The first time me and my husband had sex it was so painful for me that we had to stop. We tried it again for a couple of days, but it was just too painful. A few days afterwards he had to leave on deployment and I wont see him till June again.
Im so scared of losing him because I feel like I cant please him sexually. Im also scared of this stupid pain going away.
I feel that if I continue like this he will get tired of it and leave me or cheat on me.
He says that's never going to happen because he married me because he loves me not for the sex and that we will take it slow next time..
Even though he says that I still feel like he'll get tired of it. I dont know what to do. I hate this pain
2007-02-15 20:26:04 · 12 answers · asked by uhhh 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
is this pain because you were a virgin?
believe and tyrust that he did marry you because he loves you
atleast he cared enough to stop when you said it hurt you...
he does love you and you have the rest of your lives together to establish sex and enjoy it.
and any man that would say that aint going no where he loves you too much you, are the love of his life,dont let your insecurities get in the way.
that feeling is normal to woman who havnt had sex before,but once you get used to it,the pain will go away and so will the insecurities
2007-02-15 20:36:39 · answer #1 · answered by ? 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First, go to a female doctor and find out if anything is wrong.
Second, find ways to have sex that don't cause pain. There
are many ways to have sex other than vaginal intercourse.
There is a lot of fun in finding out these ways. Relax when you
are with your partner. Don't concentrate on anything, just enjoy
touching each other. Some things come natural when you
enjoy them. If he says he loves you then you got a good one.
I don't think he will cheat. Just try your best to love him in
everyway you can. If you don't see him for awhile, write him
letters saying how much you miss and love him.
It might help to read books and get as much information as
you can for your problem also. There could be so many
factors contributing to your pain. Dryness, He's too big, You're
too small, Not enough foreplay, ect.
2007-02-15 22:11:07 · answer #2 · answered by white_willow_wisp 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your doctor about this and get checked out. There may be something medically wrong here. Also did you have an orgasm before he went inside of you? A woman has to be wet and well lubed before and during intercourse or it can be VERY painful and sore for her. Did he make sure you were very wet and ready when he entered you? My husband makes sure i am lol and i love it and sex does not hurt me . It is quite pleasurable and enjoyable when he makes sure of this. Dry sex hurts really bad. Do not feel worthless over this hon you just need to learn how to do it the right way. Also if you were a virgin this is why it could be so painful as well.
2007-02-15 22:04:46 · answer #3 · answered by Lady Hewitt 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a medical reason you are experiencing pain during intercourse It's not something you can control and it's not your fault. It sounds, by what you say, that your husband really loves you. I would recommend that you make an appointment, with your gynecologist, and find out exactly what is causing the pain and what can be done to fix it. I hope your husband comes back safe and sound!
2007-02-15 20:41:20 · answer #4 · answered by Chihuahua Lover 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if i am reading this right you had sex for the very first time, and it hurt, it usually does. Good for you for waiting. the two of you should have more foreplay, and like he said take it slow, it will work it self out. you can buy about a 100 books, and read on-line other things to help. You can even learn some things to do while he is away.
2007-02-15 21:51:38 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make an appointment with a gynocologist. Something more may be going on and you need to find out what it is.
2007-02-15 21:03:19 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
after you make an appt with the doc and if you find out everythings normal go get a vibrater dildo whatever stretch yourself out a bit he sounds like a HUGE guy in that area you might just need to stretch yourself out
2007-02-15 20:34:37 · answer #7 · answered by vamp_19772001 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are not worthless.
Find ways to relax. I think that your restlessness in areas in your life is affecting your sex life.
2007-02-15 21:56:26 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make an appointment with your gynecologist
2007-02-15 20:31:12 · answer #9 · answered by Marsh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well sooner or later you will need to make the sex thing happen or you are right he will either leave you or cheat.
2007-02-15 20:31:19 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋