Can anyone relate to my ex, I am asking this b/c he was avery loving and caring bf, HOWEVER, he suffered from?

Question

depression and even felt suicidal often. He wanted me to help so I did. But to complicate matters, he had a child w/ some girl he met once (one night stand). He wanted nothing to do w/ the situation, but I helped him come to terms with it, only for him to leave me for the mother of his child. Whats worst was he was so cold and mean. Does he not realize what he put me through? He told me I was everything he ever wanted. Then he treats me like garbage. We are both from decent families and are educated. He's a teacher. This girl is 23, no job, no college education, and got very involved in our relationship. Anyhow, they are not together, b/c he realized she was not all there. But he has never once sincerely apologized to me. He did tell me everything that happened was uncalled for. But he does not even want to talk to me anymore. I know he does not deserve me. But can someone explain to me why he is this way. Normally some people regret the things they do, I would imagine especially

after I helped him w/ those night he wanted to "die". He changed from day to night. We were together for 2yrs, always respected each other. But when he did this, I cried to him alot and yelled at him, which is natural I guess. He showed no sympathy for me:(( CAn anyone relate to him??I want to understand because I was left with much confusion and sadness.

Answer 1

I can relate to your situation except that my ex-boyfriend didn't suffer from depression. I helped him get out of debt and every time he needed something I was right there for him. When he was upset about something that happen I was there to hear him and comfort him. We were together for 11 years and he left me for another woman. He would have an argument with her and run right back to me and like an idiot I would let him come back. This happened for about two years and then I wouldn't let him come back. It was driving me crazy. I couldn't eat or sleep. He kept saying that he was in love with me, and he was confused. He didn't know what he wanted in life. I told him at his age he should know by now what he wanted. Any way it took me a very long time to get over him and when I did I was able to forgive him and go on with my life. We are very good friends now and I would never let him back into my life for a relationship. She broke up with him and six months later she got married to another man and he now has no one.
Some men do not know how to say I am sorry, so don't expect that from your ex. He probably does regret what he has done to you but is embarrassed to tell you. Men won't tell a woman their true feelings. And you are right, HE DOES NOT DESERVE YOU. It appears that men can't handle a great and good woman, they think the grass is greener on the other side, but they find out quick it isn't. Just remember a man don't miss his water until his well has gone dried. So girl, forget him and get on with your life. You do deserve better. Good luck to you.

Answer 2

Something my mother told me a long time ago....never give more to a person than you can afford to lose!!!!
Ok----you did the right thing...you helped him through hardship. In a big way. But you did that out of the kindness of your heart. That only means that you are a good person. Sometimes...I think we are brought to meet people for the sake of personal gifts. Your gift to him was to see another light...a life worth living...a child worth rearing. And that is a good thing!!! His gift to you....you know what and what you won't accept from a future relationship. You now know that your capacity for compassion is immeasurable. You had a hard time learning this lesson...but it is your strength now...and no one can ever take it from you. He is the way he is ...because he is probably chemically imbalanced...and you can't fix that!!! Time to gather your strengths and move on to a new chapter!!! You seem like a good woman...keep on...never look at your past with regret...always find your greatness through your challenges and tears...this is what makes you grow wise!!!

Answer 3

He was very selfish. You gave of yourself and he took it. I think he was just using you for stability of sorts when he was depressed and when he thought he could find that with an instant "family" he took off. He is too self centered to realize how deeply he hurt you , so he hasn't apologized. You will have to be strong and get over him. He was sick and he used you and you have to move on.