Why do so many people think getting married young is such a big deal?

Question

well im getting married next month, im 18, and people are always like, "your so young, arent you scared, you shouldnt get married" it just really bothers me.

Answer 1

because generally, and I say "generally" not "all the time" young people don't have much experience or maturity............marriage is a big deal, a huge commitment and also involves a lot of legal aspects, so just make sure that this is what YOU want and go for it! Have fun, enjoy your wedding and good luck in life!

Answer 2

Most people would just say you're too young and "don't know yourself" or something like that. They don't trust teens to make wise decisions period. To be honest, there are downsides to getting married that young. People your age are usually not that financially stable, and once you get married you'll probably find finances can be a major point between married people. I'm a sociology major and the statistics on marriages at that age are not good. The younger the couple is when they marry, the more likely they are to divorce later in life. I'm not trying to discourage you, just wanna give you a few facts. What is most important is that you and your future husband are on the same wavelength about important matters. If you're sure you're ready to get married, don't let anyone make you feel bad. I wish both of you lots of happiness.

Answer 3

I was 19 when I got married. We have been married for almost 2 whole years now. =) I heard the same thing before I got married, and I am still hearing it. It really is discouraging. It feels like no one has faith in your love for each other. You really just need to follow your heart. Getting married at 18 is young, but age is not really the main factor. Don't get married just to move out, to see him more, or etc. You're marriage won't ever last. But when you do get married, make sure you still enjoy the little things in life. Make sure that you still go see that movie together, take long hot baths together, and hold hands when you go grocery shopping. Those little things matter and this is what helps keep you together. Oh and one other thing, always make sure he knows that you love him... Good Luck, and I hope my rambling helped you.

Answer 4

The same thing happened to my husband and I.When we got engaged at 18, after only knowing each other for a month, the people i worked with at the time didn't make a collection to buy us an engagement gift,(it was something that was always done in the event of an engagement,marriage or birth within the work place) this hurt because there was another woman I worked with who was engaged in the same week, and a collection was made for her.They said it was a "passing infatuation" with us and wouldn't last,we were too young.We were married within 6mths of meeting (still aged 18,and also received no wedding gift).We have been married 23yrs and still very happy together.The woman for whom they bought the engagement gift, split from her partner before we even married.It's not always easy at any age,but you grow and learn together and share so many experiences,good and bad,some people grow apart and others grow stronger together.Don't let it bother you unless you have doubts yourself,i had none nor did my husband,we have seen friends who waited yrs before marrying each other, and were much older than we were at the time of our marriage,marry, have children and part,or are together for the sake of their children (we were unable too have any, so that could never be an excuse for us still being together).I smile now when i think of the people who wouldn't contribute to a gift for us,most of their own marriages didn't last.Be happy,and love each other and you can get through anything,and i wish you both love and luck for your future.

Answer 5

Look lady. If you marry somebody this early in your life, you will have regrets. I promise you. You haven't even been through college or some of life's major trials.

When you get married you are owned and your freedom to do fun things is gone.

While you are young, you should test drive many cars like most women on this forum recommend to do. Also you should try on many pairs of shoes before you buy them.

This will help you find out what you want and what you don't want. And you can always look back on those fond memories of previous lovers. Why? Because your sexual past cannot be held against you. You have an advantage being single in modern society because you are a sexually liberated women.

You get married and you throw all that away. And don't forget, you cannot get out of it easily if you are dissapointed. You will be stuck with a lemon if you decide that marriage is not for you and you will have to go through a whole lot of trouble to get out of it.

Good luck

Answer 6

You are still a kid and should be concentrating on your future as a responsible adult. I view the need to get married so young as an excuse to bow out of self discovery and growth. I did marry young, had 2 children right away and BAM there went my chance to explore the world and learn to be self sufficient. My choice was bad because I was not mature enough to make such a huge move baised upon life experiance.
Think 2x. If it is meant to be you will get married, maybe after you finish college.
Love,
Your MOM!

Answer 7

It's about maturity. Marriage isn't like what it seems like on t.v. You have to actually work at,you will have fights and disagreements. Sometimes if your not mature enough to handle the disagreements or want to compromise it can cause problems in a marriage. At 18 you really should be concentrating on finish school and getting a career and growing as a person. I got engaged at 19,but didn't get married until I was 21.I knew I loved my husband,but wanted to party and travel before settling down. I am thankful that I waited until I was ready to actually settle down,because married life is very fun.It's work sometimes,but it's still fun.
As long as you are mature about the whole thing and you are actually ready to get married,then don't worry about what other people have to say. If you can look at yourself in the mirror and know that you will be okay and have any resentments later on in life. Then no worries

Answer 8

People think is a huge thing is because they care. They want you to realize that this man or woman will be your partner for the rest of your life. And with another perosn to take care for 24/7 you can't do somethings you want to. But on the other hand its ok. You will have the feeling that there is someone always to talk to when your upset and feel down.They are just looking out for you cause they want you to live life to the fullest. So go party it up at 18. You have the rest of your life to get married....

Answer 9

People really change A LOT between the ages of 18 and 28. A LOT!! You spend your life up until 18 becoming an adult. You need time to live as a single adult before you can figure out what you want as a married adult. Take your time. You have plenty!!

Answer 10

I am 23 and have been married for 8 years!!! It is not something that I advise to everyone. It takes A LOT of work and commitment. I had things going on in my family life that made me get married. I wish I could've done more for myself (school and such) before marrying. Although, I have a beautiful family now that I wouldn't trade for anything.

So, if you think you have done the things you want to do for yourself and you are willing to work HARD go for it.

Answer 11

Because it IS a big deal, and those of us who got married young, know what a mistake it turns out to be more often than not (I married at 19).

Adults tend to want you to not make the mistakes they did...they aren't trying to bum you out or rain on your parade, but having been young ourselves once, we know what it's like and how things that seem like a good idea at the time, often don't turn out to be...

However, nothing need be forever, so if it doesn't workout, you can still move on and take your life down a different path...

May whatever is best for you come to pass ☺