot accept his past, you should move on. It is a shame that you cannot get beyond it, but you can only do what you can do. If it is too much for you, that is the way it is.
Remember though, the past made him the person that you care about. We cannot change our pasts, but at least he didn't keep it from you either. He took a big risk letting you know about his past.
2007-02-18 22:29:37 · answer #4 · answered by kalea_kane 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
people say what happens in the past stays in the past, he didn't have to tell you but he did and that means he was honest with you. Just as hard as it is you have to understand there are heaps of reasons people do that personally i don't believe in abortions but some people don't have any other choice. If you love them and you want to make things work talk to him and let him know how you feel because if you let it eat you up that will interfere with your relationship and if you love him you have to try to make it work. You have to think for you and what he done in his past is different to what use do with your relationship because its use who are making the decisions no one else.
2007-02-18 22:19:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well I'm sure it was his G/F decision as well.
JUST DON'T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE.
It does sound a little irresponsible but mistakes happen. The question on my mind is did he breakup as a result of the pregnancy? It's not ridiculous in feeling the way you do. Somewhere in the back of your mind you must be thinking if I get pregnant will he leave me also.
2007-02-18 22:22:50 · answer #6 · answered by Johnny 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You have no right to his past just as he has no right to yours. It is exactly that, the past. Either you accept it or you don't. If you love him then it shouldn't matter and you will be able to let go of it. If you are unable to let go then you should let go of him because for some reason you don't accept him as he is. He cant change the past just as you cant. So, its up to you.
2007-02-18 22:18:03 · answer #7 · answered by kelstar 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Try to think of ether then that what els he's done for you. Just Be glad that your his and no one els. Theirs always a bad thing that we don't like about a person. But we just have to except that its just the way they are. And plus love is really hard to find.
2007-02-18 22:16:58 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to move on... I'm sure he didn't want that to happen, I mean who would? But seriously... you shouldn't care about that stuff, if you love him and its such a serious relationship, then it shouldn't mean anything, and besides... it wasnt HIS decision to get the abortion, and HE wasn't the one who GOT the abortion... so its not his fault... alrighty? good luck... =)
2007-02-18 22:17:43 · answer #9 · answered by alison p 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you cannot accept him and his past them move on and let him go. This is not fair to him or to you. Let him go and move on with your life and find someone who you can accept for them and their past.
2007-02-18 22:16:54 · answer #10 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋