my friend slept with my husband who is also her husbands brother, need help now!!!!?

Question

K kinda wierd and complicated but here it goes.....
my friend she is way nice and cool i love her to death. and she is married to this guy. well for a while she has been trying to hook me up with his brother. well we have been together for quite some time now, we are married and expecting our first child.
now i just found out that 2 days before we got together she slept with my now husband. now i cant be mad about that cause technecoly were not together but i found a letter of her confessing her love to him and how she goes better with him than her own husband who to remind you is his brother.
i think its f***cked up, you dont do that to your friends or to your husband!!!
what do you guys think am i overreacting?

in answer to your question, the letter is fairly new and i just barely stumbeled upon it. thats then thing tho she is just now confessing her love for my husband, but its frustrating cause i am pregnant as well as she

in answer to the questions in your guys comments: mlssa_mllr's i totally understand where you are coming from, but the thing is im not mad that they slept together, like i said we were not together, i would expect my husband to not be mad at the people i have slept with before him. but im mad at her, for one for not telling me, and for two for trying to accomplish whatever it is she is trying to do with this letter. to everyone elses question me and my husband have already disscused it. we were going threw some stuff and i seen it and started to read it and he ripped it out of my hands, we had a big argument til he gave it back and i finished reading it and he told me everything. and no her husband doesnt know!!!!!!!!

in answer to additional questions yes she was with her husband when she slept with mine(which was before we were together) she had been with her husband for 5 or 6 years when it happened. they also had two kids at the time. they are now working on their third child. and yes i think her husband should know but i dont really feel like i am the one to tell him, i think my husband should. but if he dont here soon believe me i will. and i have talked to my husband and he swears he isnt being unfaithful but its real hard because this isnt the first time he has lied to me.

butterfly... although your advice sounds so sweet to me, i have thought of that the thing is tho, he ripped up the letter after we discussed it. he said he didnt know why he kept it, so he ripped it up cause he says he didnt need it, so if i still had the proof believe me i would have done that before i put this cry for help up!! anything else?

Answer 1

You are definately not overreacting. Fine, she slept with him b/f you two were married, but when he said "I do" with you he made his choice and she should have backed off. Not a good friend. Now she's just being greedy. Like someone else said don't let this stress you out right now. You're pregnant and need to take it easy. Stay away from this woman and if you still want your husband you keep him away from her too.

Answer 2

You need to be carefull with that person that you call "friend" because real friends don't do that to each other. As a friend she was supposed to tell you from the beggining that she selpt with the man who's your husband now, maybe things would it been different now. If I was you I will stop talking to her, and stop stressing out about it. I know she did something really bad, bad, bad, but remember that your pregnant and you don't want none of this to affect the baby because of her. Don't worry about her either, you don't have to deal with this because she'spregnant. She knows your pregnant and she's confesing her love to your husband, Remember that. You will have time to deal with it after you give birth. I do know one thing, you can trust that B.... anymore!
Did you talked to your husband about what you just found out?
Good Luck!

Answer 3

My Dear.. First off all I feel your pain.. And you are doing a good job now you are having a baby... You know... I will tell you something... Ohh boy... I`ve been with my husband now for 4 years... he was this FRIEND girl friend and they hooked up before we got together... well she is or was married to her 3rd Cousin... and my husband used to call her a DIFFERENT name so no one knew that he was talking to her.. well.. I dind't know anything till we got together.. but things got worse when time went on.. I got so many M on his Cellphone that she loves him and how she misses the way they used to do it here there blablabla... and at the time... OMG... time went but.. he got a present for his b-day and he STILL talks to her... at a point I started TALKING only to a friend of mine that we used to HANG AROUND and my husband found out.. off course it wasent nice of me. GOD what was I thinking.. well I was mad.. anyways... I trust my husband I know he is not doing anything stupid with that BIACH but... i can't tell him NOT TO TALK TO HER because he will. And when she calls... I pretend that it dosent botter me anymore.. I pretend I don't care.. But inside... I want to smack that BIACH... BUT I WILL TELL YOU ONE THING. THAT LITTLE SECRET THAT THEY HAD.. IT IS NO LONGER A SECRET. I MADE SURE I CALLED HIS MOM AND HER FRIEND AND AS YOU KNOW WORDS GET AROUND AND YES MY HUSBAND WAS PISSED BUT SHE IS NOT A SAINT... SO make sure you take that letter and take to her house and ask her in front of her husband if she sent to the wrong address.. and I`m pretty sure .. everyone will defend you. You have a withness and prof... so GO get her.. and don't get mad.. just enjoy.... It sound like a bad advise... But people like that are the ones that make this world the way it is.. War and Maddness all over...
Congratz on your baby!!!!

Answer 4

Yes, I think you are over-reacting, if you were not together you really shouldn't be the mad one. Now her husband however should be very upset, because this means she cheated on his. I would not be friends with her any longer if you think they still may have feelings.

Answer 5

You are SO NOT overreacting. Now, before anyone including you jumps to conclusions, you need to talk to your husband. Ask him why on God's green earth would he do your friend? But, hey, ya kinda need to talk with your friend. She's messed up, no offense. Who goes around sleeping with random men, not to mention if their MARRIED, committed to eachother, then goes to a close friend and sets them up? She obviously doesn't know what commitment is. Also, does her husband know? You need to talk to him about it. I mean, come on!

Answer 6

I'd slap her soo hard. If I had a friend who did that to me, my husband and hers she'd be gone! You are not over-reacting. If I were you I'd sit down and talk to her about how you feel so you don't hold hard feelings. I hope this helps you out. Good luck and Congrats!!

Answer 7

i believe you should try to stay as close to her as you can because you keep your friends close but your enemies closer and now she is your enemy. And if you want to stay with your husband try to be around him when he is around her. But if she is pregnant then hopefully it is just hormones and it will go away. I wish you luck with your family. And by the way did you talk to your husband because if not you need to to see what he thinks about it.

Answer 8

I think you should keep your space from her, she is a trouble maker and sneeky. Talk to your husband and make sure he is not being unfaithful. He should tell his brother, she is going to cause a rift in the family.

Answer 9

OMG!! no you are definitely not overreacting!! that is crazy!! what kind of friend is she??? she was trying 2 hook u up with the guy and she slept with him thats trashy and your husbands not any better b/c thats his brothers wife. i know its hard and a rash decision but u need 2 drop them both!!!

Answer 10

When did she write the letter? I say that if you and your husband are happy and she is relatively happy with hers that you just leave the past in the past.