I'm with this man whom I've been dating for quite some time and we have moved in together, I have been married once before when I was real young, and he has been married three times, all his marriages failed because he works out of state alot, The differences between me and his other ex's, it that he always comes home on the weekends or he is having me go to where ever he is at. He didn't do this with his other ex's and he was married to them. He says he doesn't want to get married againbut his actions sometimes are saying something else, and finally after 12 years I am finally ready to marry again. Anybody have any advice as to how I can tell if he really wants to get married or not????
2007-02-15 06:16:09 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It sounds like he just doesnt want another bad ending to a marriage. He may just want to be with you as a companion. I would just come out and ask him to marry you, or discuss it with him casually to see what he really wants in this relationship. If your living together you should be able to just ask him about it. He may not want to hurt you the way you have in the past. He might have commitment issues once he is married, that bound for life thing can scare men. Dont pressure him if he isnt ready for marriage, that may have been what happened in the past relationships. Let him know your there for him regardless of your decision. Good luck!
2007-02-15 06:23:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it seems like you two already made a commitment moving in together. When you do something like that, he is always going to have something in his head that says "This is only temporary..." Sorry but it's the truth... especially when he's had 3 failed marriages in the past.... Just think about it. And try not to prove to yourself that with you it's different. I think you're going to get hurt that way. Even though he may SAY he loves you and all that and he wants to be with you, his actions show otherwise.
You two are playing house. And he thinks this is good enough for him.
2007-02-15 14:19:19 · answer #2 · answered by ( Kelly ) 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
What part of "I don't want to get married" do you not understand? And why should he, he's already getting what he wants without the "paper". Why buy the cow when the milk is free.
Stop wasting your time, since you've already wasted "quite some time" and find someone that loves you and wants to make a commitment.
Why are you dating a man that has FAILED at THREE marriages?????? I would call him a Loser
2007-02-15 14:24:54 · answer #3 · answered by ♥Twinkle♥Toes 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm not understanding why you are asking this question if he has already said that he doesn't want to get married again. You answered your own question already. Just be happy with the way things are. Besides if the sanctity of marriage is such a big deal and gay people can't get married, then divorced people shouldn't be able to get remarried....clearly divorced people don't respect the sanctity of marriage either.
2007-02-15 14:20:35 · answer #4 · answered by Huh? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If he told you he doesn't want to get married then I'd think he doesn't want to get married. Moving in with him was a big mistake if you want to marry him. Why should he marry you now that he's got you acting as his wife without him having to make the commitment of marriage.
2007-02-15 14:19:56 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Ask him.
But be ready in the case that he says he doesn't want to go down the marriage road again - 3 times is more than enough for anybody....
2007-02-15 14:28:05 · answer #6 · answered by chicchick 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give the guy some time remember he's been married quite a few times and you really care about him so just think about how he feels you are the women he has been dreaming of so let him know how you feel but let him know that you are there waiting but dont rush it
2007-02-15 14:26:39 · answer #7 · answered by jentn2000 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'd listen to what he says. If, after 12 years, he hasn't asked you to marry him, he's probably not going to! He may say he loves you, but he's enjoying having you at his beck and call without having to make a commitment.
2007-02-15 14:21:31 · answer #8 · answered by amazin'g 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since he already told you he does not want to marry again I'd say the answer is probably no. If he wants to he'll ask. Pushing for it and asking him could just ruin what you have.
2007-02-15 14:20:22 · answer #9 · answered by lunasage 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The way you can tell if your man wants to marry you is by him planning something real special for no reason.
2007-02-15 14:23:14 · answer #10 · answered by Tara G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋