I am a 14 year old male and my mother has recenty been going out a lot and neglecting me. I have my own life too. Its just important that I have a good relationship with my mother. I dont want to endup hating her one day.
2007-02-16 19:49:29 · 22 answers · asked by Jaye 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Sit her down and really try to talk to her. She sounds like she is kind of young? Kind of let her know in a nice way that she is a mother and as terrible of a wakeup call it may be, it's not her time to go out and have fun anymore, she needs to wake up and realize that you are her kid, and you aren't happy with her habits lately. Be nice about, let her know that you love her and so you don't want to have a bad relationship with her. If it gets too bad try going to family counseling, sounds like a goofy idea, but it should help you guys be closer and more understanding with eachother, the relationship doesn't sound open enough, if you ask me. Good luck, I hope it gets better (:
2007-02-16 19:54:23 · answer #1 · answered by lejumpsuit 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wasn't going to respond because you have some good answers, but then I saw the ones saying "be a man"...How ridiculous can people be?...you are 14 years old, still a child. However, you are mature enough to realize how important a good relationship is with your parents...something many 14 year olds lack. I would sit down and write her a letter explaining how you feel. Don't be accusing or try to make her feel like a bad mom or anything, just explain how you feel, and that you just want some time together. Tell you love her and miss the time you two used to spend together. If she doesn't respond, or if does so negatively, you will have at least expressed yourself. Writing down your feelings is very therapeutic for you and it may open her eyes and heart up a little and make her think about the situation. Best of wishes...and don't worry about what people said about "being a man about it". Those kind of answers aren't given with much intelligence behind them. Best of wishes....
2007-02-17 04:06:15 · answer #2 · answered by sassy_395 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound like a very mature and wise guy. It is very important that you communicate exactly what you wrote here with your mom. YOu can either find a private time for the two of you and sincerely share your feelings with her, or write her a nice letter.
You can also ask her out and make her realize that you enjoy spending time with her.
If this doesn't work and she neglects you again, as you are growing up try to be the bigger person and let her be. I know you are still young to be without your mom, but sometimes life is not as we hope or plan it to be. I'm getting the feeling that she's a single mom, right? Is she young as well? Maybe she feels like her youth is passing by and she's missing out on life. I really don't know what your situation is, but if she is young then try to understand where she's coming from and let her feel good about herself without the guilt trip. You will be fine dear, there's always a happy medium and I"m sure once you talk to her you'll be able to find it.
2007-02-17 03:56:16 · answer #3 · answered by Shelley S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk To Her And Tell Her How You Feel. She May Not Realize What She Is Doing Then Have A Day Where You Guys Do Something Together Just The Two Of You Good Luck
2007-02-17 03:53:40 · answer #4 · answered by ♥Lin 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am Soo sorry to hear that. You still need your mom, your only 14 years old, and your problem the parent and she acts like the child. Anyhow, if your mom has been recently been going out a lot, then possibley this can be resolved. Sit her down and talk to her. Tell her what you are telling us here. At 14, you SHOULDN'T be having to look after yourself, and having your own life. That is just crazy and dangerous.She can get in trouble with the cops as well if she is leaving you home alone. If she doesn't change, continue to go to school and go about your life, stay away from people who are gonna influence you in the wrong way. Please. You don't want to be a dad at 15 and you don't want to be in jail at 14 and you don't want to be an addict at 14 either. Let me tell you something. There is nothing out there in the world for you son at 14 years old. It is hard and cruel out their, and only the strong survive and the weak perish. I know you love your mom, but the best gift you can give yourself is your health and education. Please listen to me. Ive been there..I know.
2007-02-17 05:10:54 · answer #5 · answered by RAW AND GRIM \,,/ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to her about your concerns. Tell her that it's OK for the two of you to have interests/friends/whatever of your own, but having a good relationship between you two is just as important. Maybe you can set aside one day of the weekend or one evening of the week which is mother-son-time, where you two go out and do something together.
2007-02-17 04:19:03 · answer #6 · answered by Liz 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know how you feel. My mom started dating when I was 15 and she would even leave my brother and I alone for a month at a time to go stay with her new bf. Plus she brought new guys home all the time and I ended up putting locks on my brothers bedroom and mine. Talk to a school counsilor about how you feel. If your mom leaves you alone for the weekends, its going way to far. You are still a baby *sorry : )* and you need to have a healthy relationship with women. Just because your mom leaves you I dont want you to grow up thinking that ALL women will leave you. Thats not how it works! Talk to your mom also maybe. tell her you miss her and you want her around more, if she does nothing then go to a family member or a close friend adult and tell them whats going on
2007-02-17 03:56:58 · answer #7 · answered by I hate stupid ppl like you 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
At 14 you still need your mum around and it is nice to know that you actually miss her. Why don't you try and talk to her about it and both of you have to compromise and see what you can come up with like she goes out on certain days and other days are for you 2 to sit down and talk or just spend some time together. Let her know how you feel and that you miss her.
2007-02-17 04:03:18 · answer #8 · answered by jimmychick78 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
The bst way to have a good relationship with your parents is to talk to them. Tell your mum how you're feeling lately and work something out that allows you to feel like she's around and allows her to have her freedom. Mum's need to go out and have fun too and it can be a shock for the kids when it happens. My mum did the same thing when she got divorced and after a while i spoke to her about it and she cooled down her partying. Just sit her down one night and have a chat with her. Don't be agressive or angrym just talk to her.
2007-02-17 03:57:02 · answer #9 · answered by Alyeria 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tough question.
I'd say, go out, have your own life, but try to connect with her in some way, sometimes. Try asking her how things are going, take interest in her life (whatever is going on). If she ignores you, then there's not much you can do at this point.
But try that approach first. Be the more mature one and take the initiative and try to take an interest in what's going on with her.
2007-02-17 03:54:47 · answer #10 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋