what is wrong with me ,how can i change?

Question

okay how can i stop being so careless about school i have been this way ever since the first grade i've been in high school for the third yr now but repeating tenth in 11th grade classes i only as of second semester have 8.50 credits and was originally supposed to graduate next yr currently i am failing all my classes what should i do how can i change what my life has been for 14yrs please don't criticize me for this huge mistake i know it's all my dault and i'm paying for it BIG TIME !

thank you for your answers so far but there is one thing or two i forgot to mention i do the work assigned AT school during class time but when i get home i procrastinate don't study and just hangout Would it be a good idea to teach someone else what you've learned that day as a way to study!?

by the way i'm 17 no job and i am a female for those of you who failed to realize!

Answer 1

You have received excellent advice from all the answerers, so I'm not going to repeat it. However, I have one more suggestion. Have you ever been tested for ADD (attention deficit disorder), or any learning disabilities? Ask your counselor or your family doctor. Unfortunately, in some people these are missed for long times. I struggled in school (but the teachers all said I was very intelligent) my parents were at their wit's end and they were both doctors, but at the time I grew up they didn't know about these problems. It was not until university, which I started late at 26, that I was taking some psych courses and they asked for volunteers for some tests. Lo and behold I was told that I have adult residual ADHD and suddenly all my school-life started to make sense. I learned different coping strategies and eventually I graduated with 3 majors, became a teacher, got my TESOL diploma, did an MEd.(at a famous US univ).... All of this struggle made me a much more empathetic teacher because I can recognize myself in some of the students and I know how to help instead of punishing them. So, as you can see, there are many different reasons why students fail and sometimes it is NOT lazyness, or lack of focus; it could be something far more serious. Go and have it checked out. If it turns out that you don't have the above, then I would try to follow the wonderful advice the other people gave you. Good luck and keep striving

Answer 2

I completely understand. I got a 5 on the AP exam for Calculus in HS. I also absolutely adore math, was in the math team.. etc. However, when Im working at the coffee shop that I work for.. and it gets really busy, and I type in the wrong change, or the customer sees the change I'm supposed to give HER and gives me the change in coins, or any mixup like that.. sometimes, i get really flustered. Esp if there are a lot of people (we serve gelato at our place and it gets ridiculously insane in the summer), and I've found a rhythm and someone messes it up.. and there are LINES of customers STARING at you with irritation.. So for me.. it was like a social anxiety panic.. or something like that. o_o I get really nervous and anxious when i have an "audience" and I'm put on the spot. my face gets BRIGHT red and i cant think and sometimes i shake. so what I do is I just pause for a second, tune out everything so that it's just me and the change that I have to give, and figure it out (just remember.. as a few have mentioned before me.. dont subtract, but rather, count up). Once you get the hang of it.. it'll become easier. ^^

Answer 3

Ok.
1. I am guessing that since this has been going on for a long time that you have already talked with a school counselor. Did you do what she/he suggested? They would be the first line people to set you up with tutors and mentors. I would suggest that you talk again with your counselor. Be honest and sincere about wanting to turn over a new leaf.

2. As for organization (to help with the carelessness) check out a site called flylady.net She has a system for getting organized and back on track a baby step at a time. She has a "Student Control Journal" that is downloadable (free).

3. Have you thought about asking some of the more successful students for tips? You don't have to ask the top students, actually better to ask an "average" student. The "smart" kids usually don't know how to study, they just "get it" the first time. It's the kids who have to study to get C's or better that you should ask. Find out if their are any study groups; you know, kids who get together to read the assignments, talk about them and do the homework. Maybe the teacher that helps with the Student Council or Student Government would know about any club or groups like that.

Good luck. You are wise in realizing that only you are to blame for your actions. You are wiser to ask for help.

Answer 4

You have taken the very first step in caring. Until you care nothing can change. You cannot make radical life changes over night.
Start slow. As that movie said baby steps. Start by setting small but achievable goals. Don't start out by setting huge goals because you will fail and then give up.

First you have to set up good study habits. The stuff in high school is not rocket science and if you are willing to just study and work you will be amazed at how fast you catch up and stay caught up.

But like I said you have taken the most important step. Realizing that you can't continue this way. There are many available resources I am sure in your school to help you.

But start slow. Set attainable goals (this will build confidence) and work hard. There really is no magic formula to success. Successful people are not necessarily smarter. They just know what they want set goals and work their rear ends off to get it.

You can do it. Like I said you already have the hardest part licked. You want to change. The first step is the hardest.

Good Luck to you.

Answer 5

I see many people answered your question with all kinds of ‘fuzzies’. Since this is a life long engrained behavior you need a drastic change of perspective on life. Get away from the ipods, computers, myspace, music (vids), popular clothes, junk (fast food) food, the mall, friends who tell you what you want to hear and try a dose of the reality of life. Try living in a homeless shelter for a week. Travel to a poor country and help the people there for a week. That should give you motivation to focus on the opportunities you have and also motivate you to help those who are in need. You can pass all your classes but still fail in the purpose of life.

Answer 6

It sounds to me like you are not having fun while learning! I know you're probably saying, "What the heck is this girl trying to tell me?, this is so bogus!" Well it's not, in 7/8 grade, I was failing every single class, but I always tried soooo hard! So I bought a fly pen top computer that let's you play games while learning, and they're not dull and babyish. Another thing is, does your friends help you study? Make a game out of it. And doing homework really does help!

Answer 7

Go to your counsellor or favorite teacher and tell them this. Reach out for help and you shall receive.
Why are you failing? Do you study and finish all your work and just make bad grades? Or do you skip class and miss assignments and tests that lower your grades? Are your parents or guardians actively involved in your education? Are you smoking, drinking, doing drugs, hanging out with the wrong crowd?
You have to find your weakness if you want to improve. But any teacher, principal or counsellor will be glad to help you out if you are sincere in asking and prove that you are going to put forth your best effort!
Good luck! Education is VERY important! It's not too late to change your habits and make something of yourself!

Answer 8

I am currently in a similar situation. I have a D in math, C in science, and a C in language arts! Does your mom discipline you? My mom took my phone away for these grade and he won't let me have it back until my grade come up on my report card...I also don't want to do things but i have to...in class i take notes that might be important. IN my free time i look over the notes before a test or quiz...I am trying to do alot better...maybe you schould set a schedule for when you will study, when you will do your chores, and when you will have time for friends, family, and yourself...good luck to ya!

Answer 9

You should talk to your counselor (at school) about it first. They'll probably recommend a tutor and summer school to make up for the failed classes/credits. However, you've got time to make up for it. An education is important, and you should give yourself some credit for making up for it now. Good Luck!

Answer 10

I have a lot of problems with things like this, I like to call it "slacking", or plain lazyness. There is only one cure for it, and it's simply to buckle down and say "That's it, I AM going to change, right here, right now, and I will do it no matter what!". The trick is to really mean it, then just don't think about it and go freaking do it!

Well, that's what helped me, lol. It helps also if you are challenged to do it. I like to have people dare me or make bets with me about it, like "I will pay for any videos you buy for one week if you get better, however if you don't you do it for me". Have fun, be creative, and DO IT! =D