I get attacked, accused of malicious things that never happened, over and over and then when I get angry at the moment I defend against lies, but then it all goes away and I do nothing to do what I know is right for our son - he wants out of her place and live with me, but doing that will hurt his mother - causing more anger. Then she does something nice and I reciprocate and then lose all anger, if I do something nice for her, there is no recirocation. She had my son buy me a Valentines gift, I ALWAYS took him out to buy her something for holidays, birthday, mother's day - but then I lose the desire to do what is right for him knwing it will hurt her - and then the process of search and destroy on her part starts all over again. I cannot hate, it is not within me - she abducted our son to a foreign country, I still could not take him away from her to break that relationship...I am torn...my son wants to live with me and be out of her place, doing so will turn her into
WW III ??????
2007-02-15 04:44:24 · 8 answers · asked by RealEYES 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It depends on how old your son is and what he thinks. If he wants to live with you just to get away from discipline or because he's mad at mom then he should stay with her. She wants to battle, but if you don't get mad or respond to her anger, it takes the ammo away from her. Yet, you still have to protect yourself and your rights. but don't let her walk all over you either.
2007-02-15 04:55:23 · answer #1 · answered by jimmyjohn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Lemme get this straight: your son's mother is a kidnapper--a fugitive of Justice--and she throws out these MALICIOUS ALLEGATIONS--ALL WITHOUT MERIT (something offered that effortlessly explains off her lies).....and you feel YOU'RE in "trouble in court"??? Uh....you're NOT in any trouble--not like your son's mother---who has some serious legal problems of her own: she's in hot water with your state, The Feds and InterPol; law agencies who seriously dislike child kidnappers.
Tragic is it your son wants out and away from her. That, by the way, isn't helping kidnapper mom's legal case any. She might can lessen her legal problems if she lets son go and releases him to your custody.
Don't waste time worry about hating her, man--you have to make efforts in getting your son back for HIS SAFETY AND WELL BEING....to hell if mom gets angry otherwise. Oh.....and on her anger issues....mom might be bi-polar--a mental condition that I'd be concerned about; something that can really have me calling law enforcement agencies and political elected officials in efforts to get your son back safe home.
2007-02-15 05:01:40 · answer #2 · answered by Mr. Wizard 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You must do what is right for your son, because he cannot do it for himself. HE is the victim of this whole scenario, not you - keep that in mind. She will just have to get used to it, just be thankful you aren't with her anymore and go on about doing what's right for your boy.
Stand by and do not get angry with her - give her no reaction when she expects one, that will kill most of her infantile behavior on the spot - it takes two to argue.
If she is constantly combative with you, it may not hurt to record (secretly) demeaning or potentially harmful (to your child) conversations if she continually tries to have them with you. And for God's sake, please take pains to make sure it doesn't happen in front of your son.
If I were you, contact your lawyer and have him/her on hand, also asking about what the next step should be in this situation.
Do what's right for your child...if it means dealing with a little fall-out so be it. He only has one childhood, make sure it's a proper one.
To the first answerer:
Being bipolar is NO EXCUSE for anything.
I live a very successful, productive, happy life and am afflicted with BPD type II. DO NOT lump people in the same category because of the actions of one. What you see on television isn't the norm for everyone. I know several people who are affected with BPD, and they ALL are wonderful, caring, responsible parents who would never think of acting like this poor man's ex.
There are many people who do not have any chemical imbalances whatsoever who are just as incompetent as this woman. Lay off the labeling, it's on par with being racist.
There are idiots in all walks of life, please keep that in mind.
2007-02-15 04:54:16 · answer #3 · answered by polishedamethyst 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your question is not very clear. How old is your son. Why does he want to leave her? The needs of a child are always more important than the wants of the child. This should not be about you hating her or loving her. It should be about the kid. Do whats best for him and don't worry about what she thinks
2007-02-15 04:54:52 · answer #4 · answered by N I K I 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it seems you have a problem?????so ask your self whats better for your son hes all that matters i mean you are the father so you can diced for him for his best interest and you and your x should find some way of making this work even if one of you get hurt in the process.
2007-02-15 04:58:35 · answer #5 · answered by rolando m 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She'll get over it..... take him. No Offense Grow some balls she sounds bi-polar.
Besides is it more important to appease her or to make you son happy? She is no longer your responsibility. Your going to let you son down though. And that would be a tragic!
2007-02-15 04:49:01 · answer #6 · answered by Duchess 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The reson divorces are so expensive is it's worth it.
That is the price you pay for marrying a selfish girl.
But your reward is that you get to have a new life. For that I thank my ex every day.
2007-02-15 04:56:01 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
find out why he wants to live with you, then take her and her olny out to dinner(public place), tell her how he feels and how you feel about the situation. then discuss how he can stay with you and her so both of you are with him. Not just one or the other.
2007-02-15 04:49:51 · answer #8 · answered by lilred25smc 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋