Figuring out who I am?

Question

Did you ever get so cought up in life, like being a Mom, keeping up on the house, being a wife, bathing the dog, paying the bills, School plays with the kids, and all the other things that life gives....

then one day some thing happens that makes you step back and you have absolutly no idea who you are.
How do I find my self after 10 years of doing whats right? Of course i still want to do whats right, but I also dont know who I am.

some one asked me what I like to do for fun... I was stumpted, I have no idea.

where does a person begin when trying to find them self?

Answer 1

i feel the same way.

Answer 2

You know that is a question i think most of us ask ourselves at one time or another. But you know u only have 10 yrs in ,so dont let another 10 go by like many do and not find yourself . And it was nice to read your question and know i asked my self the same thing when i was ask what do i like to do or for fun i didnt have a clue. sad but life becomes a routine and we forget that we are a person also. So i wish you the very best , and maybe you will be able to answer that questionyou were asked. :)

Answer 3

I am a mom too and have days much like yours. You express yourself in everything that you do, especially in how you interact with your children. Every time they have a problem that you help them work out, you are expressing yourself and who you are and what's important to you.

Now -- as for hobbies -- look through an adult education catalog and see what interests you. You may be surprised -- there are usually so many offerings that you may end up wanting to take watercolor painting, life drawing, flute lessons, Dutch. I know I'd love to take some of these, but unfortunately many of them are night classes. But see if you can't find a class that will fit in with your schedule. I took French last fall and it was fun! Try a sport that looks like fun. Where I live, ice hockey is popular for women, and it's easy for beginners to take it up. Tennis?

Also -- there's volunteer work. You're probably already volunteering for school, but you could check out other volunteer opportunities in town that interest you.

Happy hunting!

Answer 4

Know the feeling. been married for 27 yrs when he left. Spent 24 of them raising bunches of kids and being someones mum. Bit of a blow to realise that after that time its really all i am. Now I have hobbies that I enjoy and surprise surprise my kids get involved in them too. So its become like a growing curve for all of us together. We are all learning how to change mower blades, keep the green out of the pool etc. Out of the house I am still mum but I know that there is a lot more to that than it appears and the biggest thing was learning that growing does not stop at any age. Hope it works for you too because it has led to a really contented life and closer relationships for the kids and me.

Answer 5

its tough being a mom, but that is why God gave the job to women because He knew we could handle it and men couldn't.

when we signed on as parents, we gave up our right to think of ourselves before others! our first obligation is to our children and our husbands. and as you are finding out it doesn't leave much time for ourselves.

i often wonder about this question 'how do i find myself?' and what does it truly mean. i hear a lot of people asking it, mainly women, and in hindsight it seems to be that question is the beginning of their breaking away from their families, of a conscientious decision to become self-centered and put themselves ahead of everyone else. i hope this isn't where you are headed.
trying to balance your need to find some time for yourself and your obligation to nurturing and caring for your family is tough and require a great deal of compromise but it can be done, and keep the family happy and intact.
start slowly.........get a group of gal pals together and go out for dinner one night......not a big fancy restaurant and NOT a bar, but a nice place where the lot of you can have dinner, and visit with each other. if it works out then establish a night out once a month with them.
when the kiddies are in school try getting to the beauty salon, even if its just a wash and blow-dry.........there is just something so soothing about having someone else wash your hair. its a real treat. or a manicure....whatever....a little pampering really does help.
the library! do you read very much? head to the library and spend a little while finding just the right book. even if you don't read its a wonderful sanctuary......peaceful and serene.
swim.......do you swim, hit the aquatic center or the beach. its a great stress buster.
if you like shopping.........go shopping.....even if you don't buy.......just wander about the shops, have a coffee, and unwind.
of course all of this is supposed to be without the children, it should be just about you enjoying yourself without sticky little faces smiling up at you and tugging at your skirts.
if you can manage to do some of these things i think you will find yourself feeling better, a little less frazzled, and having time to not have to think about anything!
good luck with it.............and if all else fails just keep reminding yourself they will grow up, they will leave the nest and eventually you will have all the quiet time you could ever want.

Answer 6

Bless your heart! Im a Wife, Mother, Grandmother, business woman. I know exactly what your talking about. Somewhere between baby, diapers, teens, dogs, baseball practice, taxi cap, bills, doctor appointments, shoping to save what pennies we can, we become the answer to all the families problems. Or worse they blame us for any problems we cant seem to fix or solve.
Then before you know it they have all grown and were there asking ourselves who are we and what do we do from here?
Trust me when I say decide on what you have ever wanted to do and do it. I did that and I now have a life of my own. I still do whats right for all of them including letting them make their own mistakes and making their way in life.
Whats fun to you ? You have one life dont waste it and now is the time to find you.
Start by looking about you of things of intrest. Local Tech schools have all kinds of classes. From fixing a car to floral design.
I started a business and I love it and trust me it took the family a bit to adjust because I wouldnt let it go. Ive found me and my business has taken off and much to my husband, kids, grandkids, amazement and they now are saying they never thought it would go as it has. If its education your seeking alot of collages are funding women/ men like ourselves for free.
This old crazy world dont come to you, you have to go find your place in the world and get what you want. God Bless

Answer 7

Most guys are wankers, so I've got a fair idea what what I'll find with a bit of soul searching.
I think all mothers have to put themselves last to some extent, after a while you just get used to doing what everyone else wants.
Sometimes doing something for someone else will tell you a lot about yourself. I read a story about a housewife who went to asia to help save bears... i think she found out who she was.

Answer 8

honestly you have to take a break.. i mean, really take a vacation.. then turn to the One who created you because He know's what your created for. But hey, then again, sometimes things just get too familiar. Like being a mom. Being a mom maybe pressuring, but it's also a huge blessing right? Having your kids gives you stress but they also give you joy. Sometimes things get too familiar they become frustrating. Take a break, turn to God, then be back with a loving vengeance.

Answer 9

I was once in that same situation. the only thing that i can say is read the bible. begin to ask God to help you, He created you and knows you far more than you can ever imagine. seek Him deligently and you will find what your looking for. but i know this for a fact....God has placed you with your family---your a wife, a mother, and obviously a responsible person......you have a ministry in what you are doing for your family. oh and something else dont expect to recieve all the answers at once, you wouldnt be able to contain it...i am finding myself in God and soon you will too. just ask Him, no one can help with this only He can. GOD BLESS YOU / GOOD LUCK! SEEK HIM!!

Answer 10

You and millions of other women get this feeling--you need to prioritize your day---just so much time for each job---and time for yourself has got to figure in. You have the toughest job--as a homekeeper---almost a 24 hour position--so be proud to do it---just learn time allottment techniques. Brush your hair 100 times--take a nice walk, find a hobby or find a creative outlet--anything to do something for yourself---and be proud and stand tall for who you are....smile and good luck.....

Answer 11

Find some place quiet, Meditate and let the feeling come to you. God is there, and all he asks is for you to seek Him, and he will guide you. Maybe what you are doing "IS" the fun for you, right now. Children are the love of the earth, don't be selfish, it is for God that we walk!