Nothing mjor has happened. An old boyfriend contacted me. He is married with three kids. We have seen on another twice. He wants to take this further. Usual lines about not happy with wife, etc. I refused to marry him about ten years ago for reasons I don't remember. Tell me how this is a mistake and I will regret it.
2007-02-15 01:44:57 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You don't need anyone to tell you that you will regret it. You already know you will. Just stop seeing him.
2007-02-15 01:50:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
If he does not respect his wife..the mother of his children...do you really think he would respect you in the long run??? There are proper ways to end a relationship and having an affair does not sound like he is trying to end his marriage but sounds as if he's having cake and ice cream. If his marriage is that bad then a respectable man would ask for a divorce after counseling has failed before he searches for another woman. This is not the case here!!! Your gut instinct was probable right 10 years ago don't let it down now. He is making excuses for his bad behavior....if you have to sneak and see someone then that is probably a good indicator that it is wrong or poor behavior. This type of behavior hurts everyone as it is destructive. Think reasonably and not with your emotions as emotions will cloud what your intuition already knows.....you already know that this is not a good idea which is why you want to be "talked out of it"
2007-02-15 10:43:03 · answer #2 · answered by faithfulheart777 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
well if you don't remember the past, then it should not matter much, what should matter now is the present and the future. If you do like this person and care about him and see a future with him then ask him to settle his score at home first before you take this relationship forward.
If he has an unhappy marriage then why does he not get divorce? He should get a divorce first and then pursue a new relationship.
Ok ask yourself this question, do you want to be called a Mistress, a home wrecker cause that's what it seems like now.
Or after he is divorced do you want to be known as his girl friend.
It should not be too hard to answer this question. He is probably looking for some screw buddy on the side. Many guys make sobing stories about unhappy marriage just for sympathy sex.
All Marriages have their ups and downs, he is probably bored of havng sex with his wife and is looking for someone new. Do you really want to be a home wrecker?
2007-02-15 09:59:30 · answer #3 · answered by jimmy.parker06 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Please allow me to ask you a question in return. thanks. If you were married, and you thought all was going well between you both and then discovered that your husband was cheating on you, how would you feel? More then likely, betrayed, hurt, angry, sad, etc...I won't do unto others what I wouldn't want done to myself! I lived by that motto my entire life and don't plan on stopping. The easiest way to deal with this is simply just be his friend. If he wants to take it further, then he'll have to leave his wife first. Luckily you didn't marry him 10 yrs ago or you would be on the other side, the wife who didn't have a clue. You already know yourself that this is a mistake, so go with that and I'm sure you will make the right decision. Good luck and hope this helped.
2007-02-15 10:04:45 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes what is wrong with you? Do you like being number 2? The fall back, the piece on the side? He is bored and possibly unhappy in his marriage and you are enabling his bad behavior by meeting him. If you refused to marry him before I am sure you had great reasons, be glad this is not you he is cheating on. Accept you still have feelings, accept there is still an attraction and then stay away, unless you are an emotional masochist.
2007-02-15 09:52:33 · answer #5 · answered by draken 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
It will be a mistake if your seeing each other without the knowledge of the wife.
You will regret it because of the three kids...and of course for the feelings of the wife (who is not aware of what is to come).
2007-02-15 09:54:24 · answer #6 · answered by Israel 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask yourself do you really want to brake a marriage up...Nine times out of ten he just wants you for a good time...Ten years ago you decided not to marry him you must have had good reason for that...You are prob. not the only one he has cheated on his wife with,If that is the case ( I am sure that he will say he has never done this to his wife before) ask yourself do you want to risk getting anything from him...The most important of all you do not want to lower yourself to his standards you are better then he is...If your are asking us to give you reasons not to do this..Then your gut is telling you something is not right about this..I am sure that you are a very good women and you do not that label of mistress,home wrecker,or being the women who took daddy from his children..Please do not think I am calling you any of these names because I am not...Others will...I hope I helped talk you out of this..
2007-02-15 10:04:43 · answer #7 · answered by charmed4412 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am not a mistress but this is going to be nothing but trouble....just read the questions here in regards to cheating.......why start something that has a 99% chance of ending badly??? Why set yourself up for that? Don't you think you deserve better? And also, this guy is an "Ex" for a reason! Think Girl!
2007-02-15 09:53:04 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He is more than likely just wanting to use you as what they call a booty call. If he was serious at all he would leave his wife. He wants his cake and to eat it too. Leave him alone...tell him to work things out with his wife. Another thing, put yourself in the wife's shoes. Think about how that would effect you. She probably has no idea things are not going well between them.
2007-02-15 10:04:30 · answer #9 · answered by superstar 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Stop thinking about yourself and him and think about those three kids who will be devasted when they find out their father is having an affair with an old flame.
2007-02-15 09:53:11 · answer #10 · answered by eharrah1 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He is married and this will destroy him and his family besided if you say no to him, I'm sure he's gonna find someone else to be with despite his wife...thus I think he's not good for you
2007-02-15 09:58:41 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋