ok i really need help!?

Question

ok my friend needs help and i really want to help him but i dont no wat to do! his parents hit and abuse him. his grades are dropping horribly.
hes depressed. his parents give all the attention to his older brother who is deaf.he says he cant call the abuse hot line because his parents still provide him with food, shelter, and "love". i dont no how to help him. HELP!

Answer 1

oh dear your friend needs a proper friend now who's gonna look out for him and do whats right for him and because his so called parents provide food and shelter does not mean he has to be there personal punch bag x

Answer 2

If he's being hit and abused but still says he's getting love, then there is something not matching up here. He may want the food and the shelter and he may be feeling more love FOR them than FROM them. But all this would come out if he was talking to the right person; maybe he also thinks a person on an abuse hot line is not the right person. Maybe he's not telling you everything, either, or exaggerating. Hard to tell.
Since his grades are dropping, maybe he should be talking to a guidance counselor at school. But also, you could talk to a guidance counselor at school, too. You could either go with him or go separately. A therapist would be the best person but guidance counselors can give you recommendations about that.

Answer 3

One of my best friends lived in a situation similar to that, except his parents hated on him and treated his two younger brothers like angels. I can still remember running over to his house to throw food in his backyard so he could sneak out at night any eat. My boyfriends mum used to buy him clothes all the time. All of his friends used to chip in and buy him batteries for a CD player we bought him (cause music was his refuge). He refused to do anything about his situation though. When he turned 17, he said f*ck this and ran away to my house. He talked to the school counciller and his parents were put under a watch by children's aid. When they went to investigate the actually REFUSED to have CAS come into their house. After a year of living with me and my boyfriend (6 months each place), he reconcilled with his family and moved back in an odd twist of events.

In the end, we watched it happen for 3 years before he did anything. He just wouldn't. I think the best thing you can do for him is encourage him to get help. A lot of the time, though, being with your abusive parents might actually be better than being in the foster system. If you are 16 or over in Ontario, you can't get into the foster system and will be forced to live in a shelter which is only open 6pm until 8am daily (including weekends and during the winter).

Try getting a guidence appointment and taking him down with you. Once you get there, ask him to talk and leave. See if anything happens. If he talks, at least he is a step closer and it will allow the guidence councillor to be aware that there is SOMETHING he should be talking about (they will keep a closer eye on him).

I hope things work out for him...

Answer 4

Call the abuse hotline anyway. If there is hitting going on it's abuse. Get an older adult involved. Tape the hitting and get evidence. No one should have to live with being hurt. Hitting is NOT love. It is Abuse. It can only get worse. If you care for this person get him help. It takes a whole community to raise a child and it might take a whole community to help a child.

Answer 5

Call an abuse reporting hotline on his behalf. You can do this without giving them your name and they have to check it out within 24-48 hours. Providing food and shelter isn't all that a child needs to be healthy.

Answer 6

food shelter and love do not outweigh them hitting him i don't understand what is preventing him from calling the help hotline being a parents means taking care of your children and that means not hitting or abusing its against the law urge him to tell someone athoratative a teacher whoever or maybe mention to your teacher its your friend but you can;t say who he/she should be able to figure out who and you will not have told

Answer 7

well this is a very serious problem. and just because there giving him food don't mean hes not being abused. if there beating him with no reason he should call and if he don't want to leave just to talk to the people on the hot-line... but he needs help before it gets worse.

Answer 8

they might provide him with food and shelter but they are not providing him with love and respect. I would encourage him to tell someone. No one deserves to be treated that way and he has to be the one to put an end to it. If he tells, he did the right thing.

Answer 9

You call the abuse hotline yourself. You don't have to give your name, but you do have to report this. Your friend is in a situation where he doesn't feel safe reaching out for help, but he needs help anyway. You've got to make the call! Do it right now, please.

Answer 10

Report it to the school. if the school sees that he is being abused they will do something about it. encourage your friend to report it because he doesn't deserve to be abused. its not right for him to be abused and its worse for him to allow that to happen. he must do it soon before it gets worse.