Out of control student?

Question

I'd really appreciate advice from teachers here.

My husband is a new substitute teacher. Kids love him! He has had no problems (if anything, he's had great success!) with any of the classes he's taught up until now.

But he recently took a long term substitute position for a class that hasn't had a full time teacher all year (long story there). Most of the class is okay except for this one boy.

This kid refuses to take tests or do any classwork. He will just sit there and stare into space. He cries and throws huge fits (he's 7) when asked to do work. He never does his homework, and has fallen way behind the rest of the class. He simply wont take any instruction from his teacher no matter how many principal visits he recieves or calls his mother gets.

His mother says he's fine at home, and doesn't know what to do. She says she takes away privileges when the teacher calls her with these reports, but the kid is still not showing up with homework......My husband is going nuts.

Jillary, I'd appreciate if you got off your high horse. There are 19 other kids in his class who are loosing "teacher time" because of this one kid.

Answer 1

this kid is experiencing severe emotional detachment...your husband should get the counselor/school psych. involved asap...i have a girl with similar problems in my 6th grade math class but her parents refuse to sign the papers to have her put in a special ed. or inclusion class where they can help her through her problems...since she doesn't have an iep we have to hold her to the standards we hold other students, but she is barely working on a 3rd grade level...she is angry and acts out violently towards the students when she is frustrated...she often starts fights in the class so that we can not go on with the lesson because she can't keep up...you can not talk to nor reason with her because she throws herself on the floor and screams...he has to bring in someone who can write this up and begin the process of having this child evaluated before he becomes old enough to hurt someone when his outburst become more violent...

Answer 2

be kind, show the boy respect... ignore his bad behavior focus more on what he does well...

i ahve found that when you have a well thought out plan, have excellent literature and activities to do... even the most unwilling will come around... smile, be friendly, ignore his fits as if he were a retarded kid who is included in the class.....


be firm, have set expectations...

"Here is what we are going to do...."

Use peer tutoring, have the kids show him what to do... "Johnny, go show Stevie what to do" Sometimes they respond better to their classmates.

Dont harp on him in front of the other kids... talk to him quietly and in private....

Have firm expectations, clearly defined consequences... dont take it personally.... read to those kids
make time for literature... a 1st grade kid should be getting at least five (no less than four) books read to them in class per day.
Then let them draw a picture of their favorite part of the book.

If you are taking his recess away then I would highly recommend you stop doing that.

Sometimes tehy just want to talk and play
They are made to be quiet so much of the time.
I always like to start th emorning allowing anyone who wants to share a quick something with the class to do so, then I make a quick positive response.

7 year old little Johnny has his hand in the air, yes he would like to say something.
"Last night my dad went to jail for hitting my mom "

"Well Johnny taht must have been very scary, I bet that he learned that he shouldnt do that. I bet tomorrow will be much better"

That really happened.


They are little people with stuff on their minds. You have no idea what is going on in there. If your husband is 'going nuts' over a 7 year old... that might be part of the problem, that he is taking it personally.

Answer 3

My mom is a teacher soon to be retired. I which I could call her on this one because she seems to be very good at this type of situation. Its an art form..

This kid has some problems. If calling the mom and the Principal is not working then this means there is something else going on with this kid. Both the parent and the kid need to see a counselor to get to the root of the problem. It could be that the child has a special condition or is going through some hard times at home. It seems to me that this is best left for people that specialize in child psychology and they will be able to suggest a course of action.

Other Than this all I could say is keep the boy busy. When handing out papers to the whole class, have your husband ask who wants to pass the papers around. All the kids Will say me me me so that's when your husband chooses the problem kid. On another day have your husband bring some candy to class. Ask some questions and reward the kids for participating. At the end of the class still give candy to those kids that did not get any when the questions where asked. This is because nobody likes to be left out especially kids. In short do a lot of activities that don't seem like work and pay extra attention to this one kid. Don't force him to do too much. Is not the same telling somebody to pick up the crayons. Is better to ask who wants to pick them up and put them away for the class. It makes them feel special and important. Then put a star next to his name on the wall to show that he did good.

The star system or happy face syste works great with kids. You can reward stars or stickers for different things kids do. For answering questions you could give 1 star. If they get the answer right then it could be 2 stars. The idea is always to reward and never take away. You give less stars or more stars but don't take stars away because that is punishment.

Well, those are the tings I have seen my mom do in her class when I go visit her.

Good luck.

Answer 4

Wow, being a long term sub can be tough. Your husband is basically in the same position that a first year teacher is in. It helps a lot that he's substituting in an elementary school. There are a few thing s he can do.

Every school has some sort of new teacher support network. Most new teachers get official mentors to guide them. Unfortunately, long term subs are often overlooked in this. Your husband can ask for a mentor. The person would be a veteran teacher and probably has tricks that will help him deal with this difficult child.

If your husband has a good relationship with the administrator, he can ask the administrator to come in and observe for a class. This would be just to give advice and suggestions on how to de-escalate the kid's behavior. All administrators used to be teachers, and in their deepest hearts, many miss teaching, so usually they're happy to come in and share their ideas.

If the student has other teachers, your husband should talk to them and see if they're having the same problems. If they aren't, then he needs to listen to them and find out what's working. If they are, then it's a great time to have a team meeting with the student's parent. You can come up with a behavior plan that will be enforced in all of the child's classes. Sometimes, meeting face to face with the parent exposes important information a phone call doesn't.

I would consider reporting the child for Special Education testing. I know it's extreme, but if nothing's working, then this child could be starting to exhibit a learning or behavioral disorder. Often, when kids have a learning disorder and can't do the work of their peers, they try to hide it by being defiant. It's a lot less shameful to be the "bad" kid than the "stupid" one--and that's how most kids think of their learning disorders before they are diagnosed.

As for in the classroom advice, I would begin by meeting with the child. Sit down and talk to him, and ask what's going on. It's amazing what effects a child. His parents could be fighting, he could be overwhelmed at school and home. You husband has probably already done this, but if he hasn't it could unearth a simple problem. I would suggest doing this in a non-threatening way. For example, if your husband holds the child back from an encore class (music, pe, etc) to talk to him, then he should make sure it's one the child doesn't like so the child doesn't see it as a punishment. During the discussion, your husband needs to get down to the child's level--standing or sitting high above him can be scary. At the very least, he can learn what interests this child, and tailor some teaching to that.

There is a chance that at this point, the child is so far behind, he fears he can't catch up, and he's given up. You husband may want to consider going back a step with this child, and having him learn independantly for a bit to catch up. Even if the boy doesn't catch up completely, he's more likely to do work if he feels successful than if he doesn't.

Consider moving the child to the front, and giving him a little extra attention for positive things. I don't know if the kid's too bad for that, but sometimes that can help. I like to thank students in my toughest class for little things like getting out their paper--"I appreciate X for having his paper out."--and it cracks me up how many students love just that little praise.

I guess lastly, remember that kids need consistancy. If this class has had a bunch of different teachers, they are in a turmoil. This boy may just be really sensitive to change. Your husband needs to make sure that for a while he follows the same routine--starts class the same way, uses the same indicators for appropriate and inappropriate behavior, is consistant with praise and punishment, etc. If this boy is sensitive to change, this consistancy will help over time.

Finally, please realize that improvements takes time. No matter what your husband does, the boy won't change overnight. He'll have good and bad days. But, over time the good should outnumber the bad. If your husband is subbing in elementary, he already has the patience to succeed at this. Good luck!

Answer 5

The mother doesn't care. The teacher needs either one a reward system ;send home a timer and a form to have the boy fill out three nights a week along w/ finished homework w/ immediate rewards, no punishment he is already immune to that. Also don't forget recess and specials are a privilege for students if the teacher really cares he will sacrifice his time to work with this child one on one when the work is done the child is free to go. The teacher is this child's only resource right now it is up to your husband how far he wants to go most teachers aren't really willing to sacrifice there own time for a student.

Answer 6

I would try an awards system where EVERYONE in the class can get something, as long as EVERYONE does it. Hopefully, the other students will try to encourage the boy to do the assigned task. If He makes it an ALL or NOTHING, then maybe he will be motivated to do the task. Also, if he (husband) can give the kid some sort of award for some small detail, and keep encouraging this kid, that might be a great help.

Answer 7

Well, since it's pretty obvious.. no kid in the world, especially 7 year olds, want to do homework or take tests. :P

But to get serious and in-depth..
Did you ever think the kid might be dyslexic? Maybe he throws tantrums while doing it because he simply just doesn't understand it? It's something I'd look into instead of having random people from yahoo! answers bitching out some kid's mother when it might not even be her fault.

Answer 8

This boy sounds like a learning disability, it would be best if he were removed from the class and put into a special program so the rest of the class can get on with learning.

Answer 9

If I were him, I would talk to the principle or a counselor and have the student evaluated. It may be that the young man is "testing" his new teacher because he thinks he can control the situation, but if he isn't learning it will only effect him. The young man needs help!

Answer 10

At 7, my child will do his/her homework. Because I sit next to him until it gets done.
However, if the child isn't coping with school work, maybe there is something wrong and he needs to be assessed. I urge your husband to pay attention to this child, because if he falls behind now, it will affect the rest of his school life.