hey guys ...here is the thing...i'm a 19 years old girl who lives in a middle eastren country and once i was online and i've chatted with this guy who is from another middle eastren county infact his country is next to mine...any way we started as friends and weird stuff have happened...u may not belive it but he is like my soul mate.evrything happens with him happens withme evrything he like i like @the beginingit was sofreaking weird and it's still weird till now..any way wewerefriend only but after 2 months he told me that he is in love with me ...and i've been hiding my feelings till i know what's his feelings...so i was glad that he told me that...and things got better and better..i talked to him over the phone ..and i saw him cuz i've been in his country twice....we r both muslim and we want this relationship to end by marrage...but the thing is that i'm not sure if my dad is gonna agree cuz he is from a diff culture and diff colore..i'm ok with all that but what about my family.
2007-02-17 14:14:59 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Travel ➔ Africa & Middle East ➔ Egypt
Love is not a basis for marriage. No matter what background you come from.
Are you two compatible? Do you really know him that well? Have you seen him in different situations to give yo a better idea on how he reacts to different things?
I know that in the middle east the extended family is part of your daily life. Do you know his family? Do you like them? Do they like you? How about your family?
You are still young and probably this is the first relationship you get into. Talk to your mother, or an older female relative for guidance.
Marriage is not the wedding and intimacy that comes with it. Marriage is a commitment and a life journey. Do you think you two are ready for such a commitment. Especially as you say your family may reject him.
Don't rush into things. Good Luck!
2007-02-17 17:44:33 · answer #1 · answered by Pabs 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Speak to your Mum first ask her opinion of how she thinks your Dad will react.
If you can't talk to Mum have you an elder sister or a good friend. One who you can trust to give a thoughtful and honest answer. Not just one she thinks you want to hear!
If you have known him for two months, and you have already been to visit him in his country twice.
Maybe its time he came to visit you!
That is what I would be expecting,not running after him all the time.Do it now and you will do it always!
He could and visit for a weekend. Then you can introduce him to your Dad as a friend. Afterwards ask your Dad, what he thought of your "friend".
Then you will know where you stand.
You are not being deceitful or disrespecting your father. Remember boyfriends even husbands can come and go.
But family is family for ever.
Can I just ask one thing,when you went to visit him,did he take you to meet his family, or at least his closest friends?
I don't mean just social mates.Real friends.
As you know a Muslim boy only takes home the girl he wants to marry!
Think about it, but don't go behind your families back,you may need them.
I do wish you good luck and hope it all works out fine.
Just slow it down a bit!
2007-02-17 21:18:35 · answer #2 · answered by sistablu...Maat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, the guys up there gave you great advice especially Paps and Sistablu. And yes, why don't you ask him to come to your country , if he can afford it, and be around .Maybe he will get a chance to meet your parents in a natural way. What I mean is that he doesn't have to bump into your father saying "Hey there I wanna marry ur daughter". No , you can arrange for them to meet in other situations.
I say take it easy and take your time and don't rush things. There is an old saying "Slowly, slowly you catch the monkey in the bush"
Also , you guys should interact in real life situations. The Internet could be pretty deceiving. One gets a chance to think carefully here and choose his words, but in real life you are who you are without elaboration.
Cheers and have a nice day.
2007-02-18 00:14:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well he is still Muslim, as you say. That's the biggest hurdle in relationships nowadays, the religious differences. He worships as you do, he holds the same values, so what do your parents really have against him? Racism is just wrong, it is a division that people create because they are fearful of those who are different. He doesn't seem that different...
I think that you should try and speak with your family about this. I realize that it may be a very difficult conversation, but as you feel you love him, it is also an important one.
Good Luck!
2007-02-17 14:28:31 · answer #4 · answered by Nikki 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I agree with sistablue about talking to your mom that will definitely help a lot,plus sorry to say that but we do happy to help you here but I think you better re post this question in your country area revealing the name of the other country cause your people will know better what is the general point of view of marrying someone from there according to your traditions,anyhow wish you the best of luck sweetheart
2007-02-17 21:42:37 · answer #5 · answered by Maro's mom 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
tell him that it bothers you. If he comes to a decision to be a sturdy boyfriend and if he fairly loves you he will attempt to end. don't be all whiney or he will imagine that you're merely attempting to regulate him. in case you will get him to end smoking then each little thing else will finally end. and think ofyou've got to assist him supply up pot because it truly is an dependancy. If he fairly loves then you definately he will pay interest to you.
2016-10-17 07:44:55 · answer #6 · answered by rambhool 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, first of all. Did he tell u that he wanna marry u or just u feel this?? becauze there r alot of guys just want girls as girlfrined or something but when its turned to marrage they run away. (Hope ur guy isnot one of them)...
2nd u should think well of such decision including that u ll leave ur country, family and friends to go and live with him in his country.. If u take the decision then tell ur mum or eldest brother or sister (yea i agree with whom told u to take ur mums opinion).. and try to convience her and tell her that u do love him and u ll be happy with him,...
Then after taking ur mum (or any close one to ur dad) in ur side, she should tell him and try to convience him.
But pliiz dont shout and dont raise ur voice cuz this ll make them more iron headed and make them mad and never agree on the subject :)
good luck, Rabbena ma3akee my sis
2007-02-18 00:27:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
But whats the problem??? You both are Muslims, aren't you?´i think this is the only thing can make you dad doesn't agree with your relationship...so...just think if you want live in him country or in yours..
2007-02-18 04:31:19 · answer #8 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I agree with Lata, if its meant to be, its meant to be. I think your family will learn to accept his culture. Just because of his culture does NOT make him a bad person, just means he believes in different things.. So, I say you follow your heart, and introduce your family to him...
2007-02-17 14:24:59 · answer #9 · answered by callaway126 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
ok online marrige ofcourse no u don't know what he is look like or what he do may be make funny faces on u or talk to his freinds on u badly or chat with u only to say i the friend of someone or else may be he is lier
2007-02-18 03:40:26 · answer #10 · answered by dodo 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋