How to get baby to fall asleep on own (without falling asleep in my arms)?

Question

Ok, so my baby falls asleep in my arms every night. Then I put her to bed. I feel like she's dependent on this. Sometimes when she wakes up (an no one's there), she'll cry. I'll usually put a passy in her mouth and she'll go back to sleep. She is over 5 months old. I figure it's getting close to breaking this habit and letting her fall asleep on her own. Anyone have any suggestions on how? (The other day she was dog tired in her bouncy seat, but would not go to sleep until I held her!) I don't really mind it, but am afraid she's going to get a little spoiled and when she gets older it could be a problem.

Answer 1

Animals don't doubt when they cuddle or snuggle with their babies. Why are people? If baby falls asleep better in your arms, why not? There is absolutely nothing wrong with giving the baby a sense of comfort and security. He will grow up with a lot of confidence in the world. Keep up the good work. It is an Old Wives' tale that babies get spoiled that way. Hogwash.

Answer 2

First things first. Do not put things in the crib with the baby unless you want to run the risk of baby smothering itself in it's sleep. Are you swaddling the baby in a light blanket that lets light through? You should swaddle baby because the newborn will feel like it is still in the womb where it was all scrunched up and warm. With my newborn I noticed that if I swaddled the arms down then my baby would fall asleep faster. Also do not pick the baby up unless they are crying. A few little whimpers here and there could be them trying to get an arm loose which makes them tired so you still win. Also try to go about your business after you put the baby down because I am sure that for almost 9+ months you weren't whispering while baby was in your tummy.

Good luck and hope this helps.

Answer 3

try the ferber(sp?) method, which says basically to set up a routine for the baby and then feed and change the baby and put them to sleep in the crib, let them know, you will be right outside the door and love them but WALK AWAY! The baby WILL cry, after 5 min. of crying , go in and comfort the baby and tell they you love them and kiss them, AND THEN LEAVE, The baby will cry, after 10 minutes go in and comfort again and then leave. then don;t go in until 20 minutes of the babycrying. Don't talk to baby just look and make sure they are not hurting themselves. The baby will know you are there for them but will understand that it's bed time.
I did this and it was HARD because the baby is crying but I kid you not, that after 3 days my son was sleeping without any crying, and to this day (6 years later) they sleep without problems(they like the closet lights on). It will hurt, because the baby is crying and you want to comfort them but you will be glad you did this when they are asleep by 8-8:30 and you getyour sanity & arms back!

Answer 4

I totally understand what your going through. My daughter is now 2.5yrs old and I'm just over 38weeks pregnant so I'm expecting any day now. My daughter is my life and I have always been unable to do the put in bed awake and let her scream. I do not run to her immediately when she cries but I feel it inappropriate to let her get to the state where she falls asleep because of crying and tiring herself out. Everyone now is saying how hard I am going to find it with the new baby, I can't see it. Everyone has different ways of parenting and do what you feel is right for your child. My daughter has been forward with everything she has done, she has been out of nappies and using the toilet for over a year, dry through out the night, her speech is better than any of the other 2.5yr olds at her playschool, she was having a bottle before bed and in the last 2 weeks that has stopped. She sleeps in her room through the night and only comes into me if she needs the toilet. At bed time her routine is, bath, pj's, dummy and teddy, she sits on me for a cuddle and in 5-10 minutes she is asleep. I can't see the harm in that. Any routine you get your children into I believe changes and break and new ones are made. Its a way of day to day life. I bet your a great mum and you daughter feels safe and at great ease when with you and in your arms. Your doing fine as you are.
Good luckxx

Answer 5

habits can be hard to break but dont give in. Your baby will feel closeness and security when held in your arms so try and create this ame effect with a nice soft blanket and snuggle her in it. Lay her down on her back either in her cot or cradle and have her next to your bed. If you have a musical toy then lay that near her, the gentle lusic will hopefully soothe her, when she starts to whimper or cry gently stroke her face, this way she is getting your touch without you actually holding her. You could try a nice bath with a touch of lavender in it before bedtime this can help to calm baby then feed her her bottle once sheis dressed and snuggled in a blanket. good luck, persistant is the key.

Answer 6

This is gonna sound awful but let her cry.

I know I know but I couldn't let my child cry either, until he was still sharing out bed at 1 1/2. Check on her every 1/2 hr and hug her - then offer her a dring of water/juice (don't let her become dependent on milk at night as she'll just keep crying for it).

I felt awful doing this but after a week he was sleeping through. Tried it with my younger son and it worked.

Though at her age, if she wakes for a feed don't deny her it. She's too young to go without

Answer 7

Lie her in the cot and talk to her for a while. I close all curtains, use a low nightlight and leave the radio on (sky+ radio) so she still has a dim light from the radio screen on tv and doesn't feel completely alone. I use Mellow Magic, channel 0180-very soothing! After 10 mins, I quietly leave after kissing him goodnight. Don't go back!! Not unless she has cried for quite a while but she will soon see the pattern and realise that its bedtime! They need repetition.Works for my 10 month old and has done since birth! and also for my first 2 kids!!

Answer 8

I held my daughter until she was like 9 months old to put her to sleep. Now i just put her to bed with her special blanket and she goes to sleep. Sometimes she cries for a few minutes but she stops right away. I would not worry about her being too spoiled, in my opinion you cant spoil a baby enough. I put her to bed with her bottle (even though you are not supposed to) and she did just fine with that too. Good luck.

Answer 9

You cannot spoil a baby.
You cannot spoil a baby.
You cannot spoil a baby.

Babies need to feel love and comfort in order to feel secure. This starts out as a baby. You need to keep her feeling secure for her to have good self esteem and a strong sense of her own well being.
As long as you teach your child the right morals and raise them in a good home and lifestyle, they'll be fine. They wont be 'spoiled'.

You have to hold your baby. She wont be a baby for long and you'll miss all this bonding time when she gets more independant. Hold on to her as long as you can. Life is too short/
Never let a baby 'cry it out'. They need comfort, if she's crying, hold her. You'll be glad you did when she's a loving and kind young woman.
Good luck and congrats on the darling baby girl!

Mom of 2.5 yr old, 16 weeks along with #2!

Answer 10

i has this problem with my daughter when she was a baby, the best thing you can do is put her into her bed and let her cry, go in every so often to reassure her that you are there but don't lift her out just talk to her or stroke her head,baby's are very cleaver she Willl soon realise that you are not going to let her sleep in your arms and she wil give up and go to sleep on her own, if you do that for a few nights then it should work, it worked on my daughter.