How long do you give your marriage?

Question

How long should you continue to try and make your marriage work, if both of you are unhappy how long before you go your seperate ways?
We do have a 2 year old to consider

Answer 1

I am going through a divorce at the moment, with two children in their teens. There is never an easy time to do this as i have found out. But if you honestly know in your heart that your love has gone for your partner then you will be staying for all the wronge reasons. Your child is young enough not to understnad and this is much better than having teens who do understnad. It is very hard to tell them about lost love, and i know for me i am hurting everyone around me, but i have lasted for 7 years feeling this way and i had to stop lying to myself and everyone else around me.Just make sure that it is really what you want, and you will know this in your heart.

Answer 2

In this world of disposables, marriage should not be one of them!!! You have brought a beautiful child into this world together so somewhere there is love between you! Marriage is not always roses, dinners out and hugs. Sometimes it is cleaning the smelly clothes, wiping a running nose and taking out the garbage. It is also not letting all the crap that this world dishes out interfere with what brought you together in the first place. If you are unhappy seek help to get happy again . Talk to each other when you have the time to talk about what is bothering with you ... Work together on the difficulties... If this doesn't work, try again, or go to a counsellor. Keep trying !!
As to how long I give my marriage... I hope my lifetime!!

Answer 3

It really depends on a lot of things. My dear brother told me once that he rates his marriage on a percentage basis. That is, if its 60/40 okay then he is okay. If it dips below that i.e. to say, 30/70 against for a period of 3 months, he works at it. So far, he claims he can get it to a 90/10 for with a bit of effort! Can I suggest that instead of using all your energy to condemn your marriage, that you use it to build it back up. Can you remember why you liked each other in the first place. Sometimes, its good plan to pick an evening and run through how you met, your first dates, and just talk about it affectionately. Its just a thought but you may well be surprised what you find out! And yes, its worth trying over and over because that's what its all about in the end. Only violence and adultery are good reasons to finish it. Oh, and someone trying to control the other.

Answer 4

I've been married 18 years and am still happy and 'in love' with my husband. we have had our ups and downs like any couple.

All marriages have bad times. Why has yours been so bad? How long has it been unhappy? Do you both talk about it? have you considered counselling (marriage guidance).
You have a daughter so is it worth trying to make things work?
Do you want your marriage to work? Are you still in love?

If there really is nothing left and counselling does not work then maybe you should consider parting. I don't believe in staying together for the kids sake BUT I think it's worth trying to save your marriage isn't it?

Answer 5

when you both were at the alter, remember you both vowed to each other to stay married till death do part, sickness or health, joy or sadness, poverty or wealth. The Bible says when you are join together, it is forever, never to part, if you put away your wife, you are commiting sin.You must understand that marriage is a lifetime contract, not a dollyhouse that you can just walk away from, considering you have a 2yr old involved. how do you expect that child to grow with you and your wife separated, hmm? now, you guys make it work by doing something more spicey, and do things a little different, and most of all, Get down on your knees and pray to God for divine help to save your marriage!

Answer 6

It depends on what the problem is and what you are willing to do to resolve it. It's not about time, it's about effort. What have you done so far to resolve your differences?

Marriage is a committment. It take effort from both partners to be successful. Successful does not mean you will be happy 100% of the time. It means you are willing to work through your problems, compromise and accept a workable solution.
If you agreed to bring a child into the world, you have already invested a great deal in the relationship and you should not give up on it so easily.
I suggest you see a marriage counselor.

Answer 7

Sometimes, letting go seems like the easiest thing to do. But think about this: you've invested so much of your time and energy into another person; you've made a solemn promise; and you still know there's love, even if it's hiding underneath the surface. This website will show you how to save a marriage and avoid divorce, even if you're the only one trying https://tr.im/CjR6l

Answer 8

I think giving a shot at counseling might help and solve some of your issues. If that doesn't work then its best to seperate earlier in the child's development. The older the child gets, the more it understands and will have a harder time coping.

Answer 9

I think this is really a personal issue to be resolved within your family and the most important person of all is your child,just think of the long term effect this will have on him/her and the potential psychological damage they could suffer if you split,is it worth doing something now that you may regret the rest of your life? you must have loved your spose when you wed so why not try and resolve things and re-kindle that love you never really lost,we all go through bad times,ive been married for 25 years sure weve had bad times but always stayed together and yes it does get better with time.
My parents split and abandoned me and even now it still hurts,so think about it is it really worth the long term effects?

Answer 10

you should try as long as your heart tells you too, if neither of you are happy in your marriage your 2 year old will pick up on it and be unhappy too