A.So, here’s the deal..My husband is becoming super-secretive as of late. Yesterday when he was in the shower he forgot to take his cell with him and it started to ring. I answered and a man called and identified himself from Proflowers and asked for my husband. I stated he was unavailable, can I take a message? He said it was about his account and to please return the call. I thought maybe he was actually being nice for once and ordering me flowers! Well, I told him and he denied up and down that he had placed an order and musta been wrong number and everything..well yesterday came and went and no flowers to me..soooooo..I am now realizing that he placed an order for someone else. How can I find out who he placed an order for? He has a hundred email accounts and hides his passwords on everything and I no longer have access to the credit cards because he hides those too. I have no more time for his bullcrap and just want to leave him. We have a little boy and I am not going to let him
2007-02-15 09:22:24 · 18 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
do this to us anymore..I tried asking him, talking..he won't open up. His citizenship is pending right now through me and I know that's his main concern if I find out what's really going on..
2007-02-15 09:23:18 · update #1
If you need the proof actually staring you in the face, then hire a private detective. If you want to stay married to him, if you love him, then be prepared to find out something nasty. Also, if you find out that he is cheating, are you prepared to do something about it? Some women like to find out the truth, then make their lives miserable by wanting to keep the marriage in tact and always asking "why". If you are prepared to leave him, then hire a private detective, but be prepared for the outcome too. Make your plans now, decide what it is you will do if you do find out he is cheating. If you only want to find out so as you will having something to complain about, then dont do it. If you are like me and you need an honest relationship, then do whatever you need to do to find out the truth. I know I could not live with someone who didnt love me exclusively....I could not be second to another woman.....its totally dishonest.
Whatever you decide to do, be prepared for the outcome and have a plan in mind.....but that plan must be in the best interests of you and your son......and if you find out he is cheating and it is unacceptable to you, then obviously the marriage isnt going to last and your son wouldnt be happy anyway in a home where the parents are unhappy.
Its a horrible situation for anyone to be in. I hate not knowing and I get the impression you are the same. Find out the truth, it is the only honest way to live......I wish you the very best.
2007-02-15 09:32:28 · answer #1 · answered by rightio 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Oh my goodness, looking at this from the outside looking in, it is obvious he is being unfaithful. The phone call alone should have tipped u off, and u said he isn't nice to you either.
He don't deserve u girl. Stand up for urself and be a good role model to ur son. I know the feeling, not knowing u should leave but wanting to hang in there and hope they will change, but when it comes to this u can't do anything if he wants to be a male whore that is what he will be.
save urself the heart ache and pain it will cause in the future and get ur things together and do ur own thing, us women are strong and I know u know he's being unfaithful and using u for his citizenship like so many men do (it happened to a friend of mine).
ur worth so much more and I know u will find a man who will love you and be nice to u and ur son.
U both deserve a man who will love and cherish you
2007-02-15 09:32:56 · answer #2 · answered by lamikashi 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Can't you open the mail when it comes in, the credit card company would be mailing it to your address? Check if anything shows up as being purchased in Proflowers. There would be a monthly credit card statement showing all purchases made.
I would go to Proflowers and pretend that I am here to put some money down on his account, does he have a personal bill or use his credit card?
2007-02-15 10:21:22 · answer #3 · answered by Emily L 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he is not willing to talk to you about what happened then he is obviously not willing to work out this situation. Either the guy was calling for him for a specific purpose, like to meet up later, for whatever reason, or your right, he did order flowers for someone else. It sounds like your hubby is very secretive at the least. I think you should leave him and see what happens. If he wants to work things out with you he will contact you and open up. If you want to leave him I think you should because there is no reason to stick around. He's up to something, you just don't know what.
2007-02-15 09:54:43 · answer #4 · answered by blue 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
His citizenship is not your problem. This man is hiding things from you. He's not being honest, AND he's sending flowers to someone else. What more do you need to convince you to leave?
Your little boy doesn't need to see that marriage is built on lies and distrust. Instead, teach him that it takes a strong woman to stand up for herself. Be that woman. Wouldn't you rather your son learn how to treat women from you? His daddy's not a very good example!
2007-02-15 09:31:43 · answer #5 · answered by katydid 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like this guy is using you to get his citizenship...I would call back the flower company and ask for the address where they were suppose to be sent to...if your nice about it..you might get the info your looking for...good luck
2007-02-15 09:55:54 · answer #6 · answered by Laceyfromcali 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he may have a second life somewhere with another woman, you'll never know...
He could be just using you for citizenship.
Don't let him take any more of your life, you should leave him if he can't be honest with you...
2007-02-15 14:44:14 · answer #7 · answered by Jasmina 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to really think about your situation...what good would it do to find out about the flowers...would that make you leave him? It sounds like you already have plenty of reason...forget about the flowers and take care of yourself and your little boy!
2007-02-15 09:39:14 · answer #8 · answered by avechm 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is obviously having another woman, at least one, on the side. Get him out of you and your son's lives. What kind of man is he going to teach your son to be? You can replace him with a man that will do you and your son right. Dump him and send him back to where he came from.
2007-02-15 09:31:31 · answer #9 · answered by HereIAm 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Just leave him. Sounds like he is using you to get citizenship. Also seems like you already want to leave him and want a GOOD reason. Truth is wanting out is a good reason if your not happy tell him to take a hike.
2007-02-15 09:28:00 · answer #10 · answered by ian 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋