I mean my family birthdays and just the whole family thing. It is really annoying as my family think he doesnt like them and I am sick of the excuses I give as to why he doesnt come with me and our daughter. I love seeing the family! We have been together for 9 years and married for 3.....Just after some ideas on what to do if anything? No silly answers either thanks....Be SERIOUS!
2007-02-16 18:14:35 · 16 answers · asked by Jassie's mum 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
The parties are my nieces or nephews but they are NOT kiddie parties where they have their freinds there. They are for the family. Not to gossip....so godzilla get a grip! If men dont want to go they miss out!!
Thanks to those who gave some great answers. Will be hard to choose!
2007-02-16 21:12:51 · update #1
Also I see it as we are a family and we should go as a family. (me hubby and 22month old daughter) But if he wants to miss out, its his bad luck
2007-02-16 21:14:04 · update #2
I've been with my man for 12 years and he is very unsociable. Not only with my family, but even with his. He's just not sociable. I used to make excuses, but screw it. I tell everyone he is unsociable and that's that. He's a great guy, so I can overlook this. It's his biggest fault and I think I'm pretty lucky. He could be a drug addict, alcoholic, wife beater or he could be too sociable which would be a whole other issue. So, don't make excuses, tell the truth, point out that this is how he is in general, that it's not personal. I love to socialize and talk, so I do. I don't let his lack of social skills effect me. Good luck1
2007-02-16 20:01:01 · answer #1 · answered by lisa-loo 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I WILL be serious, as a man, I know exactly where he is coming from, and I cheer him for it. He is tired of all the drama, gossip, nosiness of families, families are so overrated, all they care about is what you have, own, spend, blah blah blah, maybe he's tired of being around all this nonsense, this is what I believe. this is why he doesn't go. Tell him Godzilla said he is a smart man. The problem is, every time a kid takes a crap there's a party, leave him alone, let him watch football and just be a man. Don't you think you're a little too old for all these childish parties? grow up already, I know so many women like this.
Parties are for kids, not adults.
I say cheers to him.
2007-02-16 18:58:32 · answer #2 · answered by godzillasagoodman 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My hubby doesnt go to my family (dad side) functions. And there are several reasons why. Most of them have never been very nice to him. He is very outspoken and most of them can't stand that someone would come into their family gathering and say something they dont' agree with. They also think I should never have married him, though he is about the nicest person you could ever meet and also very protective of me and our children. He also gets very upset when one of them tries to tell me what to do on anything....which they do quite frequently!
Another reason he doesn't go is because of health reasons, he has a very bad back which makes famiy functions very hard, no matter which side of the family.
I would never make him go to one of these get togethers. I do ask him if he wants to go and he usually says no, which is fine with me. I wouldnt like it if I felt forced to be in an environment that wasnt pleasant.
2007-02-16 18:42:53 · answer #3 · answered by who_me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't give you any answer, but I wanted to let you know that you are not alone. We have been married fr 30 years and my husband hates to go any family function, especially if there is food there because if I don't cook it, he doesn't want to eat it. It embarrasses me so much that I don't even ask him to go anymore. I wish you all the luck in the world to change him.
2007-02-16 18:19:18 · answer #4 · answered by Dyan 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LOL
my hubby is like that too
he hates going to see his or my family...but his issue is he doesn't like crowds or anything
he also prefers just being at home w/ me
but he knows how much i love my family, and how much i love spending time with his family too, and how much more i enjoy it when he's there so he goes. he knows if he goes he'll get a treat afterwords either get to see a movie he wants, an awesome dinner, maybe even some love making.
LOL
make it worth your husband's time to go to, make sure he knows how much it means to you...tell him you're tired of having to make up excuses and stuff.
2007-02-16 18:22:23 · answer #5 · answered by kaeh 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well personally I would quit making excuses for him. Why don't you let them call him up and ask him themselves why he is not there. Put the ball in his court. Why is this your responsibility? Let him be responsible for answering the questions. You should totally detach yourself from this. When your family ask why he is not there, tell them you do not know and and tell them to ask him. Then just leave it alone and go on with your party and forget about him.
2007-02-16 18:20:09 · answer #6 · answered by purplegroovyrose 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Encourage him, but deal with it. He's probably not that much of a family person or at least an extended family person. You should have known this before getting married. My lover enjoys going to all his family functions, but I hate going to these sorts of things, so much that I won't even enjoy our own wedding. Maybe you and your husband can find a compromise like that he'll show up for a limited amount of time.
2007-02-16 18:18:52 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
My ex husband didn't even like being around his own DAUGHTER'S birthday...The one and ONLY time he attended a birthday party for his daughter was when his parents decided to show up one year. Out of the 16 birthdays she had while we were married her father attended only ONE.
2007-02-16 18:32:22 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
My boyfriend doesn't like to go to family birthdays and he didn't like to go to his ex wife's family birhtdays either. The first reason is that he doesn't like big groups of people. The other is that he thinks the family doesn't like him. He doesn't like being around them because he has nothing to talk to them about. The last reason is that he's an only child and his family didn't do holidays so it's not a tradition for him, like it is for me and for his ex wife. I don't really know what to tell you, I just wanted you to know that you're not alone.
2007-02-16 18:20:48 · answer #9 · answered by princesskellyann925 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Attending family birthdays is silly. Do your own immediate family (spouse and children) and maybe another every now and then but to expect constant attendance at these usually boring events is total BS. We have better thing to do that attend such nonsense.
2007-02-16 18:38:29 · answer #10 · answered by Montreal 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋