My boyfriend broke up with me and I was shocked and so upset. I'm 33 and loved him. We were together for 18 months. I was very good to him I cared for him a lot , he said I was being bossy and making him do things he didn't want to do recently. He was worried we may not get on well in the future.
I have to admit that I was upset when he wasn't spending enough time with me, and he used to go home to his parents. Sometimes I was so upset when he would be away that I would even cry.But he doesn't know that, as I missed him so much and I was attached. I suppose I was making most of the effort in the relationship after the first year. But he always said he loved me. I have that sinking gutted feeling every morning now. Another guy had been trying to get in touch with me several times during the relationship and of course I turned him down as I wouldn't hurt my bf. But I was curious all the time, and I was tempted to just meet him for coffee.
2007-02-14 22:17:53 · 20 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
So I met him since my boyfriend broke up with me and he was very considerate and nice,encouraging me to have a cup of tea and something to eat. He was sweet and has been asking how I am.He said he was looking forward to our next meeting and he sent me a smiley face, by text which cheered me up and made me smile. But I feel I still love my boyfriend. He broke up with me over the phone and it was a huge shock. He said I had some issues and I was bossy, but I'm not an overbearing person by any means, though he is extremely quiet. He said he had a lot of stresses in his life at the moment and that he didn't know what the next step was. He was sometimes uncommunicative and I found that quite hard to deal with. He even wished me the best of luck in my future. I am so gutted and wondering what to do next. I mean he still is a sweet guy, and I am worried and a bit guilty that I gave out to him too much last wkend, but it wasn't really an argument or anything major.
I need advice.
2007-02-14 22:26:08 · update #1
Well at 33 you probably know men and women are different when it comes to emotions---you're all teary over the relationship and how he didn't show you similiar caring and whatever---he probably did feel overwhelmed but couldn't tell you--typical lack of communications---next time talk your stuff out. Keep the lines open---check to see how each of you are doing. If it isn't going good, and not worth saving--hey, move on--life is too short. Good luck and have fun---see if this new guy is still around--start off light and see if fun dates lead to anything. One more thing--this happens to millions of people---so don't worry.
2007-02-14 22:53:05 · answer #1 · answered by fire_inur_eyes 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you're crying over a guy who spent maximum of his weekends at his mothers and fathers? How old is he? If he's over 21 then you ought to rigidity about that! Any guy who spends more beneficial time with mummy than his female friend of 18 months is going to finally end up a sad lonely mummys boy. you're a lot more beneficial efficient off with out him, somewhat if he did not actually have the heart to allow you to recognize head to head. What an absolute coward!!!!! sure it hurts, yet i imagine it is because you want the concept of being in love and with someone. the right one will come alongside, I actual have little question about that, and all and diverse you meet you'll adore otherwise to the finest. purely concentration on each and every of the little issues that used to harass you about him. And this new guy. Make it sparkling that you're nonetheless disenchanted and that no longer some thing will take position for a lengthy time period, you gained't opt for to to leave him feeling like you're literally in some months once you recognize that you've been on the rebound. notwithstanding so that you could entertain actual going out with him is an excellent signal that you would pass on earlier to you imagine!
2016-11-28 04:20:05 · answer #2 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe it's time to move on and go have a coffee with the other guy. If your boyfriend really ended things, there's nothing you can do to change his mind and it's time to move on. However, if you still think there's hope and you know you two would get back together, then forget the coffee because he won't be happy when he finds out. Good luck!
2007-02-14 22:24:46 · answer #3 · answered by FairyGirl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sounds to me like he has commitment issues don't let him waste your time. get back in touch with that other guy and meet up with him. don't get yourself depressed get on with life and have a good time. do what you want for a change instead of trying to make the other relationship work. even if you get bacvk together it probably wont work out forever so look elsewhere and you musdt still be curious or else you wouldn't have written about the other guy. live a little you aren't going to be around for ever
2007-02-14 22:23:57 · answer #4 · answered by confused 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
a man can only be a man if you allow him to be, if you saw a 2 headed man walking down the street would you think it was natural or a freak? I know that women are more direct and focused than us men but allow us to think we have some insight or learn how to lead us at the same time giving us the privilege to think it was our idea sometimes , I am sorry i don't mean to be insensitive I have just seen it too many times in relationships
2007-02-14 22:28:29 · answer #5 · answered by MinO 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to get stuff off your chest and it would be ok to meet this other guy. I am so sorry about what happened thoug. I can't say i know how it feels but it must really be painfull. You shouls ask this guy to give you a chance and this time you have a low profile. tell him you have learnt something fromt he separation and youa are ready to work on it if he is willing ti be there for you.
2007-02-14 22:23:04 · answer #6 · answered by cynnie 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ooops, you will bounce from one lost love to another by doing that (ie. the curious/coffee thing). Keep it all low key and you will never get to rely so heavily on others in the future. Then when they finally do let you down you will not have so far to fall.
2007-02-14 22:27:12 · answer #7 · answered by breezinabout 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
habe a coffe with the other guy and get yourself a copy of 'Mars & Venus on a Date ' by John Grey. You will understand what went wrong and will not make the same mistakes again.
2007-02-14 22:24:29 · answer #8 · answered by D B 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Meet this guy for coffee. Move on and try to forget about the other guy.
2007-02-14 22:21:35 · answer #9 · answered by Rocky 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
He needs to grow up and you cant wait for that to happen. Move on and go for the coffee.
2007-02-14 22:55:09 · answer #10 · answered by Naughty 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋