Bit of a strange one for me - but it's really starting to bug me so answers appreciated...
I've been working with this girl for about 4 months but in that time she's hardly said a word to me, in fact she blatantly ignores me when I say "good morning" or "how are you?" yet speaks quite normally to everyone else.
The thing is, I've done absolutely nothing to offend her (have hardly spoken with her, let alone argued or anything like that) and I've been nothing but nice to her.
Just for the record, I don't fancy her - I'm happily married.
I know most of you will just tell me to ignore her, but I'm a pretty friendly guy and am not used to being treated in such a hostile way. Should I keep doing what I'm doing and be nice, or change tactics and be openly unpleasant back to her (which is what she deserves, but not in my nature). Ignoring isn't really an option as we have to work pretty closely together.
Thanks in advance for the replies...
2007-02-17 04:49:40 · 22 answers · asked by JoeBloggs 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
maybe she likes you and she doesnt want to increase her feelings by talking to you cuz you're married. continue being nice to her, that's all you can do and she'll get over it soon (if i'm right).
2007-02-17 04:52:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
I'd speak to my managar and advise that their seems to be some hostilaly there. Advise you have tried to be polite and friendly however you feel she may have some issues with you.
In this way the manager can ask her if she has any issues with anybody on the team, anybody she gets on less then others in her next one to one. If there is a serious issues why she blanks you your manager can help in resolving this in a calm controlled manner.
However it may just be that she doesn't have time for you, no reason. In which case you should back off, your not losing anything by not having anything to do with her.
Other then that if your super bubbly (like me) just have a one way conversation with her anytime you bump into her. reamin cheery and chatty it may be it takes her time to warm up to people but it umwilling to make the effort to get to know others.
2007-02-17 05:26:21 · answer #2 · answered by Char Black 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I had - a few years back - the same. I was working in a restaurant and the assistant manager wasnt exactly friendly. Not that he was rude, but he was just ... hostile. So, after a night of work I asked him what i did to be treated like that. He was completely surprised, and never knew that his behavior could be interpreted so negatively.
Now we are best friends!
So maybe you should just be open to her and ask! it will not hurt, and what do you have to lose. Explain that you are married and that you are not hitting on her, but that a pleasant working atmosphere is important to you. And that her behavior makes you wondering and worrying...
Good luck!
2007-02-17 04:56:08 · answer #3 · answered by MM 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The only way that your going to find out is by asking her directly, we could give you lots of suggestions but it really needs to come from the horses mouth. Just ask her in a nice way if you have said or done something to offend her and that as collegues you would like to think that you could have a good friendly working relationship. If she is rude or ignorant then I guess you jsut need to accept that her head is obviously to far up her own ****.
2007-02-17 04:58:12 · answer #4 · answered by thedaddy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have been guilty of that. My reasoning is usually along the lines of "because I can". However, I don't do that stuff at work.
There is nothing you can do. Just ignore it. She probably either feels akward around you, you remind her of someone, or she just doesn't socialize well with men. It could be a whole host of things, just realize that it isn't important and move on. Be professional, just plod on. You sound like an alright guy, so don't worry about her.
2007-02-17 04:58:00 · answer #5 · answered by Thera 9 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmm i would say approach her on this. If you haven't done anything (knowingly) to offend her then really she shouldnt act that way. However we all have our own little prejudices...so maybe its something stupid, or she just feels you rub her the wrong way (metaphorically speaking).
I work at a call center and some people i tend to dislike our new agents until i get to know them. But yeah i would approach her about it, maybe say "seeing as we work together I rather us be able to get along but you seem to dislike me and I am not sure why or what i may have done for you to dislike me. "
2007-02-17 04:57:39 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like she's a stuck up snob. Being the Nice/Sweet guy that you are..and that unfortunately you have to work closely with her...I would continue BEING YOU* Don't change your ways .......like you said "it's not you".
You've done nothing wrong* Just keep being you*!
2007-02-17 04:53:21 · answer #7 · answered by friskymisty01 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women can be unreasonable- they describe it as "their prerogative". I think being openly unpleasant is unecessary, but perhaps she doesn't realise she is doing it (I know that may seem unllikely, but you never know).
I would advise getting a "work night out" organised- have a couple of drinks and see if she relaxes/starts chatting. If not- have a couple of extra drinks and confront her!
2007-02-17 04:56:00 · answer #8 · answered by MARC H 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you make her nervous. Maybe she is attracted to you, but knows your married and is trying to avoid you for that reason. Unless its begining to offend you I'd just respect the fact that shes nervous (or whatever the case may be) around you. Maybe next time make a joke about it "Geeze ---- (insert name) way to say hi" or something ya know.??? Good luck
2007-02-17 04:54:32 · answer #9 · answered by sarajanicew 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is a b!t£h. Just ignore her. She not worth the time & effort. Just be civil to her & do your work you have do with her. Try & not take the things she says to personally. She is the one with the problem.
2007-02-17 05:22:13 · answer #10 · answered by meko76 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe she thinks you like her. sometimes girls get the wrong idea when a guy is nice to her. maybe ask around and see why she is like that. and if no one can tell you, then give up. some people just don't deserve pleasant people around them
2007-02-17 04:54:28 · answer #11 · answered by not2hot2bp_rican 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋