Help with my story....the phsycology of it is driving me insane!!!?

Question

My story is set in the Early Victorian era.
There is a woman named Jane. She goes riding with her sister Anne. Somehow, Jane causes Anne to fall off from her horse, and Anne becomes crippled. Anne's suitor (who liked Anne for her beauty) leaves her when he finds her crippled.
Jane feels guilty, and years and years she dedicates her whole life to her sister.....but not out of love. Out of guilt. Now, from here, all this phsycology I'm trying to make sense of is making my head hurt. Can a person feel guilty and dedicate their life to someone if it's not out of love?! But in my story, it must NOT be about love.
And all the time, when Jane feels that she had done something good for her sister, Jane feels good. Why? Because she feels her guilt being lightened?

Is it possible that every kindness Jane shows to her sister, it's done only out of a selfish, self-centered desire?

Answer 1

OK, well people change. What might have been the first motivation can change into some other primary motivation for actions
Psychology and writing are my two favorite activities, so I love this stuff!!!

So let's say that Jane first has a love for her sister, there might be. I don't know why she made Anne fall of her horse
Then she dedicates her life for her sister, and she might feel more and more resentment for her, partly blaming her for not having a life herselv (Jane's life) and partly feeilng guilty for making it happen. Perhaps Jane also feels that she needs to punish herself, and that is also a reason for giving her life to help her sister.

When she goes on feeling guilty and the need to punish herself for what she caused... well - are those two motivations enough for now?
I think those two are very probable of a combination, I have seen it many times in people. The motivation to punish oneself is actually a very strong one.

Why she feels good about helping, yes, that might very well give her a rewarding feeling of lifting her guilt, as well as she feels that the pressure of punishing herself is lifted, because she "did well at punishing today"

Another thing - because her self esteem probably isn't very good because of her situation (feeling miserable out of guilt and bitterness because she has no life on her own), she might feel that other people look up to her, and that she gets a lot of social reward in that way, because when people see this altruistic and giving person, they see her as a lot better than she is. They don't see the guilt and bitterness, only this kind of "mother Theresa". this might not just give her a better self esteem, but also give her some advantages socially

;)

Good luck with your writing

Answer 2

I am not a psychologist but it sounds plausible. Some guilt feelings go so deep that people do almost any thing to escape the pain! So taking care of the crippled sister was her only option at that stage. And still the burden is so much that she feels good when she does something good for her sister. The guilt lifts a little and settles down again.

I don't know how you are going to finish the story but Jane probably did what she did out of simple jealousy which made her forget about her moral values and crippled her for life along with Anne!

Answer 3

I definately think that it could be out of a selfish, self-centered desire. people do it all the time... when they feel guilty about something they try to over compensate by doing extra nice things for the person they feel they've wronged... Anyway the story sounds great!! I love to watch movies or read books that are set in that time frame.. Good Luck with the rest of it!! Just one suggestion Anne and Jane are really typical and kinda boring names... maybe something like alexandra or elizabeth or something less cliche then anne and jane... dont mind it, just a suggestion! :)

Answer 4

OK, as a fellow writer, it is spelled psychology. And second, Jane only takes care of her sister, Anne, because she feels like she OWES Anne something, therefore Jane dedicate her life to tending Anne's needs. Therefore every kindness Jane shows to her sister IS JUST FOR JANE. The only reason she is doing this, is not because Anne is her sister, but Jane has to repay her "debt" towards Anne. This is selfish and self-centered, because Jane does not do it out of sibling love & empathy, but just to ease her pain & make herself feel better knowing that fact the she did help ANNE.

any more questions, email me [e-mail]

Answer 5

why not? i believe there are people who are like that and live their lives like that. maybe u can write in such a way where at 1st it was done out of guilt and then later it becomes a responsibility. there are cases where a guy makes a girl pregnant and then marries her out of guilt cuz he ruined her life. and then later on sticking with her becuz of responsibility.

Answer 6

Why do you, in the first place, write such story that will drive you insane?