how should i break it to my mom??

Question

My mom is always telling to me to not have sex!!!! me and my bf have been dating for over a year and we have had sex but i haven't told my mom that (we are 16)!!!!! she always tell me that i should tell her when we do but that that should be anytime soon!!!! i dont know how to tell her that i have!!!! i don't want her to be mad!!!! what should i do???

Answer 1

Either way your parents will be mad. If you just tell her though she will be happy with you. Make sure that your are using a birth control so you don't get pregnant because it make your life really hard. I am a teen parent. I figure that being open with your parents and they will learn to accept it.

Answer 2

ok this is a very sensative subject , well i would first let her know that i love her and want to be open with her because i respect and value her then i would say something like , well me and ?joe? have been together for about a year now and we both care for each other a lot and we just wanted to share that love for each other in a physical way and i just want you to know that he didnt force me into anything we both felt the same way and we were ready for that step so we did go thru with it and we still feel the same towards each other please dont be mad at me or think any less of me and i would hope that i can open and honest with you all the time.

I AM A MOM WITH A DAUGHTER AND IF SHE WERE GONNA TELL ME THAT SHE HAS HAD SEX I WOULD RATHER HER TELL ME THAT WAY AND I WOULD WANT TO HEAR ALL THE SAME THINGS THAT I SAID ABOVE, AS A MOM YOU DREAD THE DAY THAT YOUR DAUGHTER DECIDES TO GO ALL THE WAY BUT THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO BECAUSE EVERYONE GROWS UP SO AS LONG AS YOU PUT IT GENTLEY TO YOUR MOTHER IM SURE EVERYTHING WILL BE OK

THE BEST OF LUCK

Answer 3

I'm 34 now and I look back to the days when I was 16 and having sex. To tell you the truth- and most people say this too after they "grow up"- I didn't really know what I was doing, didn't really know what love was and having sex too young screwed me up as I got older. I mistakened sex for a lot of things. My mom would not want to know about the details and confiding may hurt her feelings but being honest with mom is probably best although your friends might tell you otherwise. She probably wants you to tell her so that you can be more prepared sexually, with protection. If you don't tell mom PLEASE PLEASE make sure you are on the pill AND using condoms. Good luck!

Answer 4

There is a reason your mother doesn't want you to have sex. You are 16! She loves you and wants you to fulfill your life before you have to settle down and have a family. Speaking from a mother's perspective (even though I have a one year old, my mentality has changed drastically since before I had children....), she may want you to go on birth control, be tested for any diseases, etc. She wants to know for a reason. We are all human, and being sexually attracted to someone is normal. You have to accept the fact that she will be mad. Get over it, grow up, and live and let live. She will be more mad and disappointed if you don't tell her and something happens, i.e.: getting pregnant, getting an std, etc...Just tell her. Good luck!

Answer 5

I am a mom, but be open and honest with your mom. Even though she told you to wait, your a teenager, we all make mistakes. I think as a mom we all try our best to protect our kids. It's just that we love our kids so much we forget that sometimes we have to remember that you grow up and you have your own lives to live. Another thing is when having sex at a young age there is so many things you need to think about, AIDS, HIV, and other diseases. We want you to be safe and live out your life thats all. Tell your mom, she will be hurt for a little bit, but she will be happy you told her. Remember communication is the key here.

Answer 6

You know, I like to think there is no one alive that will ever love me like my mom does. Some of us are not so lucky but being a mother myself and feeling what I do for my sons, I know it's true for them as well.
The beauty of a mothers love is that it is unconditional. My kids could be really ugly, stupid, clumsy, careless or hurtful and I will just go right on loving them.
The emotion you may witness when you tell your mom will be varied. It may be hurt - because you didn't share it with her sooner. Fear - that you may be hurting yourself or become pregnant. You know this will have an extreme effect on your life. She may feel anger. Anger at herself because she didn't teach you enough about what changes sex may bring to your life, didn't caution you enough. Fear that she failed you enough that you needed acceptance from someone else in this way because maybe she thinks thats why you did it.
You're right, she may be mad at herself or at you even. Who knows.
You never know, she may even feel relief, perhaps she saw it coming and now knows how to deal with it - put you on the pill or whatever.
The thing is, she will feel many things for who knows what reasons. Most of all, she will always feel love for you.
Trust in her.
The next time she brings it up, just let it go. She can be your best friend if you let her - that is, after she's gone around a couple times on the emotional roller coaster.
If you are going to have sex, make sure it's safe sex. Let her know you are being responsible (hopefully you are) so her mind can be put at ease.
Good luck.
.... and just so you know, being 16, or any age, is not a license to have sex.

Answer 7

well, i'm 17 and i am a virgin and when I start having sex, i probably wouldn't know how to tell my mom..., but no matter how you tell her, always be respectful and be mature about it. If you are not mature enough to be honest with your parents about sex, maybe you are too immature to be having sex. Sex is complicating and you need to have a good head on your shoulders in order to deal with the consequences. If you feel you are ready to have sex, you need to be ready to deal with the effects. I'm gonna tell you right now, if you tell them they may lose respect for you and they may not trust you..no matter what they say...suck it up if they get really upset about it, if they start yelling and screaming, just take it like an adult. You're having sex now, deal with it..you got yourself into that mess, you can get yourself out..remember be safe when you have sex, cause sex can last for only a few minutes, but std's or having a baby will last a lifetime..take care and please be mature...you're too young to be stressing about this, be a teen, do what teens do, enjoy not having responsibilities, because they are overwhelming..

Answer 8

im am a mother to a 16 year old and i have always told her to talk to me about those things, i know kids are scared because they dont want to get in trouble but we love you and we want to keep you safe and we would rather know so we can help you make decisions that a 16 year old sometimes cant make . its very hard to raise a child at 16(i did ) so your mom im sure wants to make sure you are protected from that and diseases . 16 year olds are naive to the world and really need the guidance of thier parents ,and telling her will show your mom that you have matured enough to be honest with her and yourself about these things .maybe she wont be as mad as you think she will , and just maybe she will be relieved you did discuss it with her .it will show her you do have intentions of being honest with her. good luck

Answer 9

It´s always better to tell even if you´re not sure how they´ll react...
even if you have a good or not so good relationsip with your mom you should tell her because she´s the one that will be able to help you if something is realy worrying you....remembre o use birth control and also to visit your doctor regularly.
She might get mad at you but i´ll be better than lying all the time and mixing up our mind because you haven´t told her.
You´ll sleep better, believe me.

Answer 10

The sooner you tell your mom the better! Shes going to be mad with you when ever u tell her because u are her little girl! believe me I'm 15 and lost mine when i was 14 my dad found out the hard way! But just tell her u guys need to talk one day after school or something. And you should go to the gyno. just to be on the safe side(it's not all that bad)!
GOOD LUCK!
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