my son is 16 and being?

Question

my son is 16 and just got his license now he acts like he is "The Man" i gave him my car so i dont have one now and he is getting so controlling in our state we have a law that teens can not have friends in there car for the first 6 months they have there license they can only drive with emendate family but my son got caught driving his friends and girlfriend around so i took away the keys he is not allowed to drive for a month if he had been pulled over her would have gotten a $150 ticket that i would have had to pay for and i pay his insurance

he says im being unfair that a month is to long but i dont think it is am i being unfair ? considering he is being disrespectful and mouthy to me sense he got his license

he knew the rules my kids never get responsability with out rules and consaquenses

he does work we have a store he works there 20 a hours a week for free to help out the family and pay for his licence, gas and his cell phone i believe nothing in life is free

Answer 1

1.) Your son
2.) Your car
3.) Your house
4.) Your money paying for the car/car insurance
5.) YOUR RULES

If he were my son, and he continued to be that blatantly disrespectful, he'd be spending more than a month without the keys. Until he can learn to show respect for you in general, as well as respect for your rules and the law, then he can ride a bike or walk. Simple as that.

Answer 2

Tell him this.....He's having a great day...new licence,got the car keys and the car...He goes to his girlfriends house picks her up and a few friends...I mean whats the diffrence between now and 6 months right?The catch a movie,grab somthing to eat...One light away from his girlfriends house...He goes to switch lanes and BAM! a truck smashes in the side of the car all because he forgot to check his mirrors while before he turned to tell his girlfriend somthing....So the car is totaled...He's in shock...He instantly knows how much trouble hes in....He turns to make sure everyone is ok...Everyone his except his best friend who was in the passernger seat.He's dead.
I know as a mother this is the last thing you want to hear,and the last thing your son thinks can happen to him...Well I was the girlfriend in that car.And I want to tell your son it can happen.We had the very same law in our state.He had his drivers licence for 3 weeks,and now he doesnt know if he will ever get it back.The family did press charges.Hes needs to realize that just because you passed the test doesnt mean you are used to the road.6 months is a good time limit so that he can become familer with driving in diffrnet road conditions,in diffrent traffic situations,and make sure he has the motions down pat for thing like changing lanes stopping and going for red lights..Everytime you get in your car you face somthing new...Its enough that you can be at risk by your actions,you dont need to put others in that situation.I hope you let him read this,and it changes his mind about bbringing along friends.Sure you could go all over the state and nothing could happen....But then again somthing might.Do you and your friends a favor,and wait...Its not that long..and having your life is much cooler than having your divers licence.For me its been 5 years,im 21 now,and that was still the most horrible day of my life..its somthing you never get over.Please,be safe.

And to answer your question mom...A month is a good choice.Really he's getting off easy.I would suggest setting up a time each day for you and him to drive,and that being the only time he gets the car keys,until you feel he wont do this again.I wish you both the best of luck!

Answer 3

I think your being a good mom!

He disrespected your authority, and now he needs to be punished. I would make him get a job, as well as taking the keys away from him.

Tell him he can only drive your vehicle if he pays for some of the insurance and the gas when he uses it. So that way your not doing so much. Make him have the responsibility. If he doesn't like it, then he don't get a car to use. Encourage him to save some of his money so he can start working toward buying his own car.

But, good for you finally a mom that knows how to put her foot down!

Answer 4

you are not being unfair. having a car is a privilege not a necessity. if he doesn't like one month, if it would have been me, i would have said "good, then let's make it two months." then he would have been glad to have a month. you are doing the right thing and you need to get a pat on the back for doing so. so many things can happen out there on the road and teens are far more likely to have an accident with friends in the car than if they are there by themselves because their friends pass as a distraction. keep on doing what you are doing. it is not wrong or unfair. what would show him more responsibility would be if he had to work to pay the insurance and gas and things like this. when a teenager has to pay for something, they appreciate it even more. hope this helps. good luck.

Answer 5

I wouldnt have given him the car to drive in the first place
but
as you have i think you are doing the right thing, and even then i wouldnt let him use the car all the time
he is a 16 year old boy so is being a show off which is normal

When you give him the keys back tell him he can only use the car on certain days

Answer 6

That isn't unfair. He should EARN the his way to being able to use the car. You should set some rules for him, so if he breaks any of these rules, he knows that he'll get the car taken away. Won't come as a surprise or anything.

Answer 7

Thats nice. You lend him your car, and in return you get disrespect. You had no option but to take away the keys in my opinion. Leaving him with the keys just sends the wrong message, and he will disrespect you more. The best thing he can do is to get a job. It will teach him the meaning of responsibility. Then he can buy his own car.

Answer 8

No it was not unfair. Maybe when he is able to start driving again he might show some respect. Also why did you give him your keys? He needs to be responsible and buy his own car. If he works for it he will appreciate it more

Answer 9

I don't think you're being unfair. Infact I don't think you could be anymore just. He should be more mature and responsible. The mouthy stuff however are nothing. I'm 15 and when my mother punishes me, I get mad and I do say rude things to her, only to regret what I said later. I'm sure your son feels the same way!

Answer 10

You know you need to put in some ponctuation sometimes, it was very hard for me to read.

But look, my brother got tickets for speeding, Once because he was at 129 and the other he was at 85. lost 4 points, now thay are taking away his license for 3 months. Tell him one month is nothing compared to what the cops would do to him.