Why is it that people think sleeping with there boyfriend is such a necessary thing? How come you can't just date him and fall in love with him and then when you know you're going to marry the guy then it's worth the wait is it not? Plus, whats the point of giving yourself away to someone who you know you're not going to be with forever. Otherwise there's so much baggage when you enter the marriage and it's not fair to your husband. And of course the obvious it that we weren't created for that, it wasn't God's plan for us to sleep around with whoever whenever. (Don't get me wrong, i'm not perfect but what i have done were mistakes and they're full of regret)
2007-02-16 05:27:23 · 18 answers · asked by cm 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
In my opinion, you should not marry someone because the sex is good. You should look for other positive things and sex just comes as a bonus. The reason why marriages in USA don't last long is because the basis of getting married is sex. In other countries where the culture does not allow sex before marriage, marriages seem to last longer because they fall in love with the person and then get married.(without pre marital sex).
2007-02-16 05:32:33 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
you're telling me? I was 14 and I was raped. Not stachetory, but RAPE rape. I have a six year old and the reputation to go with it now. Well, I'm 21 and have been dating the same guy for two years, and we decided to have sex. It hasn't been the same since and I regret it, even though he still treats me with respect, he is now wondering why i was okay with it the first time and not now. He isn't upset that i want to wait, he just keeps thinking he did something wrong or I like someone else. it is very difficult to wait, and people can say that ammna will cheat if hes not getting it from you. I have had a few guys like that, but this one is different, and I'm glad i've made my decision to wait. I don't need STD's, drama, worry, or any of that. Any man that is a REAL man will respect that and respect you for not being easy.
2007-02-16 05:41:21 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you say "when you're going to marry the guy" do you mean, when there is a ring on your finger? or when you think you'll be with them forever? B/c even if you are engaged, it can still get called off. And there are a lot of teenagers out there who think they're going to be with that person forever.
A lot of people just don't know what love is, and then a lot of people just want to get laid. Just b/c you have sex doesn't mean there's a lot of baggage.
Personally, I waited until I knew I was mature enough to handle it and that it wasn't pressure or anything else influencing me.
And...why does this question seem geared towards girls? Why aren't people trying to persuade guys to wait until they truly love someone before they have sex. Ooops! I ranted. Sorry.
2007-02-16 05:34:33 · answer #3 · answered by Nicole N 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Because sex is a huge part of marriage - either rightly or wrongly and people want to make sure they are compatilble in bed and out. It does create some baggage - but not always. I think it should be up to the couple to decide what is right for them.
2007-02-16 05:32:46 · answer #4 · answered by wild_orchid_tx36 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Nothing wrong with that. When I married my first husband I was a virgin...as far as I know he is the worst lover I ever had. We got along well as friends, but in bed...no way. It ended up in divorce 6 months later. I have been with my new partner for 10 yrs (still not married to him) and he is great in and out of our bedroom.
2007-02-16 05:37:42 · answer #5 · answered by maggie209 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
sex is simply a component of a healthy relationship, and if you have not "tested" this component, how will you know how sexually compatible you are with your partner?
Furthermore, why do you assume that having sex will create "baggage"? This is simply a consideration that you have! Sex, by itself, can be a beautiful act, and it does not have to entail any sort of negative, long-term, emotional "side effects".
Also, just out of curiosity, how do you know that that wasn't God's plan? Did he not endow you with organs of pleasure? Why would they be there if they weren't meant to be used? Why do you have a clitoris? Why are you denying yourself pleasure?
I'm not advocating promiscuity, but in my opinion, there's no need for utter abstinence, and, in fact, I believe abstinence to be harmful in the long-term.
2007-02-16 05:33:47 · answer #6 · answered by robinski21 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I hate virgins...Virginity is such an awful thing. I would never want to have sex with a virgin... seriously - even if she was the most beautiful person on the planet and was offering it on a plate...
sexual compatibility is not guaranteed, just because you're both 'pure'. It is not guaranteed just because you're both in love.
I wouldn't make that sort of long term commitment without being pretty sure of compatibility in EVERY area
2007-02-16 05:35:54 · answer #7 · answered by Vinni and beer 7 · 1⤊ 3⤋
basically marriage in the past intercourse is marrying your better half then having intercourse. intercourse in the past marriage is if truth be told having intercourse in the past getting married to that individual. for my section for me, i've got self assurance in intercourse in the past marriage, because of the fact i think of in the adventure that your in a dedicated & wholesome relationship which will at last lead into marriage then have intercourse all you like & it additionally relies upon on the adulthood point of the relationship and how severe each and each individual is with reference to the relationship, yet widely used it incredibly is only my opinion.
2016-11-23 13:19:06 · answer #8 · answered by zell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah it hink u may be right....
but some ppl may think i love them and this is the person im going to spend my whole life with but it results that yall brake up a year later well is not ure fault but at least u loved him when u did give it up....
but i agree with u!
but u never know where life would take u...
2007-02-16 05:31:11 · answer #9 · answered by val09 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is all in your own perception. If you marry after having had sex and do not think of that you can start your love life for real whenever you please. Forget the past, it does not exist unless you want it too.
2007-02-16 05:32:38 · answer #10 · answered by bigjohn B 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋