We've been great friends since H.S. (14 years)
We've been through alot of hard and of happy times. But she is going through a very rough time and I don't know what to say/do to make her feel better. My heart aches for her, but I'm at a loss for words. Her husband of 8 yrs left her this morning w/o saying anything, just left a letter, and even though he psychologically & verbally abused her all along & once even physically abused her she feels very sad/depressed. She had expressed wanting to end the relationship but never did. They have an 8 yr old son.He has never showed love for the boy either. She called me crying earlier today and is going to call out sick from work tonight 'cause she says she needs to see me & talk. What advice should I give her, what can she tell her son, what can I do to help ease her pain. I've been married for 12yr & she has expressed how she would like to have a relationship like mine Please help.Serious answers only
Thanks in Advance.
2007-02-16 06:31:11 · 3 answers · asked by hilda c 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
I'm so sorry to hear that this has happened to your best friend. From the sounds how her husband treated her and their son. I'm sorry to say but, I'm glad he's gone. Your friend and her son deserve better than that. Regardless, I know this will be a tough time for her and the boy. For starters, I'm glad she has you to lean on and it may be for awhile until she's back on her feet with her life. You being there for her right now will help. As far as what to say.... I would think to say that you will be here for her anytime no matter what and as far as her pain goes. That in all will take time......she will just have tackle it one day at a time. If there's things she likes to do or go somewhere whether it be with you or her son. It's a suggestion. I don't know if she has family that should could also lean on too. Either way, it sounds like it will take awhile before she feels better about things. I've been there so I know. I really hope this has given some idea and I'm sure with you being there will definately help her a great deal. In time she will move on and I'm sure she will feel better about herself and having her son, she has such a very special gift having him and things with her life will get better. When it's fresh it won't seem like it but, in the end as the days go on. Your friend will be happy if not, definately happier. One other thing I should mention considering your friend is married. I don't know what the husband is up to as far as legal separation or divorce. But, later on not tonight, sometime after that I would mention it to her cuz you never know what the other half is up to and she should seek legal advice. I just don't want your friend to get slapped (expression) with anymore surprises that will upset her further. This way, she's prepared one way or the other. I so hope this helps!
2007-02-16 06:47:23 · answer #1 · answered by ********* 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best thing to do is listen to her right now. With the wounds being fresh, she may say or do some alarming things and these are the places you need to step in. One thing to keep in mind is the many stages of emotions she will go through, she may even show anger towards you and your marriage. Don't take things as personal attacks towards you. Offer supportive words but don't trash talk the man, especially not in front of the child. I hope this helps a bit. Good luck to you and your friend.
2007-02-16 06:42:29 · answer #2 · answered by JB 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sweetie there really is nothing you can say or do... this is something she needs to deal with... just be there for her to talk to and listen... it sounds to me that in the long run this is going to be a good thing for her to get away from him. Good luck and I will be praying for her and you.
2007-02-16 06:42:18 · answer #3 · answered by A Friend 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋