under the age of 2. He says he will never do it again but he has cheated on other women in his past. I ;m having a hard time letting this go and moving on. He has changed alot but I still see him look at other women. please help
2007-02-15 05:56:10 · 10 answers · asked by tracy c 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
His past is the biggest indicator of his future. He cheated on women in the past and now he has cheated on you. The chances are he will do it again unless the two of you seek serious counseling and he shows some serious remorse and desire to change.
For your children's sake, I would try the counseling.
2007-02-15 06:03:09 · answer #1 · answered by kalea_kane 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know that the first reaction from everybody is going to be what a horrible husband he is, and how you should leave him. And there is NO EXCUSE for a married man with two children to cheat on his wife. But let's take a closer look. What is your marriage really like? Would you say that him having an affair was a complete and total shock? Or did you kind of see it coming? I am not saying you're one of them, but I am amazed at how many women will complain about their husbands looking at online porn or having affairs when they themselves deny their husbands sex for weeks or months at a time. As if 15-20 minutes of sex at 11pm on week night once a month or so is something husbands should just learn to live with and accept!
2007-02-15 06:03:15 · answer #2 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get some counseling, hon,,,, once a cheater always one...
Marriage is respect, admiration, passion and trust, hon.... the trust is gone, with the visual of him pronging another lady... and the respect and admiration are in the toilet too. You don't have a chance to be in a loving relationship without help, and he has to want to heal it too, or the resentment will just build, and every time you look at him, all you will see is a jerk.... and every time he oooooogles some other lady, you will just seethe.....(p.s. oooogling doesn't hurt anything, but when the guy was falling out of the beach chair ogling some 12 year old in a bikini, it was just beyond the pale...so the dude above is an idiot.... it was embarrassing beyond your wildest, and when we went with friends, eeeeeee....)
Be aware that counseling is no guarantee, and it will be two years... I wish you luck, hon....
2007-02-15 06:09:15 · answer #3 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
usually when one person cheats something is wrong to begin with. Not that I'm saying it was your fault. But something made him wander while you were there taking care of him and two babies. Forgiving can be easy, but forgetting is not. Looking at other women is no big deal. I've been married 25 years and find myself telling my honey oh my look at that broad! If he is serious that he won't cheat, but you don't trust him try counselling instead of just throwing it away. Good luck
2007-02-15 06:12:06 · answer #4 · answered by Kat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry you married such a creep. Divorce him, but only after the kids grow up and move out. They shouldn't have to pay because of your bad luck at picking a spouse. The research shows that they will pay the most if you divorce though. Keep it together for the kids, then when they grow up, leave the creep and take him for all you can.
2007-02-15 06:11:31 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
looking doesnt hurt anything, its the touching that gets him in to deep dodooo, get his attention by introducing him to the words child support and alimony payments that will follow him and ruin him permenantly. dont be afraid to lay it on the line, its you and your whole family and your future thats at stake. dont let him talk you out of anything either, this is where you need top take the bull by the nads if need be. good luck
2007-02-15 06:04:01 · answer #6 · answered by robert r 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he hasn't changed, he's just putting on a different face so you drop your guard and he can go out & cheat again.
2007-02-15 06:03:03 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
If you both want to work on this marriage, family counseling is where you need to start.
2007-02-15 05:59:39 · answer #8 · answered by mark my words 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he has cheated more than once, he will cheat again...
2007-02-15 05:59:58 · answer #9 · answered by Fred Phaggins 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dump his loser asz....skrew the kids its YOUr life....or maybe you should ake a look at yoourself...maybe he deserves better
2007-02-16 03:10:21 · answer #10 · answered by shouldnotlaugh 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋