I have had my 1st ultrasound; have taken 5 pregnancy test and yet it still just doesn't seem real. It does when I'm talking to my friends and fmaily but when I'm alone and I start to think about it; it's like it's not real at all to me. Like it's a dream and I'm going to wake up from it. I'm under a lot of stress right now too and I wonder if tha thas anything to do with it. I'm working 60 plus hours a wk.; I'm trying to find an apartment; the father wants nothign to do with me; trying ot fill out all my applications for state assistance. I don't know..I jsut want this to feel real and it just dones't. Will this pass? I feel like I'm already a horrible mom because of it.
2007-02-17 02:25:29 · 15 answers · asked by misse2341 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
No no no. You're not a horrible mom for this. It is totally normal to not come to terms with the reality of pregnancy. It took me many months until it hit me that I was having a baby (even her kicking didn't really shock me into reality). The feeling that it's just a dream might even last all the way until the baby actually comes. Congrats on your pregnancy. Best of luck.
2007-02-17 02:31:57 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
I'm so glad I found you... I'm 16-17 weeks pregnant, starting to finally get a little round pooch, have had the ultrasound, and can feel the baby moving all over the place... and it STILL does not feel real!
I always knew I wanted kids, but I guess I just never pictured my self as a mom, if that makes any sense...
I'm not under too much stress, and I don't feel hormonal, so maybe it's just "surreal" for everyone? It's amazing... we see people go through this all the time and yet it's so unreal when we get pregnant ourselves.
I don't think it will be "real" to me until labor! There's no point to worry because it's coming one way or another.
Good luck and I'll be praying for you! (BTW, I'm sure you'll be a great mom... the fact that you're concerned about your reaction tells me you're very in-tune with the baby already.)
2007-02-17 02:44:59 · answer #2 · answered by sublimekindalife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If the test came back positive you are pregnant, then you are. How old are you. It seems like you are a young girl. The first thing you need to do is find a doctor for prenatal care. Face the fact that you are pregnant and do what you have to do for the child. If you plan on keeping it, get medical attention. Talk to your doctor about your options, keep it, give it up or abortion (which I am strongly against) There are clinics and family services out there to help you. It is a shame that your father does not stand by you. I think that may be one reason you are in denial. That in itself can cause alot of stress. Where is the father? Even if he is not around you need medical help and assistance from somewhere. If not the father or you father from the state. I wish you the best of luck.
2007-02-17 02:37:22 · answer #3 · answered by Luann C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Even though the baby is a part of you, he can't hear your thoughts or read your mind. I had a lot of anxiety about this pregnancy because my older daughter will only be 20 months old when the baby is born... I read that the baby can't hear my thoughts, somewhere, and it really helped with the bad mommy guilt I was feeling. I hope it helps you, too.
The bigger you get, the more real it will feel. For now, try to take care of yourself a little better (working 60+ hours a week is hard on your body!), try to work things out with the father, and see if getting some of that resolved doesn't help you feel better about things.
Good luck.
2007-02-17 02:31:29 · answer #4 · answered by Amy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know it will pass because it IS real! And once you start to feel your little one move around then you'll really know it's for real. I was the same way, in fact it took me up until I was 8 months pregnant to realize that this was really happening to me. When we had her baby shower, I remember bringing all this stuff home and I was like, WOW, I'm really going to have a baby living here with me, and I do! And it's wonderful. At first I didn't even want to buy maternity clothes because I STILL wasn't sure if I was REALLY pregnant. Your growing belly will prove that all wrong, it will pass, try to enjoy it!
2007-02-17 02:33:57 · answer #5 · answered by tlimsisnw7 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't worry, your not a horrible mom at all. When I found I was pregnant with my daughter it wasn't real for a VERY long time. I don't think I really started to feel it until I was getting big and feeling her kicking all the time, even then it seemed like a dream sometimes. Your not a bad parent at all, you just have so many other things going on your mind hasn't stopped and really taken it in yet. Maybe you should try and start buying things for the baby, if your getting bigger, start taking pics as your grow, if you feel the baby focus on that, try to focus more on it and enjoy it! :D
2007-02-17 02:32:42 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Yes this will pass. It is partly because of your situation and probably partly from hormones. Not having a supportive mate significantly contributes to your stress and it sounds like you're working a lot. Take a deep breath and count to 10. Even when you're child turns five (or 7 or 10) you'll sometimes look at them and go "Is that kid really mine?" LOL I do that and my oldest is almost 7. :) Hang in there. Find a good supportive mom's group, even an online one can help.
2007-02-17 02:29:11 · answer #7 · answered by FunMom2Two 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't say you're awful mom. You're obviously getting prenatal care if you had an u/s, you're just having a hard time because of your situation. It will pass.
To the idiot who told her that "something doesn't add up", just because someone's on govt assistance doesn't mean that they don't work, it means that they aren't lazy and just living off of it but are actually TRYING to make a better life for their family but aren't able to make ends meet!
Don't let anyone make you feel bad for asking for assistance, you're still working and trying!! I'm sure it'll pass when you start showing, feeling your baby move, etc. You can do it!
2007-02-17 02:46:12 · answer #8 · answered by Trouble's Mama 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It will pass. Once you start feeling the baby move, it will become real. Your not a bad mom, your a typical mom. Everyone feels stress and anxiety. This is normal. Once you get your place, things will fall into place. It just takes time! I know that it took me a while to "feel Pregnant" But once she started kicking and moving, everything changed.
Just find time for yourself, to relax and to get your mind off of the other issues!
2007-02-17 02:34:09 · answer #9 · answered by me a 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do not stress. It sounds like you have a level head on your shoulders and are doing all the right things to get yourself, and the world around you, ready for your little one to enter this world. I remember it was just 20 short months ago that my wife and I found out she was pregnant. I remember clammering around, me being a college student, I had to get WIC and Food Stamps and LIHEAP and MEDICAID and the list goes on! You just need to take a step back, tell work you need a few hours less a week, tell the father to get ready to start paying and plain and simple just take it easy! This feeling you have will pass only if you decide to take the bull by the horns so to speak and start taking life a little easier, if not for yourself then for the little one inside you!
2007-02-17 02:32:51 · answer #10 · answered by Patrick Eaton 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋