As I've aged, I've become more and more of a loner. I work and go to school, so I have enough social skills to function, but in the rest of my time I usually like to be alone. For me, being around people and being alone are almost like two different states of consciousness. I don't have social anxiety. In fact, I'm good at making people laugh and people like talking to me. But in solitude I just feel more free and I experience happiness much easier. I don't really know why I am this way, but being a loner just feels very natural to me. Some of the people I know find this wierd and think something is psychologically wrong with me. Are they right?
2007-02-15 04:01:38 · 32 answers · asked by Subconsciousless 7 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
I don't think there is anything wrong with you. I like being alone a lot too.
2007-02-15 04:04:44 · answer #1 · answered by Backwoods Barbie 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
No. I'm the same way! You're just an introvert, and that's not a weird thing. Ther's the extroverts and the introverts. Both usually enjoy both social situations and being alone to an extent, but we all lean more toward one or the other. I know how you feel, I struggled with this alot for years. In high school, I had very few friends, and even they were just like aquaintances, I just didn't have a need for them.I felt weird and tried to change myself because I thought that normal, happy people were supposed to be outgoing. But over time I came to the realization that being alone is just where I find more peace, and the most enjoyable experiences I have are when I'm alone. I go out every once in awhile, but when I have the choice to do something I want to do, it's usually something in solitude.When I go out, it's usually just with my husband, because he fulfills all the needs I have to be social. I can talk to him about anything, we laugh together, hang out together, etc. I don't feel the need to have alot of friends and go party every weekend. I don't feel comfortable going to clubs, not because I'm afraid of social situations, I just prefer to stay at home and listen to music, and even dance at home.I could have alot of friends if I wanted to, it's just not what I prefer. There's nothing weird about it, don't let anyone let you think you're strange for prefering to be alone. There are alot of people like you, probably the majority of people who talk on this computer are that way.You're normal.
2007-02-15 04:26:33 · answer #2 · answered by Lindsey H 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When you are the happiest when you are alone, means you are a happy and cheerful loner. A loner is considered as a free spirit, free thinker and an independent person ... most people who are able to change their world are that type. Be happy and be grateful about it and.... enjoy it since not many people in this world could really be happy and content when they are alone. For them loneliness is a taboo. They feel loneliness is a dreadful thing for them and and they have to avoid it.
But I do agree with you in theory, that someone could be completely happy and content when he is alone. A loner doesn't necessarily mean you are a woebegone or something. Those people you know who said that this is weird are simply lack of knowledge of human psychology. There is nothing wrong with you at all. And those people who judge you like that are dead wrong of themselves. They simply don't know anything about you and they definitely have a conventional stereotypical notion that when you are a loner in your society that means you are a venomous freak or someone to be feared. But for those people who give a loner that kind of accusation - really forget that they are weaker and limper than a loner, because once the loneliness thrusts their life, they'd pass out before they hit the ground..... they'd whimper like a little child sucking their mama's milk. ;-)
2007-02-15 04:08:45 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with you. Some of the greatest inventors, writers, producers, business managers, etc. stay by themselves to hear themselves think. It is healthy to not be co dependent on other people's approval.
Society needs people to feel insecure to manipulate them. If you are too social, they say you are co dependent. If you enjoy your own time and company, they say you have a social disorder. Don't worry about what people say and just do your dream.
When you're alone, you have lots of dreams and ideas so promote it and live as you choose. You are a free spirit, free thinker and an independent person...most people who change their world are that type. Good for you.
Its young people who have to go out and be with people as a compulsion. Young people have to have the approval of others to feel okay about themselves...fortunately we outgrow that need. Our willingness to be peaceful and alone is a sign of maturity and creativeness. These are your productive years.
2007-02-15 04:13:22 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, there's nothing wrong with you. Especially since you still do well enough around other people. It's best that you understand this about yourself so that you don't burn yourself out by being around other people too much.
You are just introverted. there is nothing wrong with that. You will always need more time to yourself and if you spend too much time socializing, you will feel frazzled. So do what feels right for you.
2007-02-15 04:25:32 · answer #5 · answered by kristin c 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WOW, we must be soulmates, I have the same issues. The older I get, the less I want to be in a crowd. I find myself wishing I were home, alone. But people seem to enjoy my company and I always have something humorous to say. I've learned the less you get involved in others lives, the less drama in your own. But then, I also have this other side of me that for some reason is mistaken for a dark side.
2007-02-15 04:09:26 · answer #6 · answered by Baw 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
it just means youre an introvert and work better when alone. some people are just programmed like that because its their personality. Long as you like it there is no problem but if you are a loner and feel depressed then yes you need to go see doctor.
2007-02-15 04:07:01 · answer #7 · answered by kp 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ahhh. Nothing wrong with that considering that you are able to carry on socially. It says to me that you are comfortable with yourself and when alone you are allowed freedoms that you are not allowed publicly or socially. As long as you are being honest with yourself and have no signs of depression or anxiety when forced to socialize, I feel this perfectly normal and ok!
Enjoy...
(I prefer being alone and not having to entertain anyone else as well sometimes! Gives us a break !)
2007-02-15 04:15:19 · answer #8 · answered by ivy9toes 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am the exact same way. I have friends, and I can be very sociable, but I am happiest in solitude. It allows me to be much more creative.
Many people cannot stand to be alone and do not understand why anyone would prefer to avoid company.
2007-02-15 04:07:09 · answer #9 · answered by Dendryte88 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
There is nothing wrong with you. It's actually a good thing that you are secure enough with yourself to enjoy your own company and not feel the need to be around people to feel happy.Everyone is like that to an extent.I feel at peace when I'm alone. Sometimes you just need to "veg out".You're very normal.Don't worry. :)
2007-02-15 04:08:23 · answer #10 · answered by ? 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No, you are right...if it isn't broken don't fix it...I think it just means you are comfortable in your own skin and good for you...there is no problem with enjoying down time with yourself...sounds like you like your own company and good for you, wish there were more like you out there...I am like that too in a way, but I do have anxiety socially...
If a person can be happy in their own company, then they are probably a pretty good judge of character...
2007-02-15 04:07:52 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋