She joined Winterguard and she has practice after school everyday and she never has time to hang out with me anymore! It is like she cares about guard more than me! And this is a 4 day weekend for me b4 school and she has practice every freakin day! She doesn't care that we never get to hang out! It makes me sooo mad cuz guard is all she does anymore! GRRR! Please help me! What should I do!
2007-02-15 14:02:18 · 21 answers · asked by Ashley 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
Its very common to find that one person that you "relate" to best. I think most of us have been in that position at one time or another. And really, there just isn't anything as great as having that one best friend that knows you better than anyone, likes the things you like, feels the same way about things, and you can talk about absolutely anything, anytime.
Unfortunately, eventually we have to move on to other things in life. Put the shoe on the other foot, so to speak. What if you suddenly found out that you were fairly talented in art. And all of a sudden all you wanted to do was paint and draw, and talk about painting and drawing. My point is, what if you found another outside interest other than just hanging out with friends. It wouldn't mean that you didn't like your friends any more. It wouldn't mean that you didn't want to spend time with them anymore. It would simply mean that, as chance had it, you stumbled across something else that you also like to do and now you want to spend some of your time doing that too.
I think you should give your friend some space. It does hurt when you feel like you have been shut out. But the truth is that she has just decided that she would like to participate in winterguard, she likes it, its fun, ect, you should be happy for her. Instead of seeing how your friend is growing and experiencing life you are condeming her for not continuing to spend all her time with you. That doesn't make you strange, by the way, its a normal feeling, its just that your feelings are misdirected.
Find another outlet for yourself, join winterguard, take up a new hobby, go out on a limb and force yourself to make some new friends. In other words, experience life yourself instead of expecting your friend to help you have fun. Otherwise you will sit around feeling miserable and lonely because this one person, out of all the people in the world, isn't with you. And if you don't see the trend here, its that this situation tends to be "all about you". And, well, its not, and its not that way for any of the rest of us either.
I hope this has helped.
2007-02-15 14:26:07 · answer #1 · answered by GK 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dont know what winter guard is but you should jsut tell her that you want to hang out with her even if it isnt very often. She shouldnt jsut totally ditch you for winter guard. You should organize to go to the movies with some other friends and ask if she wants to take a few hours off of training and come too. Once she realizes that you arent sitting at home waiting around for her and are out and about doing other things with friends then she will not want to be left out herself.
Can people please answer my most recent q on my profile. For some reason every q I post wont appear in the new q list which I am very angry about. Its a good q and I need answers
2007-02-15 14:06:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hi -
Sorry to hear that.
Unfortunately, that's what happens when you start work, and have a busy life.
I would tell her how much your friendship means to you. It may sound corny if your not that type of person, but it will let her know you really enjoy being her friend, and having her company around.
You can "wing" it and say it in a "cooler" way if you want to.
I was use to hanging out with the same friends every day, all day, for years.
We got jobs, and now I never see them any more.
The only thing you can really do, is let them know you enjoy being their friend, try to squeeze in some time with each other every month, and look for new friends.
I know it's the type of feeling of "I don't want a new dog, I want my old one!" But, there are some REALLY cool people out there that you haven't met!
Good luck, and hope everything works out!
2007-02-15 14:08:24 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It's hard when friends are pulled in directions that take them away from you. You have to realize that she made a committment to the Winter guard, and though she still has some degree of committment to you as a friend, the Winter guard has placed demands on her that she can not back down from. I'm sure your friend is counting on you to be there for her, encourage her to succeed and do well in color guard, and support her when she needs it from you, and be happy for her that she has been given this opportunity to participate in something she enjoys. Don't be so hard on her,Guard doesn't last forever, but friendship's do.
2007-02-15 14:09:07 · answer #4 · answered by restless_nymph 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If I were you, I'd probably join Winterguard, because considering how close you seem, I think hanging out with someone else is out of the question.
2007-02-15 14:05:06 · answer #5 · answered by The12thMan 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That`s too bad. Like the earlier replies you could join Wintergaurd with her. If you have no intention of joining then you should just leave her be. During your lifetime all of your friends will have something they`re dedicated to. I think it sounds selfish you that would want to take her away from something she enjoys doing to hang out with you. Go get a new friend to hang with, it`s easier than waiting for your friend to come back
2007-02-15 14:15:52 · answer #6 · answered by __»color me copper.. 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find a new friend who can hang out with you, or join winterguard.
Throughout life friendships will change. Some friends will have new priorities in life and will spend less time with you. You may not see friends for years.
That doesn't mean they can't be your friend. They're no longer every day hang out friends.
2007-02-15 14:05:32 · answer #7 · answered by FCabanski 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Jealousy can kill a friendship faster than anything!!! Be happy for her and find something for yourself!! Practice does not last all day try to make plans afterward!! If she has an excuse then there is a deeper issue!! You are probably much better off without her!!
2007-02-15 14:07:55 · answer #8 · answered by jacah5 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you enjoy spending time with her that much then join winterguard as well.
2007-02-15 14:05:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anthony F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe tell her that you want to hang out more and if you guys are good friends then she will miss a practice to hang out with you. I hope i helped you. Good Luck.
2007-02-15 14:06:36 · answer #10 · answered by la_rules_4_sure 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋