already in a new relationship we were maried for 11 years and he cheated the hole time but i just cant seem to get back in the game please help me
2007-02-14 18:34:56 · 23 answers · asked by tina r 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
look im a guy... first things first... don't blame yourself. don't even blame him.
we are all humans. what he did was messed up but we are all humans.
If you want to get back in the game, get your self together. look good and shiny. And go meet some guys. be pampered and adored. You are a beautiful woman and deserve it. how do i know? you were faithfully married for 11 years!
what goes around comes around so he'll get his even if you don't see it. those are the rules. take it from a cheater! your situation is very complicated and painful... complex. you have to stop thinking with your heart and emotions and make things simple. ANYONE can Love deeply who ever they wish. but you Loving someone and/or being IN LOVE with someone doesn't mean that person HAS to give it back in return. just go out there and shine and let that new special one come on into your life. your x isn't the only soul mate you have. i learned seriously that there's no single soul mate.
Good luck and contact me if u need to talk.
later
2007-02-14 18:47:18 · answer #1 · answered by lfis492aa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Whatever path you were on before you got sidetracked by this jerk is still out there...go find it! You sacrificed a lot and got screwed over - that sucks! Don't try to get back in the dating game. Do things you enjoy and you will meet others doing the same thing. Just for the love of Buddha DO NOT grab that first good thing that comes around - it's a trap! Stay single for a while no matter what and remember that life is not all about having a partner. I think people that have had time to be alone are stronger and more secure.
2007-02-14 18:57:09 · answer #2 · answered by GranolaGurl 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
get a new hairdo, some new clothing, a gym membership, join a group of singles, keep busy.they already had the other woman for quite some time, only we were last to know, so we are still hurt, and just find it hard to make the changes we need to make to move on. best if we take some time to get to know ourselves, we need to make sure we are going through the grief process, if we don't we will carry the hurt into the next relationship. it takes time to get over a hurt, he is already past it and has begun his new life, and that does hurt, and does seem so unfair, we just have to put ourselves back out there, and find what we need to make us happy. but we first have to be happy with ourselves, or we will be too much in a hurry and we might make the wrong choices.
2007-02-14 23:16:26 · answer #3 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give yourself some time to heal and get over him. Get yourself a new makeover and live life to the fullest. Tell yourself and show him that there's a better life without him. Meet new friends and enjoy your single life again. You never know what you might have been missing the past 11 years. When you are feeling great and have lots of confidence, guys will be attracted to you. Good luck, sweetie.
2007-02-14 18:57:03 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop thinking about it all the time. Feeling immediately follows thought and if you think about it you will have feelings about it, probably bad ones.
Join some clubs or classes that do things you are interested in. Surround yourself with people who support you. Make new friends, get some hobbies. Take time to do things you've always wanted to do but never had time for. Being busy will help you move on and before you know it you'll be so involved in your new life you won't even think about the cheating b@stard.
2007-02-14 18:41:18 · answer #5 · answered by heart o' gold 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What game do you want to get back into? Dating? Or get him back? As you know it's not a game, it's life, and it hurts sometimes, don't be in a hurry give it time to heal, what is the hurry? Just because he jumped into the frying pan as they say do you really think he is going to have long term happiness? Probably not, he will probably do the same to this newest one. I think you need to get some close friends and enjoy being single and take it slow, time heals all, and eventually since your apparently the more mature adult here, you will have a much better chance at happiness once your really ready to move on.
2007-02-14 18:44:17 · answer #6 · answered by K_Seeks4Answers 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Forget about getting back in the game. Use this time to appreciate yourself. Breathe in your freedom.Start doing the things you never had time for before. Make some new friends, go see a movie, find a hobby. Enjoy yourself! Someone new will come along soon enough.But for now, love yourself!
2007-02-14 18:42:22 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
As hard as it may seem for you to understand now..this is the best thing that could happen.
You are no longer with someone who is unfaithful, a liar..someone who doesnt appriciate you.
Although he has moved on... and that is only because he already had someone else.
No one expects you to move on straight away...
You were together for 11 years..that is a long time...
it is not easy..espcially for a woman..to just throw all those years away.
You need to get out ..yes...but by yourself..somewhere relaxing..somewhere nice..for you to think..get things clear..and get your confidence back..get your trust in man back..and be able to forgive your ex.
Once you've done that..you can start considering other man to start dating..if you want..or you can enjoy single life for a while..before you may want to move on..get to know yourself better.
2007-02-14 18:43:12 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tina, time to take inventory. Let's start with you. How do you feel about yourself? If you can learn to love yourself, to accept yourself as you are, without judgment, then you are well on your way to healing and finding a life for yourself. After all, if you can't love yourself, how can you expect others to love you? So love yourself, celebrate yourself, acknowledge what a great woman you are. You are complete exactly as you are, you are perfect. It is only a matter of time before the rest of the world recognizes that and comes flocking to your door. So believe in yourself, know how great you are and you will be comfortable with yourself. The rest will come naturally.
2007-02-14 18:42:50 · answer #9 · answered by judgebill 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is enjoying him like a multitude around, and the track is the hardship she reasons. She hasn't even had the infant yet, are you able to imajine what she will have the skill to do after the infant comes? with a bit of luck she will have the skill to place the youngster up for adoption so it could have a greater valuable existence than it would along with her. She appears like a manipulative individual used to getting her way. Hubby appears like he's a wimp! permit's a woman lead him around via the nostril. If she will bark orders, so are you able to. you have have been given greater of his little ones than she does. If this has been the only time he has strayed, you are able to forgive him and attempt to rebuild your marraige. yet whilst he maintains to allow her to bark her orders he would could flow(who's he dishonest on? you or her?) i'm involved in forgivness and letting bygones be bygones, yet a individual has to provide up hurting you. The "ultimate" lady stands up for her kinfolk, in case your husband no longer needs to ba an part of that kinfolk, then he has to flow. basically my opinion.
2016-10-02 04:14:40 · answer #10 · answered by Erika 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋