2007-02-17 22:23:07 · 19 answers · asked by msslyn17 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
you can never trust him again
2007-02-17 22:27:49 · answer #1 · answered by david UK 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you want the truth or do you want to hear what you want to hear?
If you're wanting the truth, then here it is:
Unfortunately, you've been betrayed. Despite the fact that he may tell you he'll never do it again, the fact remains is that one time is one time too many. Even if he never actually does it again, the thought and urge can easily come back to him.
Don't let this become some drama laced high school situation. Confront him, tell him what you know (facts only) and then leave him. Though he's done you wrong, he still deserves to know why you're leaving. I'm sorry you had to go through with this, but it's now time that you take this as a life lesson (sadly a crappy one) and move on with your life. I know the idea is a hard one to swallow, but if you do not, you will only be setting yourself up to be in a miserable relationship. Would you rather be miserable on your own and one day wake up feeling like a new person or would you rather continue to be in a miserable relationship that never changes? The end result is up to you, but if you want to ensure that this doesn't ruin a possible future for yourself, then I think you need to cut your ties and do your best to start over.
I wish you the very best!
2007-02-18 06:39:16 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look. Do really deserve a man that cheats on you? All over this world there are good men and if your husband is a liar let him be no girl really likes a liar right? You should not forgive him c'mon think he may be going out to clubs with girls do you really think that if i gets in a affair once he wont do it again? of course he will. You need to find a better men that you deserve and you should really think about who you call your husband
2007-02-18 06:31:59 · answer #3 · answered by sandra a 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your absolutely sure about this then you have to decide what you want to do. Once you make that decision you have to live with it.
If you threaten him with a divorce, he might jump at it. If you kick him out, you might push him into the other girls arms. Be careful is what I mean. What do you want to do, the ball is in your court now.
If you love the jerk and wouldn't want to continue life without him, then you'll have to sit down and have a long talk with him. Find out what made him look at another girl. Maybe it's your fault in a long run, maybe he's just being a jerk. Find out and try to correct the situation. Remember the only other choice is divorce. Four out of five people, after a few years, wish they'd never divorced but, gave the partner another chance.
2007-02-18 06:31:38 · answer #4 · answered by cowboydoc 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If it was a one time thing, you need to decide if you can forgive that and if you honestly think your relationship can survive it (if that's even what you want). If he came to you and admitted what he did, was completely honest about everything, and asked your forgiveness...who knows? Maybe it was a single (awful) momentary lapse in judgement on his behalf. But if you found out through the grape vine or if he's not fessing up to it, you've got yourself an untrustworthy man.
If he has been carrying on a relationship of any kind with this other woman, you've already lost him and it sounds like you're better off without him.
Either way, listen to your heart and look out for yourself. Don't settle for a someone who isn't worthy of you!
2007-02-18 08:00:30 · answer #5 · answered by OhKatie! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you think you can forgive and forget, then do so. I doubt he will stop cheating.He'll promise to stop and say he's sorry until next time he's caught. Best bet, make the SOB pay, get a lawyer and divorce him and then he can play all he wants with whatever leftover money he'll have you and your lawyer clean his butt up, He violated your marriage vows. He doesn't Love or respect you. I'm sorry that he is doing this to you.
2007-02-18 06:37:53 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
first of all the fact that he having affair with a girl and not with girl its already good:). i understand your pain but i don't think you should do something drastic. men cheat its biological fact i had women that i would ready to loose my life for them and still i was cheating. what you should ask yourself its not if he do it again? because he will.
you should ask yourself can you trust him to help you when you need help? is he put smile on your lips when you sad? are you important to him? if the answer is yes you should keep him if not his loyalty is not relevant . he is not good for you any way
2007-02-18 06:37:00 · answer #7 · answered by Yevgeni Y 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you seriously unsure what you should do? OK, then let me spell it out for you. Change the locks on your house, transfer all the money in your joint accounts into accounts that only you have access to, get tested for STDs, get a lawyer. In that order.
2007-02-18 06:27:02 · answer #8 · answered by Liz 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Only you can figure out what to do. We only ask for advice when we already know what to do, but are scared to do it or need assurance.
You are going to get nothing but conflicting advice, this needs to be your decision and no one else's. It is your life and YOU need to decide what you want or don't want.
2007-02-18 10:45:28 · answer #9 · answered by Krispy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, welcome to the club hon- I found out about my wife two days ago and now I'm living with my friend. Move out - tell the guy to go fly a kite
2007-02-18 06:27:31 · answer #10 · answered by Zach F 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In my personal experience; once a cheat, always a cheat. Dump him now.
2007-02-18 06:30:41 · answer #11 · answered by Patti C 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋