Ok. Last night I posted that we were thinking about adopting 4 little kids with very ethnic names, and probably giving them American names. Everyone jumped all over me with "how could you even think about doing that?" Then tonight, I posted one of their names as a "what do you think of this name?" and everyone jumps all over me about how she'll "get picked on" all her life and "bullied" and "will become a great poet," etc.
So which is it? should I let her get picked on or should I change her name?
2007-02-15 15:17:30 · 11 answers · asked by Gabby_Gabby_Purrsalot 7 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Baby Names
I'm not playing games. All you have to do is look at a previous posting to see one of the names that I'm concerned about. I'm just trying to get feedback.
2007-02-15 16:22:07 · update #1
Oh by the way, due to privacy reasons, I don't want to post the entire sib group's names.
2007-02-15 16:36:16 · update #2
Compromise. Keep their name and give an American nickname. For instance My great-grandpa imigrated to the US from Italy. He changed his name from Prettinelli to just Pretti because it would be easier for Americans. So perhaps you could Americanize what they already have.
You could use their real name as a middle name or give an American middle name keep their first then call them by their middle. My sister is married to a Kyrgys man. She is pregnant and they intend on going back and forth to Kyrgystan. They are giving the baby two names. Abigail for in America and Aidarem while in Kyrgystan.
Another thing you could do is find a name with the same meaning. I had a neighbor that was Vietnamese. Her name was Hong, it meant Rose so that is what everyone called her.
If I was in that situation it would depend on their ages what I would do. If they were younger it wouldn't be a big deal to just change it. If they were older I would just come up with a nickname as teen and preteens already are having enough of an identity crisis but at the same time they would be able to tell you their opinions on it and maybe even help you come up with something they like too. I don't really know though. My 11 month old knows his name and it I suddenly called him something different I don't know how he would respond. It is a very difficult situation for you. My sister used to say "call me Anne instead of Corrie I like it better." Then I would and she would ignore me or I would forget and call her her real name. I am sure with the adoption you will have an experienced case worker. Perhaps they can tell you something of the details in their past cases. Regardless, your job as a parent is to protect them, and for me that means trying to keep them out of situations that would harm them, including from the agony of teasing. So good luck.
Another thing you could do is find a name with the same meaning. I had a neighbor that was Vietnamese. Her name was Hong, it meant Rose so that is what everyone called her.
2007-02-15 15:35:13 · answer #1 · answered by pebble 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok, I don't know why they'd jump like that. I have a friend currently down in Columbia working to adopt a young girl, something she's been working toward for years. It's a proud moment, and yes, they may have to make some changes to their personal lives for things to work.
As for names, I know a couple of different Asian-Americans who have their "Asian name" which is the formal name printed on the birth certificate, and the "American name" which is the name that they go by. Like, let's say you're adopting a girl names Ababbacaraba. How about using the American nickname of your choice that goes along with that name??
That's what I'd do. Good luck!!
2007-02-16 00:16:33 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would give them new first names but leave their original names on their legal documents. Who cares if they have four names? It will be nice to have all of the names for those kids.
Unless the old names are just awful. I know someone who adopted a little guy and his name on his birth certificate was BabeeBoi. No joke.
2007-02-15 23:23:55 · answer #3 · answered by Katherine 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
MOST KIDS HAVE NICKNAMES THEY JUST WIND UP WITH SOMETHING THAT FITS THEIR PERSONALITIES AND IS USUALLY A TERM OF ENDEARMENT BETWEEN THE CHILD AND THEIR FAMILY.WHY DONT YOU GET TO KNOW THE CHILDREN FIRST SO YOU AND THEY CAN MAKE AN INFORMED CHOICE TOGETHER LIKE FAMILIES SHOULD DO.GOOD LUCK WHATEVER THEY ARE NAMED ARE CALLED DO SO WITH LOVE AND KINDNESS AND IT WILL BE GOOD.
2007-02-15 23:30:52 · answer #4 · answered by dixie58 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do what you want and don't listen to anyone else.
I would have told you that last night too, if I had seen your question. If you want to name them American names, that is great.
2007-02-16 01:56:51 · answer #5 · answered by Tenn Gal 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would do what you originally planned and give the children American names. Many adoptee parents do that and then they use the childrens original names as their middle names. :)
2007-02-15 23:26:55 · answer #6 · answered by Dorth 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would give it a chance. I would wait until she actually gets picked on. Depending on where you live, she might not...I know where I live names were never joked around with. When she gets older, she might want to chage it, but let her decide.
2007-02-16 00:10:46 · answer #7 · answered by missknightride 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I can understand your reasoning for wanting to change thier names. Children are cruel. What would be something inocent to us can become something hateful for child to make fun of. I say change it, she'll thank you.
2007-02-15 23:25:31 · answer #8 · answered by Sunshine 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you just ask us what we think about the names and tell us them and how to say them and I'll tell you if I think you should change their names or not but I'm not playing your game it's like you are starving for attention. Just tell us the names and ask our opinions and we'll tell you and you can move on and we can all move on too.
2007-02-16 00:07:48 · answer #9 · answered by Angelica 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋
change her name
2007-02-15 23:21:01 · answer #10 · answered by myfirstbaby 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋