Do your ideas about how things should be, or could be, ever interfere with how things are?

Question

i.e. relationships, family, job satisfaction, etc. If so, what can we do about it?

Answer 1

Yes, my wish for a more ideal world sometimes interferes with my thinking. I get angry when things don't go as perfectly as they should, then something or somebody has to snap me back to reality. To some extent, I think this sort of thing happens to most of us from time to time.

Answer 2

Definitely.

One of my friends is a real perfectionist, and when things don't turn out exactly how he imagines them, i.e. 100% perfect, he throws a strop and what was originally olny ruined for him then becomes ruined for everybody. So his statement becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy.

In reality, his perfect is way beyond what most people would do, and the 95% he achieves, which he calls ruined is still above and beyond the call of duty.

He also suffers from moving goalpost syndrom, in that he decides what he wants to achieve, and before he gets there sets himself a more difficult target. This way he manages to achieve his original goals without realising it, and is constantly disappointed that he never gets where he wants to be, in the time he demands, when in fact he's already there - but his achievement is ruined by his attitude.

Fortunately, I picked up some tips from a book I read recently, and am on the road to providing some fixes.

Answer 3

I never had a great childhood, this I could not control. No matter what happened when I was a kid, my Dad always taught me that I could change my life beyond that. Including my future, my familys' future... it was all up to me. He taught me that even with his support, which he has always given me, the direction of my future and my sucsesses was in my hands. Relationships, jobs and etc!
WE have the knowledge and the strength to change the course of our own lives as long as we have the willpower to do it. This applies to our own lives and the responsibility to the Earth as well.
We have the knowledge and the resources to change the course of our kids future and our Grandkids' future as long as we have the willpower to apply it.
We all know what we have to do to make our lives better, but nobody wants to make the effort to actually do it!!!!

Answer 4

Yes I think they do. Your reaction to events will determine somewhat how things turn out.

A saying which is one of my favourites goes like this:
I am responsible for my attitude.
My attitude determines my actions.

Therefore I believe that our attitude plays an immensly important part to the events around us.

Answer 5

Everything comes like it comes.
If forcing things it might not turn out the right way.