What do you say to your husband of 5 years when he "forgets" you on Valentine's Day?

Question

My husband and I have been married for 5 years and together for 12 years. He didn't even acknowledge me with a card for Valentine's Day this year. This is the second time this has happened. Three years ago he also "forgot" me on Valentine's Day, my birthday, and Christmas. What do I say to him? I'm not looking for gifts - but a card, a flower, or just some sort of an acknowledgement that he loves me would be nice. I'm heartbroken and these actions have made my family question if he really is in love with me. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

I wouldnt take it personally....My husband called me from overseas....the day before ( it was V-day there though ) but on previous years we have both been guilty of forgetting ! One year we both forgot our Anniversary ! Sometimes life just gets in the way....Not a big deal :)

Answer 2

get over it!!! some men do some men dont. do not end your relationship because he is forgetful. and as far as being acknowledged does he come home to you? does he sleep next to you? it does not sound like he is cheating on you so what are the odds that he loves you. you might need to remind him that v day is coming and your birthday and christmas give the guy a break OH MY GOD in 12 years he has forgotten 2 times you really are making a mountain out of a mole hill. all men forget **** and why should yours be any different men that have been married 20 yr still forget their wedding anniversary and birthdays well some men even forget their kids birthdays and they are there when that happens. all you have to do is remind him i am sure he is not doing it on purpose. stop being so stubborn about it. and your family can get stuffed if you love him and he loves you then that is what it is about. not gifts and cards and crap!!!!! you say that you are not looking for gifts but you want a flower or card or something. that my friend are gifts.

Answer 3

alongside the lines of the BJ suggestion, i'd incredibly say something which you do no longer generally do for him would be a great deal favorite, and because that's a holiday (supposedly for romance), he will know that that's a particular party that for the time of trouble-free terms occurs as quickly as a three hundred and sixty 5 days, and he shouldn't anticipate it the different day, yet right this moment. Now, that doesn't unavoidably propose that it basically must be a mattress room journey. it is generally assumed that the guy in trouble-free terms does the cooking on holiday trips, yet whilst he's the single that chefs popular, you may make it so as which you prepare dinner on the holiday trips. If he supplies massages 364 days out of the three hundred and sixty 5 days, right this moment is his turn. You get the factor.

Answer 4

Wow, I'm so sorry to hear that he's upset you so much. Men just don't get it do they? They think women are so high maintenance, when all we want is to be acknowledged by our husbands. If you haven't spoken about it already, maybe all you can do is to express how much it hurts you that he "forgets" you on all the occasions where he should typically be putting a bit of thought into how to surprise you. Naturally, you need to do the same for his birthday etc. If he's not the type to book a restaurant or suggest a movie, why don't you say something like, "Would you like to make it up to me and take me to dinner and a movie on Friday night?" I know it's awful that YOU have to suggest it, but at least you get what you want even if you have to ask for it.

Answer 5

I understand your situation because I have been on both sides of this. First let me say Happy Valentines to you anyway ;)

There are two approaches you could take depending on where your relationship stands in a situation like this.

It might be too late now, but in the future, you could do something extraordinary for him. Find something he would love and then give it to him. Make it "his" day. If you make everything so wonderful for him with out asking anything in return, he'll feel guilty about doing nothing for you. That is if he is still truly in love with you. Next time he won't want that terrible feeling of not making you happy and he will strive to make the next time a day for you too.

But now the day has passed so your second option is to write him a letter of how you feel. Tell him how it hurt you that he "forgot." Let him know that you thought he cared for you and would want to express his love to you like you want to express to him. Then end the letter by telling him that you want to talk about this when he is ready and that he can come find you. Then give him some time to read, gather his thoughts, and come to you to talk. Don't push him to open up. If he still doesn't come to you to talk, then you probably have more serious relationship issues than whether he forgot you for valentines day and you should look into seeing a relationship counselor.

Answer 6

This is a tough question. My first reaction was to say that Valentines Day is just a commercial holiday that candy and floral and card companies make tons of money from. BUT... the fact that he's forgotten other major dates says that something is up. I'm not going to say that he doesn't love you, but there's a reason why he's subconciously ignoring these important days. You need to have a long, sit down discussion with him, and tell him why these days are important to you, and just how hurt you are by this... he needs to know! He then needs to examine his heart, and figure out why this is happening. I hope he gets it! Good luck! :o)

Answer 7

No excuses, men have brains. I could understand forgetting one holiday but all of the one's you listed?? He's sending a loud message, he doesn't care. If I were you I would sit down with him and have a very serious discussion about where the marriage is going. It's not unreasonable to expect a card or a simple verbal acknowledgment of the event.

Answer 8

say nothing show him grac but dont let this go un punished take his card and go get yourself something nice but not over board dont want to go in debit too much then send himm a thank you card for the gift lol he will learn the price of forgetting!!

Answer 9

Men are not really interested on Those stuff, so this could be an excuse.However he should respect your needs as much as you should. Try talk to him and explain your needs and be flexible..say that he is not obliged to remember dates just to show you his feelings, would you matter if he had a surprise for you on 20th of February?

Answer 10

Ask him if he forgot V-day. Hopefully he'll be something along the lines of, "Oh! I forgot." And think of what to get you the next day. That's what I'd do at least.