me and my boyfriend havea great sex life buti just cant orgasm???we talked about it and dat, so we decided that it will be ok if i dont have an orgasm....whats wrong with me????am i doing something wrong???
2007-02-15 19:59:04 · 14 answers · asked by Mal S 1 in Health ➔ Women's Health
i tried by myself as well but its weird as if i dont know how to finish off.if that makes sense...
2007-02-15 20:07:06 · update #1
Might I suggest a session alone with yourself first to see if you truly have a problem with experiencing an orgasm or if it's something beyond this. Explore yourself in several ways using your hands or toys you might have. Find what movements around the genital area pleases you most, and see if you can accomplish a fulfilling orgasm on your own.
If you are able to do this, then you may look into other methods. Relaxing is entirely different from staying focused. Some people experience racing thoughts (which is generally called anxiety in one of it's forms) and this can effect your sexual focus with your partner.
You may also generally not have an attraction to the opposite gender. I am not trying to insult you or be mean by saying this, but it has been known to be the reason a woman or man could never achieve orgasm during intimate sessions. Safely explore your sexual world and see if you can rule out things for yourself.
Try new positions. You may be sticking to missionary, which does not provide enough stimulation for some women, especially those with tilted pelvises. If your partner doesn't feel insulted by the idea, then add some sexual toys to the scene and use them or have your partner use them on you while you are having intercourse.
Visit a few sites on sexual tips, tricks and advice. There are plenty of them out there - more How To sites and books than the world truly needs to be honest.
If nothing you do does work ultimately, you may consider consulting with a sex therapist to see if s/he can help you to uncover the mystery. It may be expensive to do, but well worth it in the end if you can achieve orgasm with your partner. Orgasms are incredibly relaxing, bring two people much closer together, and keep your life stress-free and happier. Why else would God give them to us? :)
Good luck to you!!
2007-02-15 20:06:17 · answer #1 · answered by EyeSpy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your relationship is probably new, so there's a lot of emotional intensity to it that compensates for your not having an orgasm. If your partner and you are both enjoying your sex life, orgasm or no orgasm, I'd say just relax and continue to enjoy it. Don't try to fix something that's not broken. However, when or if you do feel that something is missing, do acknowledge it. It's great that you talk to your partner about these things. If you can communicate, everything else (learning how to please yourself, teaching your partner, etc.) will follow.
2007-02-15 20:43:47 · answer #2 · answered by praha 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Your not doing anything wrong the more you fret about it the worse your going to be you have to relax
Why not try to give yourself an orgasm when your alone , Remember a orgasm is unique for each woman so maybe you have already experienced one
but don't realise you have so Just relax
2007-02-16 01:47:55 · answer #3 · answered by Black Orchid 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
no you're not doing anything wrong, it could be a lot of things. it could be him, it could be stress, and some girls just can't orgasm during sex. experiment with oral sex and see if you can orgasm that way.
2007-02-15 20:03:14 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say get comfortable with your own body first. Find out what you do best for yourself. Then, when you find what works for you, tell him, "Hey, I got an idea! Let's try this!" and instruct him to do for you what you already know works.
2007-02-15 20:03:18 · answer #5 · answered by Phartzalot 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
het ur boy friend to go down on you!!!
will definatly do the trick!
lots an lots of foreplay is the remady!
lye bak an enjoy!
2007-02-16 02:35:38 · answer #6 · answered by babypink_2 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
its all in the technique, many women, myself included cant orgasm during intercourse, it wont happen if your tense, manual stimulation from your boyfriend should do the trick
2007-02-16 01:24:28 · answer #7 · answered by chakra girl 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Keep on trying by yourself it will happen,it did for me, then you can tell your partner how you like it, it is worth the wait
2007-02-15 22:04:52 · answer #8 · answered by Janet C 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
may i ask if you can make your self have one when you are alone?are you able to identify your clit?get it wet and rub it think about thedirtest things you can can you can do it sweety
2007-02-15 20:05:16 · answer #9 · answered by lynn g 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe there's something wrong with him? Not necessarily you.
2007-02-15 20:04:36 · answer #10 · answered by Barbara Doll to you 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋