i work in an environment where it is second nature to hear the word 'gay' being used as a derogatory term on a daily basis. This deeply offends me that my colleagues are using a term that describes a condition of life for me as a synonym for 'bad', 'crap', 'awful', 'stupid' etc.
How should i handle this? I have mentioned it a couple of times & asked people not to use it, but i dont want to be seen as the one always 'flying the rainbow flag', so to speak. I want to be treated as an equal to my peers, not any different, but at the same time cannot put up with this kind of prejudice!
I have spoken to my boss & he has raised the issue also, but it continues...
Advice please!
2007-02-15 10:31:21 · 15 answers · asked by Saffron 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I would start keeping a notebook (secretly of course) of the names, times, dates, and remarks of what is said. After a period of a month, I would ask to speak to HR and your boss. At that time, I would whip out the notebook and tell them of every incident that has occurred and ask what they plan to do about the situation.
Good news if you do that - they wont fire you (too afraid of a lawsuit at that point and if they do LAWSUIT) and it should put a stop to it.
Look at it this way, if your co-workers were saying Black this and black that - work would put a stop to it. Why should they be different because of the term 'gay'.
Good luck.
2007-02-15 10:38:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 6⤊ 1⤋
You need to go to HR. Say that you went to your boss and he mad an issue of it and it was ignored. Praise your boss to the HR person for doing so and don't give names of those why are using the word gay that way so it doesn't end up on their records. Just ask for maybe some official training on the subject or for litterature to be handed out saying that its not acceptable and a reportible offence since it's discrimination in the work place.
Also, look for your local GLBT organization and contact them. There may be a better way to handle this than what I've said or they may tell you what legal action you can take if it continues.
You DO NOT have to find a new job. You leaving because of this is the same as a racial minorty leaving due to constant racial slurs being used. It's a violation of your civil rights and it should not be tolerated.
Good luck. However, if the job isn't worth all of this then find a new one.
2007-02-15 10:41:44 · answer #2 · answered by Shelley 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you're working in an office full of twats to me! Only school kids and Chris Moyles use the word 'gay' to describe something that is rubbish etc. If you have mentioned the issue before and they still carry on it sounds like they are doing it deliberately or are trying to goad you. You could be working with a load of homophobes! I seriously hope not though.
Turn round some insults at them.. any blonde girls in your office? Why not imply that they are stupid? That will annoy them after a while. I'm sure theres some fatties and the eternal diet women there? Tell them they're greedy and ask if they've put on weight. There will be a fault you can pick with everyone at your work - so why not pick and see how they like it?
2007-02-15 20:43:18 · answer #3 · answered by Sam 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could politely ask them not to use gay in a derogatory manner around you. If they take offence to that and claim that you are 'flying the rainbow flag' then they are showing their true colours as homophobes: this is not your responsibility. Keep clear about what is your responsibility and what is their **** and do not get drawn into debates, if you are offended, you do not need to justify why, it is their responsibility, they caused the offence.
2007-02-16 03:07:34 · answer #4 · answered by tysonian22 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
human beings generally use the word "gay" in strategies that are basically stupid. there is not any longer something that makes a shirt gay or underpants gay or any of that stuff. gay used to propose "happy, jolly, crammed with mirth, exciting loving". it is going to definitely grew to become a code word for homosexuals to apply between ourselves so as that we would no longer be "chanced on". Now the word has grow to be just about a definition for "gay guy". the unique meaning of the word is, regrettably, just about long gone continuously. i do no longer ideas being referred to as "gay" via fact i'm basically that; yet i think of it is fully stupid and ignorant for human beings to apply the word in strategies that are patently no longer the meant meaning. that's a manner of putting something down whilst it is used that way. all of us comprehend that, even in those present day cases, gay human beings are appeared upon in our society as "below" all and sundry else. So whilst somebody says, "Oh, it is so gay" they generally propose that it is grotesque or stupid or stupid or something alongside those lines.
2016-10-02 05:15:12 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You could start equating 'straight' with being square, narrow-minded, conservative, uptight, anally retentive ... you get the picture. If they don't like it, you can always point out that you are doing the exact same thing as they are doing, resorting to negative stereotyping, and as they didn't have a problem doing that to you, you didn't think they'd have a problem with you doing that to them ... if you can get this across to one person, then you'll have already made a significant difference.
2007-02-15 13:06:11 · answer #6 · answered by Orla C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Language evolves, homosexuals adopted the word gay, corrupted its original meaning, and killed a small piece of the English language. Now it has become a replacement for "naff", and the usage is growing. That's life. Did you complain at Poetry`s loss, or the disappearance of a lovely girls name, when `Gay` was perverted? Tough! Now you know how lovers of the English language feel !
2007-02-15 11:20:51 · answer #7 · answered by ED SNOW 6 · 1⤊ 1⤋
I guess you can ask people not to say it around you. I use the word Gay alot like thats gay or something but if I knew it hurt someone's feelings then I'd just say it when they aren't around.
2007-02-15 10:44:14 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the worst evil is commited by those who witness evil and do nothing to stop it!
why would anyone treat you differently for standing up for a cause. i speak about this subject frequently at my highschool and i feel strongly that if you have an opinion, (that doesn't hurt anyone,) you should voice it!
2007-02-16 10:44:50 · answer #9 · answered by Narry 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Man don't take it personally; there is no harm in it. If you ignore it people will respect you more for not being a drama queen. My brother says it occasionally and he is the least, homophobic guy ever - we share a room, always asks to see who I'm dating, ect...
2007-02-16 08:04:25 · answer #10 · answered by life_aint_a_game_10 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋