Who was the disciplinarian in your home when you were growing up?

Question

For me, it was my father. I was so scared of that man. If I was acting up, my mom would say, "Don't make me tell your father." If I did something really wrong, my mom would say, "Wait till your father gets home and finds out about this."

But for my husband, it was his mother. She was the one who always did the spanking, the hitting upside the head, the groundings, and other assorted punishments.

My husband thinks if we have children, I'll be the disciplinarian for them. However, I think it should be him. I don't want to be the mean one! It is a constant debate for us...
:)

So my question is... When you were growing up, who was the disciplinarian in your home/family? And if you have children of your own, who is (or was) theirs?

Answer 1

my mom
my dad let me get away with murder (almost)

Answer 2

Dad was,but often times the penalty would be more than the offence itself not on me because I was the fourth child so watching him descend on my elders with the slightest provocation scared the daylight out of me and this kind of place me in a defensive position by avoiding that will provoke him. But what influence me positively had a very negative influence on my elders because they grow up so rebelious and at a point they were'nt scared of punishment anymore they had their minds made up but this does'nt mean that Mom was a by-stander.They all had a different way of disciplining us.
Second point who will be your children's disciplinerian? I dont think there should be a specialist to discipline an erring child.You made mention of not wanting to be the mean one;and if you avoid disciplining a child for this reason then you'll have to think again..would this mean that your child would get away with anything when the father's not around under your watch?Truth is,giving or receiving discipline is not always desirable but parents have to set their rules and violators should'nt be spared but dont let them predict what would be the outcome;but there are certain things you'll need to overlook sometimes. Children always look for loopholes and in loose household where discipline is thirdplace children would be non-chalant.But there are common mistakes parents make they tend to wait untill a certain age before they start adminitering discipline and this is expensive in the long run. Conclusively,discipline is neither dad or moms responsibility it's both otherwise the child will grow up hating one parent and loving the other.

Answer 3

I truthfully have 2 sisters (we are 3 women) and the disciplinarian at domicile became into my mom. My dad continually mentioned particular to easily approximately each little thing and he became into very particular - nevertheless is- with anybody. Now that i'm a mom and my husband facilitates our female offspring to do quite often what she needs I comprehend why my mom had to be the disciplinarian one. i myself could say God blessed me with super father and mom, advantageous they made their errors yet I only have satisfied thoughts human beings jointly and all of us have a very close relationships (my father and mom, my sisters and that i).

Answer 4

There wasn't one. My father left when I was 5 and my mom worked 2 jobs trying to support 5 kids on her own. My Mom tried her best but she was just too busy with work. Discipine is very important in a childs life. It teaches them right from wrong and the reasoning behind it. You can teach with discipline and it does not have to be thru punishment. You can teach consequences in many different manners. A parenting class will do great on giving you many types of discipine approaches.

Answer 5

you & your husband must be together on this one. make decisions together

raising kids is different today. be firm with rules, but not mean. Be a parent, not a friend. Hitting isn't good. teaches violence. Be firm with TV watching rules.

get a good parenting book to read. Learn about "teaching moments" that happen in life.

hardest job in the world. good luck to both of you.

Answer 6

I had great parents got my tail fanned by both...I've raised three daughters and a son and my wife and I both handed out the discipline and that's the way it should be...raising children like everything else in a marraige is a co-responsibility.

Answer 7

My mother was. She didn't take any crap.

My husband was the disciplinarian to our children. As long as what they were doing wasn't hurting them or anyone else, I let stuff slide.

Answer 8

My mother was. My dad ignored me all the time. Just as long as you weren't bothering him he was fine. My mother had to assume the job of mother and father when it came to dicipline but she did well. I have a close relationship with her. As for my dad he doesn't bother to talk to me except once a year. I am 32 now and I still don't have a relationship with him.

Answer 9

I never really had one because I wasn't that bad of a kid. But I think Women should punish girls, and men should punish the boys. That about equals it out right.

Answer 10

My father....he was out of hand...breaking bones and trying to break my spirit...he did not succeed. Fortunately my mother could accomplish with pacifism getting the point across. it is sad and I know I am not the only one....but you asked!!!!

Answer 11

The law. I had to call the police on my parents quite a bit, and I would do it again.