I am only 19 and I got this girl pregnant and she is about to have the baby. I dont know if I am ready for this or not.
Please Help!!!!1
2007-02-15 03:34:07 · 34 answers · asked by Jason C 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
you were ready to have sex...you should be ready to HELP her take care of YOUR child!
2007-02-15 03:37:17 · answer #1 · answered by puppy love 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
At this point you don't have much of a choice to be ready or not.
You can help raise a child and not have to be with the mother. But, I don't think you should leave her to do this on her own. Remember you played a part in this child's creation.
Don't be a dead beat you will regret it for the rest of your life. You may think that right now you don't want anything to do with the baby but you will and it will drive you crazy to hear all the things that you missed out on. Besides you only have your first child once. You don't want to miss that, it is the best feeling in the world to see what you helped create for the first time.
You will never know what your ready for unless you try. This is something that is going to be new to you so have an open mind and just experience it. You have nothing to lose. once that baby looks up at you, you will know that everything is going to be alright. It will solidify everything in your life. It will show you the beginning to an accomplishment. having a child is a beautiful experience that not everyone gets to have so enjoy it don't run from it. Everything will be just fine and you will be a great dad.
You have taken a step are thinking about the baby so that shows to some affect that you care. Just take things one day at a time and you will get the swing of things.
Good Luck
2007-02-15 03:48:26 · answer #2 · answered by ~Skittles~ 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well i will tell you my story and you decide. I got pregnant when i was 20. My boyfriend only would stay with me if i "got rid of the problem:. I had a beautiful baby girl, and he left. Then i called him when she was born, and the moment that he saw a person that was made from him he cried. He realized that this beautiful child was made from him and he is just in love with her. When you look into the eyes of a child that is yours somehow you realize that you will do anything to protect this child. I know you are scared but you can do this. Just think if someone left you, how would you feel? And alot of men who leave women they impregnate when they are younger, what to meet there child later and they have a hard time making up for it. You really should be there for the mother of you child. DO i think you are a bad person if you leave her, no...but if you leave your child, i think you will spend the rest of you life regretting it. Take care of you child, help the women who is carrying it. BE A MAN. You were man enough to have SEX now take care of your child.
2007-02-15 05:49:19 · answer #3 · answered by younghotarmymom 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes. You are just as responsible as she is. That doesn't mean you have to get married, but you do have to step up and be a man. What would your parents say? I'll bet the same thing. This world has too many unwanted kids as it is. Babies are scary, but I'll bet you would grow to love the idea of having a kid and you being a dad. Of course it's scary because it is the ultimate responsibility -- forever!
You need to sit down and discuss the situation with the mom and what her expectations are from you.
As an aside, I know a couple that are your age and got pregnant. He decided to join the marines and he has become the best, most proud pappa! He grew up alot as most men do when they join the armed forces. I'm not saying that's what you should do, but it is possible to get through this together. That girl needs you emotionally, financially and the baby needs their daddy. Not just a sperm donor. It'll be fine... Man-up dude
2007-02-15 03:42:32 · answer #4 · answered by Lisa A 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, has this taught you to use a condom?????? I certainly hope so. If you are scared, it means that you know that you shouldn't have had unprotected sex, or sex at all if you were not ready to take on the responsibility.
If you are not in love with "this girl," you do not have to reside with the girl, or marry her. You do have to be responsible for this child for at least the next eighteen years. Step up and become a man, tough as it is when you are scared. You need to provide financial support for the baby and emotional support as well. There are too many fatherless children on the Earth struggling through their lives.
You have a chance to contribute to your child being a wonderful, talented and loving adult. It is an amazing accomplishment. You need to get your parents involved also, if you are able to, this is their grandchild and it is important for them to be in the baby's life also. Best of luck to you and God bless you all.
2007-02-15 03:53:18 · answer #5 · answered by Sue F 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Its not about if you're a bad person or not. It's about whether you next decisions are good decisions or not. You could leave her, but you can't leave your responsibilities behind.
You need to support the child financially for the next 18 years.
You need to support the child emotionally for the next 18 years.
The best way to support the child financially and emotionally, is often to NOT leave the girl.
Even if you really don't want to ever be with her again, you're commited to at least having a friendly relationship with her for the next 18 years.
Bummer for you... now is the time to be fully grown up and make some grown up decisions. It doesn't matter how ready you are... it's coming... it's life.
Some pregnancy counseling centers help guys too. They can offer you help. Try the yellow pages under pregnancy.
Craig
2007-02-15 03:45:33 · answer #6 · answered by Craig G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Okay, yes You would be wrong for leaving her because you were man enough to make this baby and you should be man enough to take care of it. There are very few good fathers out there and you should want to help her and comfort her. Right now is not good for you to leave her, she needs you more than ever right now. So put your pride and fearness away and grow up. It's okay to be scared, but in these cases, all you can do is pray and work it out. You can stay in school part-time and work also. Every thing is going to be fine. It is not as hard as everyone thinks it is.
2007-02-15 04:30:44 · answer #7 · answered by LiStEN<<<Is Retired!! 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I understand being scared, really, I do. However, as you said, you got her pregnant, you need to take responsibility. Why should she be left to deal with a new baby alone and you get to just walk away? Financially you are 100% responsible whether you want to be or not. Why not embrace your child since you'll be supporting it anyway? While you think its going to ruin your life right now, in time you may find that having a child is a blessing. Best of luck.
2007-02-15 03:39:20 · answer #8 · answered by duckygrl21 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This baby is now your responsibility as well. She didn't do this on her own!!! No one on here can tell you what to do I am sure you are big enough to make your own decisions, but if you do happen to leave her you have to be there for the baby as a dad. You can't just have fun and when you find out the consequences just up and leave. Thats not right or fair to anyone. Hope you make the right decision!!
2007-02-15 03:45:25 · answer #9 · answered by Nicole C 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sixteen and pregnant with twins. My boyfriend was the one who convinced me to have sex in the first place - when the condom broke, it was his idea to keep going. I went along with it, but now I'm paying the price - alone. He broke up with me as soon as he knew he would be a daddy. Don't do the same thing to this girl! If you think you're not ready, imagine how she must be feeling! It takes two to make a baby, and you should help her out.
2007-02-15 03:39:53 · answer #10 · answered by ? 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
well... that depends on what you mean by that. i don't think it's right to stay with a girl just b/c you got her pregnant. but you decided to have sex with her which means you should have been ready anything that may come of that. meaning you should help take care of your child. if you don't want to be with her anymore that's ok i guess, just make sure you give her the money and support to take care of YOUR baby. you were ready for sex, you now have to make yourself ready for a child.
2007-02-15 04:25:09 · answer #11 · answered by Amanda P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋