My friends daughter is a victim of domestic violence and he hit her last nite she dont want cops in because...

Question

she does not want cops involved because he is a gangster and she is afraid that she will put those that she loves in danger. She is moved out of the boyfriends house but he seems to have her under a power. she says that it was some her fault because she was mad at him when she found out he was using drugs. that is when he hit her. she then left. she is embarrassed and dont want to get alot of people involved but her dad who is my friend had me help move her. what can we do to help this poor broken girl. my heart just broke when she said that she feels worthless now. she is a very beautiful girl inside and out but he had her convinced that she was not. never he gave her compliments, nothing. he did not allow her to buy things for the house only him. pictures/wall things he would buy what he wanted and hang. same with the food. he was so controlling that he took this poor girl and put her under his thumb for everything. what can we all do as her friends to help her get thru this.

Answer 1

She hasn't hit rock bottom yet. She still tries to bail out her boyfriend. She still has excuses for not calling the cops on him. She still takes the blame that it was her fault.

Until she reaches the point to a decision to not bail her boyfriend out, such as call the police when she caught her boyfriend doing drug. Until she made the decision that she is not going to take the blames, there is nothing you really can do. All I can suggest, from my past co-worker experience is to get a real professional help as he did for his daughter which got her out of the mess.

Answer 2

Get her some psychological counseling. That may be the first step. Move if she has to (further than just out of the place they shared).
I don't know enough about "gangsters" to say whether they are likely to follow through, but she does really need to make contact with the police. If not on domestic violence, give them enough info for them to get him on drug trafficking.
She needs counseling to help her LEARN HOW NOT TO CHOOSE THIS KIND OF PERSON TO BE WITH AGAIN. Otherwise the cycle will just continue, and the next one, or the one after that may just kill her.

Answer 3

I have no clue but I am gonna try to help, This is a very rare and dangerous situation. The only thing I could think is moving and I doubt they would do that...But if they do NO WARNING the gangsters that their moving do it late at night so they don't know..Thats all the advice I can give -Good Luck!
JJ

Answer 4

First, make sure she doesn't go back! If she was with him long enough for him to convince her she is worthless, then she needs counselling immediately. She also needs her friends and family to stand by her and give her the support an love she needs so she doesn't go back to this man. This will not happen overnight. But, with counselling and support from loved ones, she will heal. Is she or was she religious? Going to church could help her a lot and she can get counselling there if she doesn't want to go elsewhere.

Answer 5

As little ones becoming up my brother and that i've got been subjected to prevalent beatings from our mom ought to we do something incorrect or p*ss her off in any way. My father grow to be no longer attentive to what grow to be happening till one evening my brother had an epilectic greater wholesome and grow to be taken to scientific institution the place nurses observed the bruises over his lower back. We have been too youthful to appreciate the way and why 'melancholy' can impact human beings in different procedures yet as i'm now a resposible person myself I even have taken great steps to ensure that my 2 sons have been by no ability subjected to what I had to bear.

Answer 6

She really needs to get out of town if at possible, just for a little while to regroup and have an opportunity to experience a different life. She also needs to get in touch with a domestic violence crisis counselor who can let her know of the various help resources that they have. As for her family and friends, they also may need to talk to the crisis counselor to find out what they can do to encourage her until she gets a level of internal strength and confidence back in herself. My prayers are definitely with all of you.

Answer 7

Yes if he is a gangster then she does have allot to worry about. The best thing for her to do is just leave him, maybe when hes not at home or something like that. It wont be easy especially since her self-esteem is so low,poor thing. Good luck.

Answer 8

She really has two options.

One take a batt to him and beat him like he would beat her or will beat her cause you KNOW it will get that at one time or another.

Beat him with that batt and he will be to embarrassed to tell anyone cause it was done by a girl.

OR LEAVE STATE.. Can she and does she have the means. Find someone, a friend or family that will take her in that lives FAR FAR away, and tell no one. So he can not come find her.

Good Luck.

Answer 9

she sounds very abused. and friends and family, just comfort her. she really should see a counsellor, to help her work through her issues and find her self-worth. maybe offer to go with her to talk to someone. if she fears to call the police, there are no worries with that. if she simply explains to them that she fears the safety of her family, then they will find a way to protect them. gangster or not, no one has the right to make someone fear them.

she is going to need to report it to the police. she clearly has an attachment to this guy, but once he is arrested, she will experience life away from him, and realize she is better than this. once she can get into counselling, she can work through it, and get back to the old, beautiful girl she used to be.

Answer 10

well you can put her in a protective home but you don't want your family in danger so the only thing she can do is move to a other state but she did learn from her mistake going out with that type of guy that is bad in the first place all you see is trouble from that type of guy