Should fathers stick with their children and guide them?

Question

in the recent events taking place in south london (3 shootings in the last few weeks), should fathers who have a child, guide them and teach them the rights and wrong of life?

in todays culture, there are more and more single mothers who tend to their children on their own, and work at the same time to feed them. but the children do not have a father figure and have no one to look up to for guidence. most children end up in the crime scene and lead a stray life, without any loyalty or respect to others.

little is being done by the childs father, and they are missing throughout the childs life, fathers should be there for their children and look after them and teach them as a real father should, not just have sex and totally disregard what happens next.

Answer 1

i totally agree with what your saying. But people turn a blind eye to the fact that some of these fathers try their hardest to get access, even take things to court because the mother does not allow the father to see the child out of bitterness because the relationship didn't work out (this happened to my partner) and they have no choice but to not have anything to do with that childs life, it is heartbreaking and disgusting, and the fathers are then seen as uncaring and pigs. Yes, a child DOES need a MATURE father, especially a young boy, it is very very important, especialyl these days.

Answer 2

If they weren`t there, then you can`t blame them for teaching the kids wrong. Has to have been someone else.

IMO the parents`job is to give birth and other than the bare necessities simply get out of the way.

This also doesn`t say much for the school systems except for a few such as the one that has been named the best in the world by the United Nations, the Waldorf started by Rudolph Steiner.

Teaching guilt to kids is the worst thing one can do for them. ^No Johnny! That is bad!^ Teaching them fear runs a close second. Actually they are really the same, aren`t they?

Answer 3

In the USA the problem of not having a father in the home is exactly the same as it is in the UK. Without the presence of a father in the household, a family does not exist. The definition of a family is a father, a mother and one or more children. The father is head of the househoild, and it is his responsibility to provide support and guidance for the rest of the family. In situations where the father does not live with the mother, the mother should insist that the father be present part of the time to provide guidance and a role model for the child/children. My mother was forced to head the household when I was 8 years old because of the death of my father (by natural causes). She remarried 5 years later and the family was restored. Boys need a father figure to help them into manhood. Girls need a father figure as a safe haven from their mothers (mothers and daughter will, by instinct, fight with one another, and a father is the only effective mediator). Not all fathers are good role models and thus are not fit always to be around children. I pastor in the Texas prison system, and one thing that I have learned is that no matter what an inmate has been convited of his children are very important to him. Unless a man is totally out of it, unless he is totally depraved, a mother should never deny the father of her children access to the children. Women will often do this thinking that they are protecting the child, when in fact they are doing more harm than they realize, harm that will haunt both father and mother in the future. Children are very perceptive when it comes to their parents and they do not forget or easily forgive what has happened to them because of the absence of a parent.

Answer 4

I can understand that you are trying to say that having a male role model (especially a father) is a benefit - but at the same time you are being very unfair to the mothers that bring up these children. If the fathers try to help their children then that is great, but I come from a family that didn't have a father because he was too selfish to care, therefore it's men that have such attitudes who should consider taking more responsibility over their children. And I think the Preachers idea of a family is very archaic, a family does not have to be the 1950's idea of one - families come in all shapes and sizes.

Answer 5

Children need both parents or a role model from both genders because we learn how to behave towards others when we are young. Whatever role models our children see whilst they are impressionable they will become like them good or bad, it's called reaping what you sow.
It shouldn't be down to one parent to bring up a child but both even if they don't get on with each other, it is their responsibility and yes absent parents should be made to not only support financially but morally, emotionally and spiritually as far as they can towards their child, it is a child's right to expect this.

Answer 6

Your last paragraph is wrong in many cases.
My son would love to have everyday contact with his daughter, but the mother moved 200ks away to make it hard for him. Also, she ignores the family court directive to make daughter available once a month.
So his daughter is growing up without a fathers guidance, and that is not my sons fault.
I know of many other men who have the same problem.

Answer 7

Yes,they should but it's not always possible..Some mothers,sadly, make it impossible for the father to be part of their childrens lives..I have 3 grandchildren i don't see because their mother moved away with them and has continued to be obstructive..I feel for absent fathers because it isn't always them to blame..Children are used as weapons in a battle between parents and ultimately,it's those poor little devils who suffer.

Answer 8

I absolutely agree, fathers should be made to play as much as an important role in a child's life as their mother, even if they are separated. Also they should be made to pay fro their children's up bringing or go to jail, simple as!
Fathers have rights YES they do and they should be inflicted on them

Answer 9

a father figure is really important..you definitelty hit the point...these children turned out to be dysfuctional due to improper or lack of guidance,discipline, or no role model at all....because of this, peers/ environment has a greater influence, ...family values, honor, respect , morality have become thwarted.....

Answer 10

i think children is responsibility of every body, so it is job for every elder lest to teach them what is good and what is bad, no matter it is your child or it is not. do not wait until they done mistake and guide them.