Isn't happiness and optimism reality ? Why do some say it's not...that life is hard ?

Question

I believe in authentic love, that people are generally enjoyable, that a healthy loving relationship is obtainable, passionate sexual relationship with a loved one shared exclusively with one another for years...decades...is possible. That life really is good. Sucky things happen in life...but that life is still generally very joyful and celebrating. I'm happy...simply because I am. Some try to make a person of that mind thought think that I'm living in a fantasy world, that what I feel to be reality (as I noted above here) is not really what the world is about.

Yes, there are challanges, dips, lessons, pains in life...But, those moments are experienced and move past...And...life actually is magnificant.

Why are there so many more ' grumpy ' minds and hearts out there than bright ones ? And...why do SO MANY want to tell those of bright hearts that that way of thinking is not reality?

I'm a celebrating 50 soul and heart. I've experienced life.

Your thoughts ?

" Malcom ". . . O.k. fine...Now go skulk to some other site that you would be more suited for. I do have a bright heart with life...Yet, also am very aware there are skulky people out there...even here. I'm still smiling...but you...go somewhere else.
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" Bradley " . . . Thanks for you openly sharing. I'm, joyfully so...50. I've discovered I can have a ' re-wright ' any time that I'm ready for that. I as well had a very ' sour ' upbringing...Yet, that was them...it's not who I truely am myself. Once I was out of that house and had a ' de-brief ' after the battle so to speak...I woke up within me who I truely know I am in my core...a bright, celebrating woman walking on my own soul journey...bumps, joys and all. My childhood is something that happened to me...yet is not WHO I am. I came to realize that and I do celebrate who I am and know that life is magnificant...a bit odd at times...yet still magnificant.
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" Super Ruper "...a glimmer in the fog...thanks. " The winner " I feel is when one, rich or of less money, knows how to smile when they feel their own heart. Yes, life does get hard sometimes...yet I know in my core that I feel value within. I have dear friends...yet I am also a dear friend to my own self. Something I had to learn.
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" Romale " . . . YES ! ! ! It IS so. There are likeminded out there and you stepped out and shared your thoughts of what I agree with and know to be so. Thank you.
More I could share...but will leave this here with a smile. Thank you for sharing. It IS so. Smiles

Answer 1

I'm not saying optimism isn't wrong, but it isn't always right either. A little pessimism is necessary to stay grounded in an imperfect world. I'm glad you seem to have found happiness, and I hope I find it one day as well. But in my 21 years, I've come to the tentative conclusion that life is mostly suffering intermittently broken by fleeting moments of satisfaction. Both of my parents have struggled with depression and alcoholism, and my family has a long history of mental illness, so maybe I am genetically predisposed to pessimism.

Answer 2

Why are there so many more ' grumpy ' minds and hearts out there than bright ones ?

Well its easier to be grumpy, especially if a person is not going to be nice to life, nature it guide it by the horns and learn how to ride.

Some believe that they have zero control over themselves at times. When in all reality, each individual is the master of their own mind until they accept the control of an external force. A person is usually only a few decisions from peace love and happiness. These things are just attitudes that come from the inside of a person.

These people have just failed to accept the idea that these things can be theirs, and what’s possible on the outside is possible on the inside. Maybe they are callous, but calluses can soften. Hard decisions are not easily made. First things first, many are not truly passionate about what they really desire out of life, and have accepted defeat (discouraged). Humans have one desire and that is to have reciprocity in love. A person feeling unneeded and unimportant will be grumpy. There was a point when I was not loving myself and I didn't even know it, I was depressed and ashamed of my own existence. I wanted to die, and believe all things were a failure from conception.

Yeah so If these people don't love or care and believe in their selves or dreams.. got to turn that all around.

*And...why do SO MANY want to tell those of bright hearts that that way of thinking is not reality?

People enforce their own realities.. if they didn't then they'd have to come to terms with yours. To an individual their reality is the only one, and a foundation. Yeah!

Reinforcement can mean, proving their reality through seeing their beliefs manifested in yours. Sad I know. But there is hope.

My thoughts ?

Introduce the possibility of a happy life. Asking Questions sparks first an Image, then an emotion, then an attitude, and then magically an idea.

Asking questions introduces ideas and attitudes, most importantly it draws them from the inside into the minds of others. The questions origin is external but the answers origin is internal.

Questions make images in the brain, and like drilling through a mountain, there is the possibility of an optimistic and happiness inside every ones mind. It starts with a change of thinking first. And a choice to see, an image and accept it a possible, and believe in it, that it is obtainable and tangible.

Answer 3

Someone posted a question such as yours not too long ago. He thought that there was no point in working so damn long to simply die at the end. I explained to him that working is actually one of life's necessities. How else would you enjoy it? How else would you experience a sunset in another country or free-fall off a plane? Sadly, you need money in order to fulfill these experiences. So, for me, there is the purpose of all that hard work... to pay off all of life's expenses. ;)

Answer 4

I'm happy for you that you see life as a joyful journey, not a struggle. Its all a matter of attitude. The same circumstances may confront two different individuals, and their attitudes will dictate how they view those circumstances and how they handle them.

There isn't one 'way'...it is an individual journey. You are enjoying yours, while others aren't enjoying their own. Who's the winner there?

Answer 5

You dont look fifty!
My thoughts are that it would be nice if you could have a word with some of the people on here whom might be considered by some to have something long and thin that appears to have been inserted into the rectum

I'm gone already one light. By the way, many would find that an unjust, not to mention quite cruel answer for someone who considers herself to have a brght heart.
And threre are other sites than here for cruel people too.

Answer 6

because one shares optimism in an ideology does not mean all do; human nature is generally pessimistic, though perception itself is based on the unreliablity of opinions and beliefs; beliefs are not the same as truth, we base beliefs off of a wide range of irrationability, if it were so linear, we would seem like zombies; our culture seems to endorse many wrong things, and the people in our culture just want to be like the others and fit in, so they adopt the ideology of their friends, family, etc. if we were not meant to feel sadness, God would not have imprinted it on human nature. in fact, the idea of whether sadness or happiness 'feels' better is also opinionated. given human nature of comparison, people will always be viewed as 'sad' people, even if, in fact, they are not, they're just more sad than others. you could say comparison itself is pessimistic

if one's ever suddenly felt two extremely varying points of views on something, they know that a large multitude of perceptions for a given event are feasible

Answer 7

Both optimists and pessimists contribute to our society. The optimist invents the airplane and the pessimist the parachute.

Answer 8

As someone who has been around, for some 40 odd years myself....I can definitely say, *MY* life is in fact hard. I have tried time and again to improve my lot in life, to get the education, get the good job, and to get my life going....only to have other people thwart and frustrate me *every single time*. This isn't some flight of fancy either....I am up to my eyeballs in debt courtesy of trying to get the education, and have the health problems and scar tissue to show for the physical and emotional problems I've had and continue to have....

And honestly, what it boils down to...and I am *not* trying to disrespect your lifestyle or worldview in any way when I say this, but it really all boils down to three simple words:

Life. IS. Unfair.

It is that simple. None of us get to choose our parents, and most of us do *not* have much say in or control over our lives for the first 20 years of our lives. Meaning, *if* you are born to parents who are disabled, or who declare bankruptcy shortly before you are born, or who are violent, abusive, predatory people...odds are growing up in a family like that will leave your life hard, bitter, and difficult to say the least, if not outright poisoned. Why is that *so difficult* for people to understand? Why is it so hard for folks to understand that most of us spend the first 15-20 years of our lives at the mercy of things *totally outside* our control, and that they can shape us, for good or ill, *for Life*?

Oh, yeah, like the first idiot mentioned, some folks have a stick up their potato chute. They can't imagine that people have been wronged from day *one* and that it's left scar tissue, and that the *silence* of these "lambs" around us, the silence of the people with the stick wedged up high and tight, is actually nothing more nor less than being an *accomplice* of the predators. If you aren't a part of the solution, at least as an adult who *should* know better....then hell yes, you *ARE* a part of the problem.

But hey, I get it. Life IS unfair. As in, it continues to be. As in, people stand to make too much money exploiting that unfairness, and the manifold problems it creates....it's a cottage industry, *using* people's problems as a *profit center* versus actually solving problems. Just with my debts alone, if I ever paid off all my bills, I swear it would put 50 telephone solicitors out of work. We can't have that, can we? :p *lol*

But yeah....I get it. People don't *have to* care, they don't *have to* do anything but carry on being greedy and selfish to the point of *enabling* the predation of others....people don't have to do anything but die and pay taxes.

Just don't get in *my* face and try telling me *my* life isn't hard when a) you don't know me, and b) you don't care to. I've tried, I've worked my tail off, I've all but thrown *away* my childhood and teenage years trying to get a better life for myself....I've tried to live happiness and optimism.

And I am *tired* of blaming myself for my life not turning out right, when I know it's other people screwing me over, again and again and *again* and again....

Sorry to go on so, but geez. Do you think I *want* my life to suck? Do you think I don't try to make things better in some way all the time? No sane person wants to live a life of nonstop frustration and despair....I know I don't.

But some of you people out there are just as hellbent on *not* letting me succeed, for whatever reasons. And I do get tired of that being *my* problem.

Just saying. Sorry to go on so....thanks for your time.