how to deal with this manipulative mother?

Question

my mother has abused me physically and emotionally all my childhood, i've moved out when i was 22 and now i enjoy my life very much, my younger sister (the golden child) is still living with her. I rarely visit my mother as everytime i visit i have to endure nasty remarks such as 'you are not a good person' or 'your don't deserve your boyfriend', last time she called me to let me know that in my father's will there are 2 houses to give to me and my sister, she said my sister has already 'own' her house and she can do whatever she wants with it, but I have to 'prove' myself to her or she may never give me the house, she also compare me to my sister, saying my sister is 'more honest than you', well, i quickly got off the phone and has never contacted her again, yesterday she has knocked on my door and my boyfriend let her in, she brought alot of food and gift, lucky i wasn't home, she also left me a letter which i threw away without reading, what should i do with this manipulative woma

Answer 1

I would contact a lawyer regarding the house, I don't think she can with hold that from you unless it was stated that way in the will. As for her saying nasty things to you, stand up for yourself she may be your mother but she has not right to treat you like dirt. Let her know that if she continues to put you down that you will no longer have a relationship with her. Good luck

Answer 2

This makes me angry to be honest how you are treated by her its not fair or right. she is just a doing alot of bad things as a mother comparing you with her. One day you may have kids and see what she has done is wrong. ignore her remarks a nice person would not say them, ignore her. She does not own you, and you are precious see yourself as God sees you not your mother. You belong to God not her, we are loaned to our parents but God really owns us.
It must affect your self esteem being compared and put down so much, dont, compare yourself to your sister, she should not interefere and let you and your sister be close and get on. She does not sound a very happy woman, happy people do not treat others bad. she is using your sister to get at you, blamin you for things. take no notice.
I had the same thing in my children my mum was all for my sister. I know what it is like and it is not your fault, it is nothing about what you have done, my mum did not want me as a baby as she had an affair. Forgive her and move on and know that God loves you and you are special. he loves you very much. She is a messed up woman you need to pray for her and forgive her for treating you wrongly. and putting you down. read these books they will help and remember you are loved.

Answer 3

Your mother is toxic! Just because you are related to her, you don't have to have a relationship. Is the promise of owning a house someday worth the heartache of maintaining a relationship? Do what is best for YOU...not what you think you're suppose to do or feel guilty about doing.