counselling?

Question

Ive been with my partner for 7 years now, he has admitted to cheating on me once before but since then i cant help but rethink our past and i do really believe that it was more than once. it does haunt me from time to time and i can say i have difficulty trusting him. i have suggested a lie detector and he refused saying why waste money but i dont know how to go about it so i let it down and suggested realationship couselling and he refuses saying whats the point?! what do you think he's really up to? my reasons for staying is because i am scared of being hurt and i have a child to him and also currently pregnant to our second!!

Answer 1

if he is refusing or putting up an attitude, he is hiding something or keeping something from you.

Answer 2

The best 'lie' detector is your own suspicions and your own instincts, you would know better than anyone whether his actions and his current moods and whim are real evidence of your partner cheating on you.

Lie detectors are seldom 100% reliable anyway so you really will have to rely on yourself for this.

Just remember that with all of your belief that you are right you could easily be wrong.

The mere fact that he is refusing (point blank) to sort out the issues in a neutral environment should be evidence that he is not truly interested in being fair to you or at the very least compromising.

Answer 3

I too have been heartbroken by someone who had difficulty with fidelity and truth. Times I forgave and ended up going back for more. The word committment in the truest sense is bsent from the vocabulary of someone like this. He is beoing evasive ........and the fact you feel the need to ask for a lie detector test says such a lot about the state of the relationship. Step back....talk to a councellor it may help but really evaluate your life and your worth because this guy sounds to me like he does not deserve to have you and your love. There are many more out there he is not the only fish in the water.

Answer 4

Sweetheart,you're already hurting.If you don't feel that you can trust him,and he refuses to do anything to help you get over your insecurities,then you're going to carry on hurting.Seven years is a long time,and having kids makes going it alone even scarier,but do you really want to spend the rest of your life never knowing what-or who-he's been doing?It's going to be hard,and you'll probably spend time feeling sad and alone,but in the end you'll be a happier,stronger person-and therefore an even better mum to your kids than you are now.Be brave,take the plunge and say goodbye-you deserve better.

Answer 5

You need to get out now and seek a place for abused women if you think he will harm you. Think of your poor kids, is this the image you want them to grow up with as what a man should be? You owe it to them to get out. He's obviously cheating and isn't going to stop and doesn't want to even consider it, what about your health, in other words sexually transmitted diseases? Get checked out and talk to your doctor about where you can go for help. Good luck

Answer 6

Every relationship we have is based on trust. You can't function with someone that you don't trust. He needs to be working on rebuilding, if he isn't then....well I can't say leave, but I can say follow your heart.

Answer 7

get him to agree on counseling, if things seem to be that bad, tell it for thre two of you and your children, and if he will not do it, then he is not interesrested in your relationship. there are single mothers every where, never stay togather for the children, that makes things worse for them.

Answer 8

Go on jeremy Kyle, its free then, and you'll also ensure lots of women know he's married then.