According to an article I've just read, more and more couples are not getting married and living together. I would suspect that a majority of those couples came from a divorce and didn't want to take that risk again. Then the rest witnessed the effercts of divorce on someone close to them and therefore refused to experience that pain themselves by not getting married. Living together unmarried seems like less of an headache when you break up, but if your partners die you may end up just like James Brown widow, with nothing.
2007-02-15 02:54:27 · 17 answers · asked by Bu Tran 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's just two people who want all the perks but don't want to do the work that makes a marriage work.
2007-02-15 03:01:19 · answer #1 · answered by kitkat 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I lived with my wife for 5 years before we got married. And the reason to do that was because we were saving money for house, cars, furniture, wedding, honey moon, etc etc.
We kept all of our positions together, but separately at the same time if you know what I mean. Still, if anything would have happened to any of us, we arranged things on a way that we could leave many things to each other, just like a will, except we never did an actual one. Our families agree with this as well.
So you see, matrimony is expensive, and housing can be also depending where you live (we are in Miami and is ridiculous how the prices are). Insurance is expensive here too, so you need to be ready with steady jobs and have some savings before you go and get married.
It also helps you to get to know each other way better, and to see how married life is, and see if the two of you are compatible or not for real. It worked for us, and we are now planning to have our first baby.
Divorce is out of the question forever. We will stay together until we die. And don’t worry about “how about if he/she cheats” as everybody always ask. We won’t do it, and even if any of us make the mistake, we will forgive. It happened before, and we did it, and we know we are really meant to be together.
2007-02-15 03:05:59 · answer #2 · answered by Dan D 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should find out what the law is in your state. In some states being together a certain amount of years constitutes a common law union, while others are worded that any couple who is perceived to be married is common law. Some states do not recognize it at all. This probably only matters if the relationship ends and the issue of rights arises.
2007-02-15 03:00:30 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Common law marriage is not recognized in all states. In those states that do recognize it there are still limitations. For example, living together does not by itself constitute common law. The couple must also hold themselves out to be husband and wife.
Common law creates problems with estates, as in James Brown and others. Actually, formal marriage solves more problems than it creates because of existing presumptions under the law. As to my take, I believe you should always opt for formal marriage, especially if kids are involved.
2007-02-15 03:03:41 · answer #4 · answered by SA Writer 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
On the one hand, I see nothing wrong with it. On the other hand, one of the things that makes you common law is using his last name. After you start doing that and living as husband and wife, why NOT go through with it and get that piece of paper? Even in a common law marriage, if it breaks up you STILL have to go through with a legal divorce.
2007-02-15 09:56:02 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're looking at it from two separately distinct perspectives: psychologically and legally. Common Law is a situation whereby the courts rendered their opinion stating that if you're with someone long enough (depending upon the state), then you shall be treated legally as if you were married when it comes to the division of assets.
As far as the other part is concerned, everyone is different with respect to their ideas of marriage and you based your assumptions ("I would suspect...") on unsubstantiated facts.
2007-02-15 03:08:01 · answer #6 · answered by Cdub 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it's stupid. People want to avoid divorce, but just not getting a piece of paper saying you're legally married doesn't take away the emotions if you break up. They act like not getting married is just as good as getting married - if that's so, then you're not avoiding the negative effects of breaking up. You are, however, missing out on the benefits of being married.
2007-02-15 02:59:54 · answer #7 · answered by BG 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have tried both I was divorced for 20 yrs before I married recently. I have a home and he has nothing, but I am sure I would loose 1/2 of what I own should he leave...I say be careful and have a pren-up.
2007-02-15 03:06:49 · answer #8 · answered by Radtech1996 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Then unlike James Brown's widow, each party should make sure they can take care of themselves in the event their partner leaves this earth before they do.
Marriage is a personal choice, but I wouldn't do it for the sole reason of making sure I had a claim on my partner's estate when they died.
2007-02-15 02:59:14 · answer #9 · answered by . 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont think any states recognize "common law marriages" anymore. If someone does not want to get married, but are worried about what happens in the event of death then they should make out wills. I personally do not believe they should be recognized.
2007-02-15 03:02:35 · answer #10 · answered by Angela C 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Do not invest more than 2 - 3 yrs in a relationship without marriage.
2007-02-15 03:19:44 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋