What should I do? I know my husband and I have only been married 6 months and we can't get along at all. We work together which is our first mistake and we reliaze we can't stand each other. We have pushed each others buttons to the point where we both can't handel the other person. We have an apt w/ a marriage counsler on Wednesday and he says" it won't help" nothing can fix it-talking can't fix the way he feels. He feels like when he looks at me all he sees is"bad" and negative things? what should I do? I'm going to the apt. by myself and asked him to please meet me there and try......
2007-02-17 06:56:50 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Get out of it, he's obviously the problem and you deserve better
2007-02-17 07:01:28 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What attracted you to each other in the first place? Did something change? If you used to go out all the time and you've been cooped up at home, I know the stress can get to you.
I suggest that one of you find another job. It's healthy to have time apart and seperate friends.
Make a point of NOT getting on his nerves. I know how easy it is when you are fighting to just go for the throat and really hurt the one you love. This can be a difficult thing to get past.
The trick is to just start being a better person, that's all you can do for now. If your husband does not follow suit then you need to give him the option of counseling or an anullment.
For right now, just make a date with him. Do not discuss any of your problems or work. Just treat him as if you were on a first date.
2007-02-17 07:05:08 · answer #2 · answered by iampatsajak 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd forget about that little appointment and not embarrass myself by showing up alone. He hates the sight of you , he can't stand to look at you, you irritate him, he just wants out. Do you want to stay in a marriage of 6 months knowing he feels the way he does. Get on with your life your still young , you happened to marry the wrong person. There are plenty out there take your pick, but next time find someone just the opposite of him. next time be sure that you both have the same likes the same feelings for each other and move in with him and see how it works.it's a heck of a lot easier to pack up and leave than it is to go through a divorce. It better to just say so long sweet thing, we didn't make it but lots of luck. It's hell of a lot cheaper.
2007-02-17 07:11:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok there two sides to everything so you need to analyze what makes him feel like this and the same goes for you.
This is the only way to nip it in the bud before it gets messy because in your case aversion has set in and it sure as hell isnt going to be a clean split so for the sake of both of you one of you maybe you will have to initiate a heart to heart and grab hold of the real problem here which is giving each other some space .
Sometimes big problems have small reasons easily rectified and vice versa.
I sincerely hope you think in your case ot is the former not the latter.
Good luck you will need it.
2007-02-17 07:14:42 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, you have an uphill battle if that is how he feels. But it isnt impossible.
Now, you both need to realize that you picked the position you are in, by marriage. You both also need to realize that being selfish and simply pushing one anothers buttons is not only counter-productive, but wrong as well.
You and he vowed to God, one another and yourself. Now I have no idea how much of a religious background or faith you have, but it is still true that you vowed to be faithful and to make this marriage work.
I would suggest aside from your marriage counseling, you also both take a gander at what the Bible has to say on the subject.
I hope that this does work and that you both work together and have a great marriage.
2007-02-17 07:08:38 · answer #5 · answered by Mr. JW 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh, divorce him. He's a bum and nothing has changed from the first time he cheated with the exception that you took him back and added two more kids into this mess. You need to call your family and find out if they can help you. My guess is you have never listened to any advice from them regarding this bum so just go over there and beg them instead of begging this bum to stay. You can't break it off because you are weak, scared and will show your children how to be treated by a man. Do you realize your children will repeat this behavior? They see you doing it, they see him doing it. Call your family and find out if any of them can let you move in, help you with rent, etc.
2016-05-23 23:15:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are doing the right thing, all you can do is try. Go see the counselor, vent all your frustrations to him and then go home calm and cool when its time to talk to the hubby. Maybe when he sees the change in you, he'll open up to the idea of counseling.
And stop doing whatever it is you do to push his buttons, even if he pushes yours! Just makes everything worse.
Best of luck , and i really hope everything works out great for you
2007-02-17 07:03:10 · answer #7 · answered by independent101 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him, look, its no picnic but we go to the therapist and TRY. And then go again. Do it for 30 days. We promised to stay together - try EVERYTHING to fix it. Then, if its still broken, then you walk. But don't walk without trying.
2007-02-17 07:03:42 · answer #8 · answered by Ade 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Did you rush into the marriage that is to bad he doesnt seem to want to work things out so your on your own you need to get an anilment. sorry.lol
2007-02-17 07:02:30 · answer #9 · answered by sweetpea 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋