what do you think?

Question

everyone tell the funniest joke you know!

im bored, lets pick it up a little bit

if you are afraid you might get reported, email me! :)

Answer 1

A blonde wanted to go ice fishing. She'd seen many books on
The subject,
And finally getting all the necessary tools together, she made
For the ice.
After positioning her comfy footstool, she started to make a
Circular cut
In the ice. Suddenly, from the sky, a voice boomed,

"THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE."

Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, poured a
Thermos of
Cappuccino, and began to cut yet another hole. Again from the
Heavens the
Voice bellowed,

"THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE."

The blonde, now worried, moved away, clear down to the
Opposite end of the
Ice. She set up her stool once more and tried again to cut her
Hole. The voice came once more,

"THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE."

She stopped, looked skyward, and said, "IS THAT YOU LORD?"


The voice replied, "NO, THIS IS THE MANAGER OF THE HOCKEY
RINK"

Answer 2

the funniest one i will get reported for so i will tell the 2nd funniest....
a duck walks into a pharmacy and asks the pharmacist "do you have any grapes?" the pharmacist says "no, try the grocery store down the street" the next day the duck comes back to the pharmacy and asks the pharmacist "do you have any grapes?" the pharmacist says "i told you try the grocery store" the next day the duck comes back and asks the pharmacist " do you have any grapes?" the pharmacist says "I TOLD YOU TO GO TO THE GROCERY STORE! IF YOU COME HERE AGAIN ASKING FOR GRAPES IM GOING TO NAIL YOUR FEET TO THE TABLE!" the next day the duck comes back to the pharmacy and asks "do you have any nails?" the pharmacist says "no" and the duck says "then do you have any grapes?"

Answer 3

A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a genie comes out.

The genie says, "I'll give each of you just one wish."

"Me first! Me first!" says the administration clerk. "I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world." The genie snapped his fingers and poof, the woman disappeared.

"Me next! Me next!" says the sales rep. "I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life." The genie once again snapped his fingers and poof, the man disappeared.

"OK, you're up," the genie says to the manager.

The manager says, "I want those two back in the office after lunch."

Answer 4

A first grade teacher was trying to stimulate creative thinking in her pupils. She stood in front of the class with her hands behind her back and said, "I'm holding something behind my back. It's round and it fits in the palm of my hand. Who can guess what it is?"

Billy's hand went up and he asked, "Is it a baseball?"

"No, Billy," replied the teacher, "It's not a baseball. But you're thinking, and I like that."

Suzy's hand went up and she asked, "Is it an orange?"

"No, Suzy," replied the teacher, "It's not an orange. But you're thinking, and I like that."

Then Johnny spoke up: "Hey, teach, I don't know what you got in your hand, but I got something for you in my pocket. It's long and hard and pink on one end."

Shocked, the teacher cried, "Johnny, that's disgusting! You march yourself to the principals office right this instant!"

"Hey, relax," said Johnny. "I was talking about my pencil... But you're thinking, and I like that."

Answer 5

CHICKEN HAIRS

A boy and a girl were behind a barn one day. The girl told the boy, "I have to quit eating chicken, because I am growing chicken hair.

The boy in disbelief said, "Let me see."

So the little girl pulls down her pants and panties and shows the little boy her chicken hair.

"You sure do! " the boy says. Then he says, "I have to quit eating chicken because I am growing chicken hair too."

The girl says, "Let me see."

The boy then pulls down his pants and underwear and the girl says, "It's too late for you, you already have the neck and the gizzards."

Answer 6

Look here. The asker's joke was pretty good, but also look at the one in my answer.

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;_ylt=AiwwvYmV0rmRinp30OsnHEjsy6IX?qid=20070110212415AAgHjEo&show=7#profile-info-9eed7e422beabe0ee5d6fb00110b5799aa

Answer 7

If I could rearrange the alphabet I'd put F and U together...

Answer 8

Why don't indians eat sushi? Because Sushi sh**ts her pants!!Just so u know, I'm part native!

Answer 9

swimming is a funny sport cuz sometimes you do it for fun, and other times you do it to not die. Sometimes when I'm swimming I don't know which one it is.....gotta go with the outfit........pants.......uh oh! swimming trunks....OK! naked.......we'll see..... -Demitri Martin

Answer 10

My sister is Katie T and she is a *****. lol.