We have been together for 11 years, he's been an addict the entire time. I did file for divorce a 1 1/2 years ago, but never went through with it. We were seperated for almost 1 year at that time. He just came home 3 weeks ago from being at rehab for 5 months. He has already relapsed more than once! IN THREE WEEKS he has already relapsed. I think it may be time to end this marriage, can anyone help me see the light at the end of the tunnel? We have 2 kids 13 & 8.......
Thanks, I appreciate your help.
2007-02-15 08:52:40 · 10 answers · asked by Nichole 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Sorry to hear of your troubles.this is a terrible situation, and more heartbreaking, there are children involved.
If you love this man, get him out of the house. Letting him stay is enabling him. He needs to lose everything, to even begin to find himself again......he COULD stop using drugs, if he truly wanted to.
I wish you every good blessing to you and your family. I have dealt with this in my life too....and I know it is not fun. God bless.
2007-02-15 08:59:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he cared that much, he'd never have tackled you to the floor - especially while you were pregnant. You're taking your unborn baby out of a dangerous situation. Sure, he's upset now you're gone because he never expected that you'd leave. He thought he could keep going as he was and you'd still be there. It's fine to love somebody, but you need to love yourself more than someone who would treat you like that. Imagine going back and down the track having your child witness one of his outbursts. Horrifying for you, But what about a little kid? You certainly need to look ahead. I know you're against divorce, but having a child grow up in such a toxic environment like that is so much worse. You have an obligation to make sure your child is safe at all times. And that you stay safe to be there for It.
2016-05-24 04:30:22 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorce him. With a drug addict comes the lies and in some cases abuse. Your children and yourself should be your first priority. Your kids DO NOT need to be exposed to anymore of the addiction than they already have. Kids don't learn by what you tell them...they learn by example. They are already learning that drug use and abuse is acceptable as long as you put up with it. They example they NEED to learn is that you are strong person and that you are looking out for their well being. They need love and support from you. There is also help out there for you and your kids with alanon and other similar groups. Think of your kids first and yourself second. As long as you stay your husband will continue the drugs. If he wants the marriage and rehab to work, maybe he will realize it won't if he doesn't stay sober.
2007-02-15 09:40:09 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is NOT a case where the kids benefit from staying together.
The kids may actually have a better father if they see him only part of the time.
Try to keep it friendly enough so that he and you and the kids can be TOGETHER on occasion. That could make a huge difference to them.
2007-02-15 16:07:11 · answer #4 · answered by Curt Monash 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hello,and may i say "WOW" do you have some issues to ditch starting with that loser,it sounds more like self-punishment to me for staying with the loser that he is .think of your children and the best thing is to get a restraining order stat, pronto,as in yesterday file that divorce and concentrate on those children and your well being also have him admitted to a rehab while you are giving his things to his family for when he gets out.just do it girl ,there is no question about it.thanks for listening to my answere,yours truly chip. the best to you and the kids
2007-02-15 09:11:15 · answer #5 · answered by chip d 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel sorry for your kids, what a bad influence both you and your husband are. I just hope your kids don't follow in the same path as either of you. You need to do what's best for your kids by concentrating on raising them, without getting involved with any other man until they're grown and out of the house.
2007-02-15 09:01:10 · answer #6 · answered by ♥Twinkle♥Toes 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i would say to get a divorce but there is no use if you don't want one you need to search your heart see if you want to take that final step divorce and if you love your husband its hard to go threw it knowing thats the end so do what is best for you and your kid's
2007-02-19 05:59:39 · answer #7 · answered by sweetgranny06 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
what kind of life do u think that u have to look forward to? he has gone to rehab, didn't work. people who do drugs can't handle reality. they do the drugs to escape from life. think of your future here, right now u don't have one. the drugs are always going to be important than u are. he will always choose the drugs before his family. don't u want to have a life? good luck choose wisely
2007-02-15 09:01:28 · answer #8 · answered by jude 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
go for it hun! he's no good for you. and the fact that you are posing the question suggests you already know the answer and are just looking for some affirmation... you know what to do, and you know you are strong enough to do it - for yourself and for your kids - you have to get them away from this. once its over you'll be great!
good luck!
x
2007-02-15 08:57:33 · answer #9 · answered by third space 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No not yet. Wait it out a little while longer and see if he OD 's so you can collect the insurance money.
2007-02-15 10:51:17 · answer #10 · answered by seahorse 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋