What would you do if?

Question

Ok. My mom is igiving me to my grandma. She says she is because she is to young to take care of me I'm 14 and she's 31.
She's always saying that I'm a b i t c h and a loser. She also siad she was getting rid of me because when she was sick I always went to my friend's house and didn't care about her. But everytime was about to leave I would ask her "Mom are you sure you want me to go"? I don't understand? Well anyway she calls me a loser because I left her. I feel bad that I did that and I should've stayed with her. Oh yea and she said she quit school and it's all my fault and that by doing that I made her loose 3,000 dollars. When she calls me a loser I always feel bad. She said any kid who has betrayed their parent like that is a loser and your not going to amount to anything. And she also said I was a mistake!
So now I'm going to my gramas house and going to a bad schol and High School. I need advice thanks!

Answer 1

Its not right for her to be calling you those names. She needs help. Ask her if she wants to go see a shrink because you think she should. Explain to her that you love her. Its probably the best thing for you to go and reside with your grandmother right now because maybe your mom is going through some rough times and she needs to work it out. Secondly, it is not your fault that she dropped out of her school, she's the one who chose to get pregnant not you.. its her fault not yours. Things will get better sweety, I don't think she means any of the things she says, she is probably depressed.

Answer 2

First of all, You are NOT a loser your so called mother is! She is definitely immature. Look at this as a blessing. The decisions that she made regarding quitting school are just that HER'S. She alone is responsible for her choices. You are not responsible for taking care of her quite the opposite, she as the parent should have taken care of you. She is lashing out at you for her own short comings.
How could you have possibly made her lose 3 grand?

Anyway, yes you will be going to a new school, and that does suck. However, you also will have new opportunities and new friends. You have a great chance of getting away from all the negativity of your mom. That alone will be a benefit. You will leave your friends from your old school, but you can call, e-mail, IM, text. As a benefit it is almost like having old and new friends at once! Not a bad thing. I think you will be fine. Just remember, that your mom may be immature, but you can rise above that and when you become successful, you can tell her to go to H*ll..

Good Luck

Answer 3

well first of all your mom is wrong, she isn't to young to take care of you, if she could take care of you when she was 17, then at age 31 she should be an expert and I think it is really cruel of her to be leaving you. Your mom probably does need help, but I mean spciolgical help it is really mean to swear at your daughter and even more saying you are a big mistake.Plus it was her desision to drop out of school wasn't it? maybe you should go live with your grandma for a while and the go back after a year or something and see how things go or your grandma could come live at your house for a while so you don't have to switch schools. good luck I'm so sorry your mom is treating you so unfairly I hope everything works out!

Answer 4

Be happy that you are going to your grandmas. This is a new start for you , school, friends, and a new relationship with your mom. Whatever your mom says about you put it in one ear and out the other. Your mom will wake up one day and realized she has made a big mistake and when she does dont give her a hard time unless she dont have nothing to do with you. Well wish you luck on everything.

Answer 5

Your MOM made the choice to have you and nothing is your fault. It is sad that she is 31 and is now saying that she can't take care of you. This was her choice and maybe it would have been better for her to give you up for adoption in the beginning. Your mom is no kind of woman if she is giving up on you now. She is a coward and you don't deserve to be treated that way. Be happy that u are getting away and won't have to suffer verbal abuse anymore. I am sorry u are going through this and its not fair to you. You were arbitrarily brought into this world...meaning u did not have a choice and that is so not fair to you at all.

Answer 6

#1 YOU ASRE NOT A LOSER and your mom has no RIGHT to say the things she is saying to you BECAUSE she is feeling sorry for herself and wants someone to feel sorry for her. You did NOY help GET HER PREGNANT. SHe is being VERY SHELFISH and acting like a child--------GO to Grandmas and do well in school and you willbe fine. Just because the school may not be one of the best ones around does not mean it is a bad school. You will meet new friends. Your mom has CHOSEN the LIFE she wants to live and right now you will be much better off to not be in the same housde with her. Your mom is taking it out on you because she feels if she makes you feel bad then it will make her forget how SHE IS THE SCREWUP>

Answer 7

Your mother is emotionally abusive. She shouldn't blame you for mistakes that she made or problems in her own life, and when she does, you can't let yourself feel guilty about it. None of this is your fault. When she starts in on you, just tune her out, and don't respond to anything she says. (This is what I do--my mom is the same way).
As long as your grandma treats you better, you will be much better off with her. Be happy that you get to go live in a better environment. Unless of course, it isn't a better environment, in which case you need to talk to an adult you trust, like one of your friends' parents or a teacher or counselor at school, and hopefully they can help you find a better place to live. You should talk to your school counselor anyway so you can get help to not feel so guilty about things that aren't your fault and so your self-esteem can recover from the way your mother's treated you.

Answer 8

tell ur mom that ur not a loser....she just is 4 thinkin u r!! it actually sounds like u would b better off at ur g-mas...but if u want 2 stay w/ ur mom then tell her that ur stayin there.....and 31 isnt young 2 have a child...ppl in the 1800's had kids when they were 16! and hat was the average age 4 ppl 2 have kids! tell ur mom that she needs 2 calm down a bit and just deal with u....it isnt right 4 some1 2 give up her child...that is just bad parenting....tell her she is 100% able to take care of u...and tell her it makes u feel guilty when she calls u names...and say ur sorry 4 leavin her when she was sick....

Answer 9

I'm ur age and i was given to my aunt when i was 3 basically. But the difference is I go to a good school. I believe if i would have stayed with my mom my talents would not have been discovered and she would have hurt me emotionally just like ur mom. your mom is blaming you for her mistakes, she could have worked hard and went to school to she just took the easy way out by blaming you. And you are not a looser, you just are the kid that she brought into this world and wasnt able to take care of. One day she will realize that she was wrong and she'll feel bad for missing out on all the wonderful moments your grandmother gets to see. It's her loss

Answer 10

You have to know that your mother is the one with a problem and not you. She sounds like she has no confidence, little self-esteem and blames you for how her life has turned out. She cannot accept the fact that she has done this to herself and it's just easier to blame others.
Living a your Grandma's is probably the best thing for you. The way she speaks to you and attacking your self-esteem and self-worth is not acceptable. No Mother should ever talk ill of a child they claim to love, if anything they would say and do anything to bring their self esteem up. What she is doing is harmful and will only become worse if you go back. Look after yourself and enjoy your life as a care free teen. Show her that her behavior is not acceptable or wanted, if she wishes to have any kind of relationship she needs to seek help for herself.
Always remember, a mother is there to love unconditionally and should always be there to lift you up and not cut you down.
I had a son when I was nineteen and with all the ups and downs I would never talk ill of him and would never blame him for how my life has turned out.